Going Rogue: Adam-Style

Was Adam Lambert’s performance at the AMA over the top or marketing genius?

By Steve Charing

We’re at the time of the year where we have earned the right to escape, albeit temporarily, from such weighty matters as Afghanistan, the economy, the vitriolic healthcare debate, and how Levi Johnston’s Playgirl photos disappointed. Instead, we will go light and examine the antics (or strategy) of the newest gay centerpiece, Adam Lambert.

As you probably know, the 27 year-old Californian was the runner-up in last year’s American Idol. Throughout the season Lambert mesmerized the audience and judges with his exceptional vocals and his flamboyant appearance (guyliner, sequins, black nail polish, etc.).

He tried to keep a public lid on his sexuality by not directly addressing the question lest homophobia do him in at the contest’s end. He wasn’t very good at that as photos of his kissing other males surfaced on the Internet. By the time the finale rolled around, Lambert was all but out to America. He made it "official" in a Rolling Stone interview following that show.

Alas, Adam lost to the bland but charming "safe" choice, Kris Allen. Although Lambert was arguably the most compelling performer ever to compete in the show’s eight seasons, he lost to Kris due to a combination of reasons with homophobia clearly at the forefront.

On the national tour virtually all the media’s attention and general buzz were directed towards Lambert, not the winner. That says more about the voting process than anything else and how the winner could seem more irrelevant than those contestants who had been eliminated. Case in point: Taylor Hicks the winner, Chris Daughtrey eliminated in Season 5.

At the recent American Music Awards, on the eve of his first release, For Your Entertainment, Lambert’s appearance was hyped throughout the evening until he finally emerged at the end of the otherwise banal show to perform the sexed-up title track from the album. Any lid Lambert attempted to keep on his sexuality during Idol was immediately blown off by a 100-mph wind gust.

With a back-up ensemble of scantily clad dancers of both genders and a clear S&M motif throughout, Lambert, wearing a silvery suit with spikes on his left shoulder led two male dancers by a leash. He simulated oral sex with another dancer, and (gasp!) he kissed his straight male keyboardist right on the lips. Lambert also stumbled on the stage during the number but recovered seamlessly. That stumble, however, was completely overshadowed by the suggestive moves during the song.

The AP reported 1,500 complaints to ABC from viewers over Lambert’s antics, which the network characterized as "moderate." And the network’s Good Morning America cancelled his appearance the next day.

Lambert was taken aback by the fuss.

"It's a shame because I think that there's a double standard going on in the entertainment community right now," Lambert told Rolling Stone after the show. "Female performers have been doing this for years -- pushing the envelope about sexuality -- and the minute a man does it, everybody freaks out. We're in 2009; it's time to take risks, be a little more brave, time to open people's eyes, and if it offends them, then maybe I'm not for them."

Adam Lambert is right on. Back in 2003, Britney Spears, Madonna and Christina Aguilera stuck their tongues in each other's mouths at the MTV awards but didn’t get much protest from the viewers. Women kissing does not elicit the "ewwws" as men kissing does for sure.

And gay men are a whole different category altogether.

In October when straight Mormon Donny Osmond (eventual winner) planted a kiss on the cheek of ABC’s Dancing With the Stars gay judge Bruno Tonioli and suggested more out of the camera’s view in an embrace and a dip, there was no ostensible brushback from the viewers. It was seen as a joke. But when the gay man kisses another guy, the earth falls off its axis.

Lambert performed on CBS’ Late Night with David Letterman three days later. He closed the show with a sterling but non-controversial performance of Whataya Want From Me.

On a night at the AMA that included a flesh-colored bodysuit worn by Lady Gaga, a total of 29 crotch-grabs from Janet Jackson and a duet from Eminem and 50 Cent that had virtually every other lyric bleeped, the gay man was the villain. Adam Lambert raised the ire of the public and caused the only backlash.

That tells you all you need to know about where we stand in America. But having this controversy and its attendant buzz right before the release of his album will serve Adam well as far as sales are concerned. And as he demonstrated on Letterman, he knows how to tone it down when he needs to. Adam Lambert is a star.

Photo: Courtesy of Kevork Djaansezian/Getty images

http://www.stevecharing.blogspot.com/.

Happy Birthday, Guerilla Gay Bar Baltimore

After only one year, GGBB is making a difference.

By Steve Charing

On the night Guerilla Gay Bar Baltimore celebrated its 1st anniversary at Mother’s Federal Hill Grille, three young women approached Byron Macfarlane (r.), one of the two co-founders and leaders of the GGBB phenomenon who was standing at the front end of the bar. They asked him for the now familiar purplish stickers that adorn those who participate in the monthly ritual of "invading" a straight bar or club in Baltimore City.

But in this case, the three women weren’t lesbians. They were straight, and it’s notable that even they wanted to be part of this growing movement.

Guerilla Gay Bar Baltimore was launched last November as an means to offer LGBT folks in the Baltimore area an alternative to the local gay bar scene and perhaps make new friends and allies outside the LGBT community.

"The primary goal of GGBB has been to better integrate the LGBT and straight communities in Baltimore," says Byron Macfarlane, an attorney and who is running as an openly gay candidate for Register of Wills in Howard County. "Along with that, we wanted to provide members of our community with opportunities to travel outside the ‘gayborhood’ and see parts of the city they may not be familiar with or may not feel comfortable in if they are by themselves or in a small group."

The popularity of GGBB took the founders by surprise. "I believe it has been a good year and we certainly have exceeded my expectations of the group," explains Mark Yost, Jr. (l.), a lobbyist and law student who is the other co-founder and leader of GGBB. "A year ago, Byron and I had hoped to have a good time doing this and expected slow steady growth. I think if you had told us that we would be having crowds of 300 on average, we would have been shocked."

In fact, the crowds have often exceeded that amount each month. Both Yost and Macfarlane seek out Baltimore venues that cater to a predominantly straight clientele and are not only willing to accept a large contingent of LGBT people but also have the capacity to accommodate the "invasion."

The announcement of the location is made two days before the scheduled event, which is the first Friday of the month. Using social networking, principally Facebook and word-of-mouth, the group has expanded by leaps and bounds.

The unforeseen growth over the year has been a major development. "Having over 1,500 ‘members’ is phenomenal and we truly enjoy our monthly gatherings," says Yost. "It’s been a place to meet old friends, make new ones and have a good time."

Macfarlane points out that bar owners and patrons around the city now know about the group and are welcoming and accepting. "Bar owners have been clamoring for our group to patronize their establishments. And now, a huge number of lesbians, gays, and allies have the first Friday of every month already booked on their calendars for GGBB and are upset when something comes up and they can't make it."

While most of these invasions have gone off smoothly, there was one hiccup at the Mad River bar in Federal Hill on the Friday of the July 4 weekend. There had been a lapse in communication between the GGBB organizers and management of the bar. That led to the Mad River’s staff not being informed of the invasion, and some ugliness ensued that resulted in the termination of two bar employees for their alleged homophobic actions. The manager profusely apologized for the miscommunication and for the employees’ conduct.

"Along the way, the people of Baltimore have shown that deep down, they are good and decent people, but we know we still have a lot of work to do," says Macfarlane.

But that mishap was just a blip during the past year. "The response has been overwhelmingly positive both from within the gay community and in the larger Baltimore community," Yost points out. "I think we are using our gatherings, which are to be fun, to also softly promote our goals of equal rights. The more ‘out’ our community is, the better served we are going to be in being accepted in society."

GGBB has not restricted itself to once-a-month straight bar invasions. "We're especially proud that we have partnered with establishments in the city to give back to those in our community who really need help. We've raised money for organizations like Brother Help Thyself and AIDS Action Baltimore," notes Macfarlane.

Yost explains, "In order to support GGBB, other LGBT causes and our own community, GGBB has returned home to ‘our base.’ It helps us recharge, regroup and to bring some new exciting events our own community." To that end, GGBB has held special theme events at Grand Central, such as Bootcamp Night, White Party and Octoberfest Sausage Party.

After one year, like any organization the co-leaders are taking stock of what was accomplished and where they want to go. "We dispelled any notion that the concept had started to get a little old when we had over 600 members attend this month's invasion," says Macfarlane.

"There clearly is still the desire in the lgbt community to have these interactions on an ongoing basis, and as long as that desire is there, GGBB will provide the outlet and the experience.

"GGBB is part of the slow, quiet, non-aggressive activism that can and will change attitudes toward members of our communities and, ultimately, lgbt rights. When people who are on the fence about our issues or are ardent opponents see us as people just like them rather than the caricatures they see on television and in the movies, we're making a big impact."
Mark Yost adds, "Baltimore is a great city, and we are trying to make it just a little more fabulous once a month."

For more information visit ggb-baltimore.com.

The Maine Effect

We are not ready for marriage equality to be won at the ballot box.

By Steve Charing

When Proposition 8 succeeded in California a year ago there was legitimate outrage throughout gay nation. How can justice and equality fail in a blue state that went overwhelmingly for the first ever African-American president? With all the time to prepare for the battle, how did LGBT leaders manage to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory?

Blame was quickly affixed to African-American voters, the Mormon Church, senior citizens, and a failure by LGBT Prop 8 to effectively reach out to non-traditional supporters. With varying degrees, all of these factors led to a dismal outcome.

Then came Maine’s Question 1 on November 3. Maine is a state with strong independent tendencies, a blue state with the only two moderate Republicans remaining in the Senate, and marriage equality already in place throughout New England except Rhode Island.

There weren’t enough black voters in Maine to scapegoat this time. The Mormon influence was not as dominating. And our side raised far more money than the opposition. We still managed to lose by six percent.

When we put two and two together, this time the answer is zero. Two blue states, two ballot measures, results the same: failure.

In some ways the results in California and Maine could have been reversed had we been able to offset the scare tactics. Opponents of marriage equality used their money to effectively instill fear by lying with scary messages about same-sex marriage and its influence on children. They succeeded in convincing the electorate that "defining" marriage should not be left up to "activist" judges. And, of course, the convenience of cherry-picked Scripture always comes in handy during these battles.

But we haven’t found that shield against such smear jobs, and until we do, we cannot win by referendum.

A well-known political axiom that had its roots in Plato’s Republic states you should not put a minority’s rights in the hands of the tyranny of the majority. People vote by emotion, and if submitted to a vote, we would still have segregation, racial discrimination and a ban of interracial marriage in the U.S. While in some cases gay rights succeeded by referendum as in the case of Washington State, same-sex marriage, as has been demonstrated now in 31 states, is a non-starter among the voters.

On this issue we must avoid such ballot measures lest we continue to fail. There are far more motivated straight people voting against us than lgbt folks and allies can turn out. It’s a numbers game, and we don’t yet have the numbers. And we haven’t found an effective answer to the lies.

In Maryland, we have successfully fought off such ballot initiatives ever since same-sex marriage has been thrust onto the agenda by way of the Massachusetts ruling in 2003. It’s easier to stonewall here because same-sex marriage is not on the books. In fact, our Constitution defines marriage to be a union between a man and a woman. Therefore, elected officials do not see the imperative for a constitutional amendment, which would then be up for the voters to decide.

Instead, we try to win over legislators with the hope our governor signs marriage equality into law. That has not happened yet, and it will be years away from such an eventuality. But if it did, a more powerful effort will be made to undo the actions of the legislature and the governor by pushing the issue to the voters.

For proponents of same-sex marriage, that should be our greatest fear. Maryland is a blue state, as is California and Maine. And put to a vote, we’d fail, too, unless our stories are told rather than the lies promulgated by our opponents.

That’s where we all have a role. We need to get OUR message out to the voters because our arguments are legitimate and truthful.

http://www.stevecharing.blogspot.com/.

Homophobia Mars Alderman Election in Annapolis

By Steve Charing

Scott Bowling (picured in foreground) knew the odds were stacked against him when he announced his candidacy for Alderman in Annapolis' 3rd Ward last January. He is a white man running in a heavily-populated African-American ward that covers the southwest corner of Annapolis and includes the neighborhoods of Parole, Homewood, Southwoods, Greenbriar, Annapolis Gardens, Bowman Court and Fairfax.

He is a Republican in a ward that has an 8 to 1 Democratic edge.

And he is openly gay.

Despite these daunting challenges, things were looking bright for Bowling heading towards the election. He waged an issues-oriented campaign as much against the status quo as he did against incumbent Democrat Classie Gillis Hoyle.

"Annapolis is headed in the wrong direction and I have decided to run for Alderman of the 3rd Ward to help bring an end the apparent paralysis at City Hall," said Bowling when he announced his candidacy. "While our nation and its citizens are trapped in a fiscal crisis, our leaders at City Hall are focused on frivolous laws, resolutions and analysis that do little to improve the quality of life for their residents. The people of Annapolis deserve better."

Bowling, a Mortgage Banker with Wells Fargo, didn’t run on gay rights issues nor did he draw special attention to his sexuality; he was a hundred percent focused on such local matters as taxes, fiscal restraint and planning. But at the same time he never shied away publicly from his sexual orientation. His life partner, Dave Miller (rear in photo), is the campaign’s treasurer.

Recent polls predicted a razor-thin contest with Hoyle. Bowling’s sexual orientation didn’t surface much until he picked up key endorsements, notably former candidate for mayor Democrat Trudy McFall, the local Firefighters Union and the Annapolis Capital. Then there were more frequent attempts to raise the issue of his being gay, Bowling told OUTloud, in an effort to instill fear in the Ward’s voters. "They tried to associate me with the Sam Shropshire incident implying that all gay men are pedophiles."

Shropshire, an Alderman in Ward 7, is accused of fondling a male Navy midshipman last spring, and a trial date is set for February. He has repeatedly denied that he’s gay. "The scandal has stained the city," said Bowling "and they tried to link me to it."

In the days leading up to Election Night, the Hoyle campaign accused the Scott Bowling team of removing Hoyle’s campaign signs. This was immediately denied by Miller, and in a message to supporters said, "There is no room for childish issues such as sign removal in an adult campaign on important matters."

Then the ugliness deteriorated more just 48 hours prior to the election. The following statement was issued by the Bowling camp:

"An anonymous and illegal flier is being distributed in Ward 3. The flier is filled with hatred and bigotry intended to motivate the historically African-American communities within Parole to vote for Democrats Josh Cohen and Classie Hoyle. Scott Bowling, a candidate for Alderman in Ward 3 has called on the U.S. Attorney General's Office as well as a Maryland Attorney's General's office to investigate this as a hate crime and as a violation of the Voting Rights Act."

"I am disappointed that in 2009 there are factions within Annapolis that insist on engaging and bringing this type of racist and hate filled activity into our City Elections, said Bowling.

"Such hateful language can very quickly lead to violence. We, as a community, must seek out the originators of these hateful statements and turn them over to authorities. There is no place in any City, State or society for such hateful and abusive language. I denounce such activities and hope that my opponent as well as the leadership of both political parties would do so as well; there is no room for hatred, bigotry or this type of politics in Annapolis." He added, "I am hopeful that the citizens of Annapolis and Ward 3 will rise above such a blatant attempt to prey on people's ethnic, racial, and religious fears."

Bowling told OUTloud that the flier contained specific references to his being "homosexual." It reminded voters of the Schropshire scandal and warned that electing such a person would be dangerous to children.

He said that Hoyle did not condemn the flier and refused to when confronted by other members of the media. Ms. Hoyle did not return a phone call to OUTloud requesting a comment on the flier.

Scott Bowling lost by 130 votes pending the absentee ballot count, which will not affect the ultimate outcome. He said the flier was definitely responsible for his defeat as some voters told him it changed their minds.

Off to a Good Start

Federal action on hate crimes is wonderful news and long overdo, but the harder legislation is down the road.

By Steve Charing

It took over 10 years since the brutal murder of Matthew Shepard and the dragging-to-death killing of James Byrd, Jr. for substantive action to be taken. But when President Obama signed the Matthew Shepard and James Byrd, Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act into law last week it represented the first time the federal government provided protections to LGBT Americans.

What a difference it is in having Barack Obama as president instead of George W. Bush. The inclusive Hate Crimes bill that added sexual orientation to the list of categories protected by the legislation was never going anywhere when Congress had last considered it two years ago. President Bush announced in advance that he would veto it.

Conversely, President Obama stated throughout the presidential campaign he would support such a measure. He reiterated that during a number of speeches to lgbt activists since taking office. He quickly signed it into law and spoke eloquently in front of Judy and Dennis Shepard among others at a White House reception following the signing.

"You understood that we must stand against crimes that are meant not only to break bones, but to break spirits — not only to inflict harm, but to instill fear," the president said to the gathering. "You understand that the rights afforded every citizen under our Constitution mean nothing if we do not protect those rights — both from unjust laws and violent acts. And you understand how necessary this law continues to be."

Indeed, lgbt Americans are victimized by bias-related crimes at a disproportionate rate than the general population. President Obama cited FBI statistics in which there were 12,000 reported hate crimes based on sexual orientation over the past 10 years. Imagine the number of incidents that went unreported.

Critics, who for reasons that are incomprehensible other than being pure libertarian at best or homophobic at worst, opposed the legislation. They call it "thought police." We hear that "some people are more equal than others," according to one unidentified dim-bulb blogger in the Baltimore Sun. Others scoff at the fact that the hate crimes provisions were tacked on to a Defense appropriations bill and would not have succeeded on its own merits.

Perhaps.

But the outcome is all we had wanted, and we will take any victory we can get. It finally put gay and lesbian Americans on an equal footing as other citizens when it comes to federal protections. One never knows if he or she will be a victim of a hate crime based on sexual orientation even in a more improving environment for LGBT folks.

The late Senator Ted Kennedy was a champion of this cause, as were the tireless efforts of the Shepards. And, of course, there were many others. It still was a tough go to get it done. We needed a change of administrations to accomplish this feat, and we should all be grateful for its support.

As difficult as this was to finally pass a comprehensive hate crimes bill, the other boilerplate initiatives advanced by lgbt activists and others are going to be much tougher. The Employment Non-discrimination Act, popularly dubbed ENDA, is next on the horizon. Employers in over half the states can legally fire an individual simply for being gay. In nearly 40 states the same can be done to a transgendered person.

Languishing in Congress for over three decades, the measure would make it illegal for employers to discriminate against individuals based on sexual orientation or gender identity. This includes firing, refusal to hire or refusal to promote lgbt employees. The House Education and Labor Committee recently convened a hearing on the transgender-inclusive ENDA [H.R. 3017], so ENDA is in motion once again.

Opponents attack the bill for the "vagueness" in the language that would spark much litigation. And religious groups, who already have enormous sway in government, oppose it lest religious organizations be forced to compromise their beliefs. Memo to religious groups: the bill contains very strong protections, so don’t sweat it.

The repeal of "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" is also in the hopper, and President Obama pledged publicly and repeatedly that he is sympathetic to the repeal and will make it happen. The challenge of getting this done is not rooted in public opinion. That is because the country is overwhelmingly supporting such a change. To be sure, recent polling data suggest that as many as 80 percent of Americans support repeal.

Resistance is embedded throughout the military, whose officers and NCOs are still comprised of largely conservative Southerners and rural folks who aren’t welcoming of gays and lesbians in the ranks. The top brass knows this and fear an insurrection of some kind, which is not a good thing when we are fighting two wars and have assumed the role of world policeman. That’s their mindset.

Why President Obama is hesitant to establish a timeline to the repeal effort is understandable. He needs to fight two wars himself: one is with members of Congress who have a large military representation in their districts and the other with the military itself to convince them that discrimination has no place in the Armed Forces and that previous social changes to the military structure were opposed but then adopted with no lasting ill-effects.

This is the educational process that needs to take place. And that’s why it cannot be pinpointed as to when it will happen. As I and many others have suggested before, the President could issue a "stop loss" order to prevent further discharges based on the policy. That sets the right tone. It demonstrates his commitment. And it prepares the legislators and the military that the end of "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" is near.

When these other legislative initiatives succeed, and they will, we could then try to wipe out DOMA—the Defense of Marriage Act. That’s going to be the hardest to accomplish, especially if the Administration keeps defending it in court. Let’s get these other measures passed first, for that will push the momentum further for the repeal of DOMA. The Hate Crimes bill was a good beginning.

Photo credit: Judy Rolfe and courtesy of Human Rights Campaign

http://www.stevecharing.blogspot.com/.

Running the Bases

“Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.”—Will Rogers

The Republican Party has a much easier time with their base than the Democrats. Essentially, the GOP base consists of three groups: Social/Religious Conservatives, Fiscal Conservatives and Military Hawks.

Republican leaders do little to risk offending a particular segment of the party. Many, if not most, share common Republican “principles,” you know, like anti-immigration, anti-environment (social conservatives tend to be more moderate on this issue, however), anti-tax, anti-regulation, anti-HIV funding, and, of course, anti-gay. But they won’t “teabag” when one segment of the party falters in their view. They save that asinine activity for the Democrats.

The 2008 election run-up was illustrative. The Republican base eroded during the two years prior to the election. But that was fueled mainly by anger by fiscal conservatives as President Bush allowed the federal deficit to swell to historic levels.

Social conservatives never abandoned Bush; he maintained that marriage was solely between a man and a woman, so they were content. Never mind that the country was mired in two wars, the economy sunk into near oblivion, and our standing in the world was somewhere between pariah and outcast. Bush was resolute against marriage equality. That’s what mattered most to them.

The same thing goes for the military hawks. They got what they always wanted: war. Two of them, in fact. Better to fight them over there than to fight them here.

So, when all was said and done, the Bushies garnered 25 to 28 percent support nationally for doing a heckuva job. These folks resided in the social conservative and military hawk legs of the 3-legged stool called the GOP base. Only the fiscal tightwads lost their devotion.

Democrats have a more complex conundrum. There aren’t groups of voters who fit into few and tidy categories. Democratic constituents really don’t form a base in a pure sense but a variety of bases that sometimes are pitted against each other. That’s where they differ markedly from the Republican base.

The Democratic base consists of large chunk of the minorities in the country, especially African-Americans and Hispanics. You also have conservative Democrats, labor unions, teachers, environmentalists, intellectuals, young people, lgbt folks, “Hollywood personalities,” pro-immigration, pro-choice, anti-death penalty, anti-gun, anti-war, the beat goes on.

Not all of these elements work against each other for sure. But not all work together either. The result: the Democratic Party. Gnawing at each other, yes, but also slapping the others’ backs following the uplifting election of November 2008, when the “base” was energized.

There was no back slapping, however, in the aftermath of the Proposition 8 debacle in California. The knee-jerk reaction of many gay activists was to blame not only the Mormons who disproportionately financed the pro-Prop 8 campaign, but African-Americans.

While it is true that socially conservative but Democratic African-Americans are largely opposed to same-sex marriage, statistical analysis post-Prop 8 revealed that as a group, they were not responsible for the passage of this hideous ballot initiative. Instead, it was older voters that tipped the scale on that one. Of course, that group did include socially conservative African-Americans.

Nevertheless, these two key components of the Democratic base continue to square off against each other. African-Americans who oppose marriage equality base it for the most part on religious grounds. Many also resent the comparison between the quest for LGBT rights and that of the civil rights movement, despite the pronouncements from Julian Bond, the late Coretta Scott King and other prominent black civil rights leaders.

“No people of good will should oppose marriage equality,” said Bond at the October 11 National March for Equality rally. “We have some real and serious problems in this country; same-sex marriage is not one of them.”

President Obama is feeling the pressure from leading a party with such a diverse and ornery base. His silence during the Prop 8 debate was irritating to gay activists. He ostensibly made a calculation that while his heart may be on the side of LGBT rights, his political brain told him not to alienate the African-American base within the party.

His problems with his LGBT base were heightened following his now controversial speech before the Human Rights Campaign annual dinner. He didn’t specify a timetable for passage of key legislative initiatives, and many gay activists huffed and puffed. The anger among these folks is palpable, and the effect it will have on a unified Democratic Party going into the 2010 mid-term elections remains to be seen.

That’s where we are now—a struggle, a tug-of-war. Democrats share common ideals and principles but fight among themselves.

This doesn’t happen with the Republican Party. At least not yet.

www.SteveCharing.blogspot.com.

Making the Big Play

Baltimore Raven Brendon Ayanbadejo’s support for marriage equality is no small matter.

By Steve Charing

As linebackers in the National Football League go, Brendon Ayanbadejo of the Baltimore Ravens is relatively small. At 6-1, 228 lbs. he is often outsized by his peers. But his heart is big. and he knows how to compete.

Besides being a solid and speedy linebacker, # 51 is also a fixture on the Ravens’ special teams, covering and blocking during kickoffs. His overall defensive prowess in Week 3 of the current NFL season earned the 33 year-old UCLA alum AFC Defensive Player of the Week honors. Unfortunately, in Week 4 he sustained a season-ending injury.

While he may be considered small by NFL standards, Brendon Ayanbadejo has left a large footprint on lgbt equality. Back in April, Ayanbadejo wrote a 364-word blog on the widely read Huffington Post titled, "Same Sex Marriages: What’s the Big Deal?"

He starts right off by debunking the argument that the opposition to same-sex marriage should be based on religion. "Church and state are supposed to be completely separated when it comes to the rule of law in the United States," he wrote. "So the religious argument that God meant for only man and woman to be together has no bearing here!" As a punctuation mark to this thought, Ayanbadejo added, "We are a secular capitalistic democracy. That's it."

He justified Barack Obama’s lack of support for same-sex marriage by stating, "It seems that Obama felt the need to embrace Christianity more to fit in."

Ayanbadejo chided the stunt pulled off by Britney Spears as an indication of how many heterosexual couples have hurt the institution of marriage. "If Britney Spears can party it up in Vegas with one of her boys and go get married on a whim and annul her marriage the next day, why can't a loving same sex couple tie the knot? How could our society grant more rights to a heterosexual one night stand wedding in Vegas than a gay couple that has been together for 3, 5, 10 years of true love? The divorce rate in America is currently 50%. I am willing to bet that same sex marriages have a higher success rate than heterosexual marriages."

He concluded his blog post with a reflection on the civil rights movement. "Maybe I am a man ahead of my time. However, looking at the former restrictions on human rights in our country starting with slavery, women not being able to vote, blacks being counted as two thirds of a human, segregation, no gays in the military (to list a few) all have gone by the wayside. But now here in 2009 same sex marriages are prohibited. I think we will look back in 10, 20, 30 years and be amazed that gays and lesbians did not have the same rights as everyone else. How did this ever happen in the land of the free and the home of the brave? Are we really free?"

And this much-appreciated support for lgbt equality by Brendon Ayanbadejo did not stop at the Huffington Post. Last month, he appeared with his girlfriend at the new offices of Equality Maryland—right across the street from M&T Bank Stadium—to offer more encouragement during the organization’s welcome reception.

How important is it for a professional football player to stand behind marriage equality? Very. And perhaps it can help open closet doors for some athletes down the road.

Esera Tuaolo was one of three gay NFLers to come out of the closet—after hanging up their pads. All felt they would have been hated by teammates had they chose to disclose their sexual orientation during their playing days. No active professional male athlete has yet to come out.

The main concern for gay athletes appears to be the locker room culture and the potential risks stemming from that culture. There have certainly been a number of anti-gay slurs spewed by athletes of several sports to create an environment where the closet remains shut.

But Brendon Ayanbadejo’s public stance on marriage equality may have opened the door—however slightly—for a gay male athlete to one day feel comfortable enough to extricate himself from the tight closet and be who he really is.

I was hoping to interview Ayanbadejo to see if the climate has improved enough for a gay athlete—football player or not—to come out. If such a player existed on the Ravens, would Ayanbadejo be an enthusiastic supporter of his teammate? Would he stand alone or would his teammates rally behind the player? Or is it best that the player remain in the closet?

But the Ravens PR manager would not allow me to contact Brendon so these questions remain unanswered.

Regardless, Brendon Ayanbadejo plays big on the gridiron, as he has been selected to the Pro Bowl three years in a row. And he plays big off the field. This is an ally we need if we, as a community, are to reach the equality goal line.

http://www.stevecharing.blogspot.com/

The Rainbow Glass is Half Full

What a vein-popping summer! Such anger, such hatred. This vitriol is mainly centered on the tug-of-war battle concerning health-care reform. Other interest groups are still angry and frustrated because their priorities haven’t been acted upon in the first 8 months of this administration. LGBT activists, immigration reform folks and environmentalists all have gripes with this administration and Congress.

It’s not a happy time with a slow economy and joblessness serving as the backdrop. And health-care proposals—fact and fiction—are keeping the dialogue hot.

We hear the contradictory epithets of "Nazi!" "Fascist!" "Radical!" "Socialist!" "Communist!" and "Terrorist!" Many nasty signs have been hoisted and yes, some messages were racist—all being ascribed to President Obama. Some have even taken to calling Obama "homophobe." It makes me long for the days when "Liberal" was considered to be a dirty slur, the former ultimate insult aside from "faggot."

Everyone is in a sour mood it seems, including me because of the idiots dominating the debate. But I was uplifted when I recently saw the images of Ellen DeGeneres interviewing her guest Neil Patrick Harris on her show.

It was a needed burst of fresh air for sure and a calming influence. Two out gay people on national television, comfortable in their own skin and wildly successful both in their personal lives and professionally. They have reached the heights in their respective careers and have broad appeal across most demographic groups.

And add the fact that Ellen has been named as a judge on American Idol—the highest rated show on TV—and Harris was handed the high-profile hosting job at the Emmys, following his splendid performance emceeing the Tony Award extravaganza this spring. Wow!

I reflected upon the progress that we are making when you see these two gay stars on the set together during a popular TV show. This would not have been possible 40, 30 or even 20 years ago. Is this symbolic of our finally turning the corner and on the path towards equality? We’ll find out, won’t we?

Gay activists, impatient with the workings of government and the political sludge that gums up the gears of progress, will be taking to the streets at the National Equality March on Washington October 10-11. Using Obama’s campaign pledges and the current lack of substantive results as the fuel, the marchers and demonstrators will be calling for several main initiatives that are at the top of the must-have list.

Among them is the Matthew Sheppard Hate Crimes bill. Introduced once again, the bill has passed both houses in Congress and is awaiting a conference committee to iron out the details. This should pass this year and the President will sign it.

The Employee Non-Discrimination Act or ENDA was also introduced in the 111th Congress by Representatives Barney Frank (D-MA) and Ileana Ros-Lehtinen (R-FL) in the House with 117 original co-sponsors. The bill was introduced in the Senate by Sens. Jeff Merkley (D-OR) and Susan Collins (R-ME). Again, the President will sign the bill if it reaches his desk.

A bill to repeal the Defense of Marriage Act or DOMA was just introduced in the House of Representatives by Reps. Jerrold Nadler (D-NY), Tammy Baldwin (D-WI) and Jared Polis (D-CO). Again, despite the administration’s all-too-vigorous defense of DOMA during litigation, Obama had campaigned to repeal the entire law.

This measure will have to navigate through tricky terrain, however, as legislators can and will be politically attacked for supporting the weakening of the institution of marriage as well as the other canards to be expected during the debate.

Frankly, I am surprised this bill was introduced this soon. It could very well be as a result of the anger that LGBT activists have levied towards the Obama administration and the Democrat-controlled Congress for scant progress.

As reported in the Washington Blade, Rep. Patrick Murphy (D-PA) expects that House hearings on the "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" policy will begin early next year. On the Senate side, Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY), announced plans this summer for a fall hearing, according to the Blade. Rep. Barney Frank predicts that Congress will repeal the law in 2010.

These are all promising signs. Nonetheless, we must be cautious about our optimism because ENDA, for example, has been languishing in Congress for three decades. We need all of us to keep the pressure on Congress and the President to act swiftly on these measures. We must not let up.

But the prospects are certainly brighter today. Public opinion is on our side on all of these initiatives and that helps our elected officials who are not dominated by right-wing dogma to make the right decisions.

We have a President, who despite the misplaced anger by some of our lgbt friends, will do right by us. We have openly gay celebrities not just taking up our cause but maintaining high visibility without threatened boycotts and other anti-gay backlash.

At this point in time, I say our rainbow glass is half full, and filling up more day by day, albeit slowly.

http://www.stevecharing.blogspot.com/.

Can Ellen Save American Idol?

When it was confirmed that Ellen DeGeneres, arguably America’s favorite lesbian, replaced Paula Abdul as the fourth judge on American Idol’s fabled panel, media observers were wondering if this was a smart move for the show or not.

Can someone who is not a music expert adequately judge singing contestants (in the early rounds) and critique (in the final 13)? Will Ellen overplay her incredible personality and dominate the panel? Will she blend in well with the other panelists? Will the audience miss Paula by the sixth week?

In my view and having been an Idol fan since Season 2, I think the choice was a coup for the show. Ellen DeGeneres has a sparkling wit and smooth charm matched by few others. While not a music expert despite her frequent dancing on her daytime show, Ellen, what she brings to the table is the perspective of the average audience member, if there is indeed such a category.

Randy "Dawg" Jackson is a loveable, colorful record producer and musician whose musical props are well established. Last season’s new (but unnecessary) judge, Kara DioGuardi, is attractive and spunky and also has a strong musical background.

Caustic Simon Cowell—the true draw on the show with his brutal honesty—has been a TV producer for years and has a keen ability to recognize talent—good or bad.

These are all exemplary qualifications for the panel. Ellen will be able to critique, however, from a fan’s point of view—something that hasn’t been tried before.

In replacing loopy Paula Abdul, Ellen offers sharp, droll unpredictability contrasted to Paula’s sappy predictability. Rarely did the oft-verbose Paula choose to zero in on the obvious flaws of a contestant. Rather, she usurped her time by praising the wardrobe or hairstyle of a contestant whose performance may have left a lot to be desired.

Paula sought to be liked. And that irked her acid-tongue foil on the panel, Simon, for his mission was to be disliked.

Being an out lesbian on the panel may mitigate the all-too-frequent homophobic jibes that Simon launches at Ryan. While not mean in its content, it once again reinforces those pesky stereotypes that are still out there.

Although American Idol has topped the ratings charts each season, there is a sense among the producers that the show is in decline. To be sure, the actual viewership is eroding if you look at the raw numbers.

There is a palpable concern that the audience is experiencing American Idol "fatigue" and that the show has a limited life span. Indeed, the panelists’ contracts are always a source of drama, and if a mainstay like Simon Cowell should depart, which has been a real threat for the past two or three years, it could sink like a stone.

For these reasons, the producers have tinkered with the original winning formula and added the fourth judge among other tweaks. What they have not remedied is the flawed and seemingly unfair voting process whereby "tweens" and others can text in their votes by the hundreds because of their passion towards a particular contestant.

There have been unconfirmed reports that Clay Aiken’s home state of North Carolina was virtually blocked out of the voting during the finals due to "technological" reasons. Similar horror stories surfaced concerning the voting in this past season’s final between the charismatic and talented (and yes, gay) Adam Lambert and the boy-next-door crooner Kris Allen. Some have even suspected the outcome is rigged.

Nonetheless, notice how all the buzz on the recent Idol tour was about Lambert as opposed to Allen. Look at the commercial success of Aiken compared to Ruben Studdard—his competitor and winner of Idol’s second season. Does winning the title actually matter? Or is talent and popularity the real winning formula?

As we embark on Season 9, Ellen DeGeneres is expected to create buzz of her own. In show business, buzz, especially if positive, often equals success.

Ellen should save American Idol, at least for now.

www.stevecharing.blogspot.com

Farewell, Good Friend

We knew the end was near when Senator Edward M. "Ted" Kennedy could not make it to the funeral of his beloved sister Eunice Shriver. His 15-month battle with brain cancer ended inevitably, and the beacon of hope for millions that defined Ted Kennedy’s career had been extinguished by this treacherous disease.

Ted Kennedy didn’t suffer a tragic death in a manner that took the lives of his three brothers, but his death at the age of 77 on August 26 was still a tearful tragedy and a loss that burrows deep into the soul of the nation.
Senator Kennedy was a steadfast advocate for the powerless during his nearly half-century of service to the country. His was a voice that rose above the others, and he was unequivocal in his passion and authenticity.

Regardless of how one viewed Sen. Kennedy’s positions on issues, he garnered reverence and affection from all sides of the political spectrum. As a senator, he made use of his innate leadership ability to venture into the tricky terrain of bipartisanship and craft significant legislation that earned him the reputation for being among the most prolific, influential lawmakers in our nation’s history. The moniker "Lion" was appropriately applied, as it reflected the power this iconic senator amassed and the respect he had accrued.

For the LGBT community, we would be hard pressed to find a superior, more consistent champion for equal rights, fairness and justice. Sen. Kennedy’s support for equality for the lgbt community was immutable. He spearheaded key legislation, such as the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) and the Matthew Shepard Hate Crimes Prevention Act and publicly opposed discriminatory measures including the Defense of Marriage Act and the Federal Marriage Amendment. He also fought against the codification of "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" in 1993 and has vigorously opposed it since.

From the early days of AIDS to the current struggle for marriage equality, Sen. Ted Kennedy has been our hero, our protector. A fierce civil rights advocate for all Americans, he saw the fight for LGBT rights as part of the overall battle.

On the most basic anti-discrimination legislation currently in play—ENDA—Senator Kennedy said two years ago, "America stands for justice for all. Congress must make clear that when we say ‘all’ we mean all. America will never be America until we do."

Was Ted Kennedy a perfect man? Of course, not. Who is? But the goodness of his heart, his conscience, his relentless push for social justice, and his countless contributions to society against the backdrop of the tragedies that were wrought upon his family clearly outweigh his flaws.

I salute Ted Kennedy as a great American and champion for the underdog, and mourn his loss, not just for our community but for humanity in general. Rest in peace, good friend; the Lion sleeps tonight.

Anger Management: We Could All Use It

By Steve Charing

The summer of discontent is about to fade away soon. At least the summer part will. This has been one of the stormiest, hottest, turbulent summers in memory, and I’m not referring to the weather. Everybody is pissed off at well, seemingly everybody.

Vitriolic town hall meetings around the country concerning health-care reform have dominated the news. Politicians are angry with each other. LGBT folks, environmentalists and immigration advocates are enraged at President Obama for not acting on issues of importance to these groups at a faster pace.

LGBT activists are incensed at former President Bill Clinton for his role in the nefarious "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" and the Defense of Marriage Act or DOMA. Clinton, in turn, is angry at gays for not helping him gain support in Congress to ward off DADT.

There also remains an unyielding rage towards the slow economy and bailouts used to revive it. Arguments are breaking out at the office water cooler. The terms "Socialist" and "Hitler" are being thrown around indiscriminately. Heck, Philadelphia Eagles fans are outraged over the signing of dog-abusing, ex-felon Michael Vick. But then again, those fans are perennially grumpy.

What’s going on here?

Clearly, health-care reform and its concomitant protests have taken over the spotlight in recent weeks. But it appears that these scenes of rage are not so much about the specifics contained in the proposed legislation in which several components have been fabricated for political purposes. (I wonder how many protesters truly understand the details.)

A lot of the wrath is fueled and organized by a small noisy minority who are cranky because they are out of power and that the country is run by an African-American who is decidedly smarter than them. They’re opposed to Obama at every turn, regardless of what he tries to achieve.

These are the same groups who idolize the numbskull Sarah Palin and believes her rubbish about "death panels." Some have even taken to carrying weapons to the aforementioned town halls.

Speaking of madness and Palin, recall on the campaign trail when she whipped her minions up in a frenzy to the point when some shouted out "terrorist" and "kill him" referring to Obama. And to her utter disgrace, Palin said absolutely nothing to tamp down the hateful rhetoric.

And then you add to the stew the nutcases of Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck and Lou Dobbs and it’s easy to see why there is so much stewing.

Even ex-presidents aren’t immune from the surly atmosphere. During a Netroots Nation gathering in Pittsburgh last month, an angry LGBT activist identified as Lane Hudson interrupted the principal speaker Bill Clinton with a condemnation of his role in DADT and DOMA.

Wagging that famous finger, Clinton replied with a shaky voice, ''You want to talk about Don't Ask, Don't Tell? I'll tell you exactly what happened. You couldn't delivery me any support in the Congress! And they voted by a veto-proof majority in both houses against my attempt to let gays serve in the military…And all -- most of you did was to attack me instead of getting me some support in the Congress. Now, that's the truth!''

Something could be said for the fact that gays did not mobilize support in Congress back in 1993, though it would have probably been futile then. But the President did not have any standing with the military based on the perception that he dodged the draft during the Vietnam War. That alone would have iced his executive order.

He was also a new president who eked out a victory during a three-man race and won with a minority of votes cast, so his legitimacy in the minds of many was never fully established.

With no cache of political capital to spend on this issue, the military brass led by Colin Powell, forced Clinton to retreat. And Senator Sam Nunn led the congressional opposition, so the best Clinton could do was the so-called compromise of "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell." Sixteen years after that debacle, the anger remains and is still palpable—in both directions.

The problem with all this finger pointing and irascibility is that thoughtful, reasoned ideas get drowned out by the noise. We saw the boisterous hubbub in Towson where Rep. Ben Cardin held a town hall. The country, already divided by the policies of the Bush presidency, is rupturing again after a brief feel-good respite between November’s election and the inauguration.

The anger by LGBT activists over the president’s perceived slowness in taking on our issues, I believe, is unreasonable given his right as president to establish his own set of priorities and schedule for his administration. Plus his term still has well over three years remaining, which allows time for action on his part. But at least the exasperation got his attention and demonstrates that we are not asleep at the switch like we were back in 1993.

Sometimes expressing disdain concerning policy or even towards policy-makers is healthy and in a democracy it is part of our fabric. But the heated furor as exhibited during this searing summer can be a bit much, and we should all take a deep breath and cool off some.

"Follow the Dodgers"

It took some work but I was finally able to locate the recording of the Dodgers' theme song, "Follow the Dodgers," when they played in Brooklyn. It was made famous by the incomparable Ebbets Field organist, Gladys Gooding. This song was played every time the Dogers took the field. For my money, it is the best team theme song ever. How they couldn't keep up this tradition in Los Angeles is beyond me.

Same-Sex Marriage and Incest: Another Stupid Argument

Letter Sent to the Baltimore Sun:

George Deller's letter, "Why stop at gay marriage?" (August 13), was a mocking response to the heartfelt commentary ("We're just like you") by a local lesbian couple involved in a long-term committed relationship who were married in Canada and have hopes that Maryland will soon recognize their marriage. In his bewildering diatribe, Mr. Deller intends to use his letter-writing gifts and implore his state representative to not only end discrimination against gay couples but to extend that goal to incestuous adults as well.

The vapid logic of equating same-sex marriage to incest is breathtaking in its absurdity. I'm not sure from which source Mr. Deller obtains his news, but I am not aware of any broad movement afoot where mothers are anxious to marry their sons and brothers are frustrated because the law will not permit marriage to their sisters.

In making this bizarre analogy, Mr. Deller demeans the relationships of tens of thousands of gay and lesbian couples in Maryland and at the same time he perpetuates the nonsense that the legalization or recognition of same-sex marriages will lead to incest and other unrelated consequences. For him to draw such a connection, Mr. Deller must believe there has been an outbreak of incest in the several states plus several countries that have seen the light and have legalized same-sex marriage. Of course, that is not been the case.

If that is the best argument Mr. Deller and others can offer to prevent marriage equality, we should be seeing same-sex couples who had been married out-of-state celebrating soon, which hopefully will open the door for complete marriage equality here.

Mr. Deller would be better served in seeking a reduction of divorces, adultery, poverty, drug and alcohol abuse--the real threats to marriage--not some imaginary threat based on fear and bigotry.

Steve Charing

GGBB Invasion Met with Anti-gay Bias

Two Mad River Bar & Grille employees fired for their actions

By Steve Charing

The Guerilla Gay Bar Baltimore monthly invasion of straight bars and clubs claimed its first "casualties" since the phenomenon began last November. Two doormen were discharged by the general manager of Mad River—a bar and grille in the midst of the bustling Federal Hill neighborhood—following complaints of anti-gay slurs and other allegations of homophobic bias on the part of the staff.

"This is the first time a bar has acted negatively towards our group," wrote GGBB co-founder Mark Yost, Jr. in a message immediately following the event to its ever-expanding list of members on Facebook. "I do want you to know as a group, we will not tolerate such behavior."

The examples of the rude treatment by employees and straight patrons were abundant. "I had a bouncer tell me to get off the landing because it's not a place to hang out, yet [he] allowed a group of straight guys and girls to congregate there all night, immediately after telling me to move," a source, who requested anonymity, told OUTloud.

He added, "Other tables were being waited on by staff because they were ordering food. When we wanted to order food, we had to go to the bar to order." The source also criticized how one of the female bartenders ignored the gay customers and how weak the drinks were.

Not only had some of the employees and staff been homophobic in their words and deeds, a few of the straight customers were as well. "In one instance a patron walked by and said, ‘goddamn faggots,’ igniting laughter from one of the bouncers checking ID’s," the source said.

The pleasant evening of July 3 that kicked off the holiday weekend started off calmly enough. But as the GGBB folks started to pour in—a total of over 350 attended the event—pushing the crowd to near capacity, that’s when the wheels began to fall off the cart.

To identify themselves as part of the "invasion" GGBB participants normally display stickers containing the group’s logo. It appeared that only when the crowd swelled with sticker-clad customers did some of the staff finally get the gist of what was going on.

In fact, the general manager of Mad River, Eric Leatherman told OUTloud that neither himself nor his events coordinator knew in advance about the "invasion." "We had planned on a smaller crowd for the start of the 4th of July weekend," Leatherman explained. "Had I known about the fact hundreds of people were going to come that night we would have added more employees and accommodated the crowd better."

Yost indicated in response to OUTloud that he notified Mad River via e-mail on June 29 and followed up with two phone calls the next day. He had left a message with a female daytime bartender (who, as it turned out, had been planning to quit by week’s end), but no one from the bar called him back. He assumed they received the message and had no problem with the group’s visit later in the week.

This lack of communication and preparedness among Mad River staff set the stage for the insulting events of that night. "I had several friends tell me homophobic comments they (or friends of theirs) heard from the staff, to include a comment by one bouncer to a person on the street that the person wouldn’t want to enter as it was ‘a bunch of fags in here tonight," said Adam Schadt, who is part of the GGBB group. "While leaving the event early on the way to a friend's birthday party, I heard one of the bouncers up front talking with several others in a mocking tone about the event. Still others told me that people were denied entry as they ‘didn’t have enough girls’ in their party."

Added Schadt, "Having been to all but one of the GGBB events, we have had nothing but positive experiences at every other location, even from the first few bars when our numbers were much smaller and we came unannounced. On several occasions I’ve had bartenders and staff mention how much they loved us and ask when we’d be coming back. This was anything but the reaction we got from Mad River."

Of course, not everybody had a bad experience that night. Sarah Billmaier and her fiancée, Jen, were apprehensive about going because they have not enjoyed straight bars recently. But as they settled down and had a drink they relaxed.

"Towards the middle of the evening I noticed this cute gay couple dancing and kissing - nothing too outrageous," said Billmaier. "I happened to glance the other way and saw a straight couple doing the very same thing. This not only made me smile but it also warmed my heart. When I first came out, I always wondered if there would ever come a day when every bar was for everyone."

After hearing the negative reports, however, Mark Yost had planned to contact Eric Leatherman to protest the treatment and harassment inflicted upon the GGBB members. Yet it was Leatherman who contacted Yost first after an employee noticed a number of postings to the GGBB’s Facebook page that lodged complaints.

Yost wrote the GGBB followers in a Facebook message, "[Leatherman] was extremely apologetic and indicated that the staff members who had acted inappropriately were discharged. He was concerned about the image of his bar and of his personal image and wanted us to be sure that we knew that he would not accept, promote or permit this type of behavior from his staff.

Indeed, Leatherman stated to OUTloud, "I hate that something like this would allow people to think that we feel this way about the gay community. It does not reflect how I feel nor does it reflect the position of Mad River."

"I believe his apology and his actions speak loudly and I truly believe they were well-intentioned and thoughtful," wrote Yost. "The behavior of this staff should be rightfully read as representing the individuals not the establishment. They are no longer there and that sends a pretty clear message."

Yost told OUTloud, "While the bar's apology was great and I truly believe that the employees involved do not represent the ownership, this incident is a sad reminder that not all people in Baltimore are enlightened about the gay community. As we continue to fight for our civil rights, it remains important that we go out, show our faces and build our community."

GGBB launches an "invasion" of a straight establishment in Baltimore with the bar management’s prior knowledge on the first Friday of every month. For more information about Guerilla Gay Bar Baltimore you may visit their website at www.ggb-baltimore.com or join the group on Facebook. The location of the next "invasion" is disclosed on Facebook the Wednesday before the event.

From Bally's to Ballyhoo

Why straight, religious model Demonta Walker embraces the LGBT community

By Steve Charing

A couple of years ago this fairly tall, well-built, exceptionally handsome man had been a manager at Bally’s Fitness on Route 40 in Ellicott City. His physique, like it was carved out of stone, was impressive enough. His personality was friendly, warm and most genuine. He was soft-spoken but engaging. And oh, those eyes!

One day, when I still was a member of that club, I summoned up the courage to suggest to Demonta (pronounced De-MON-tay) Walker that he should consider modeling. I mean this guy had everything going for him in the looks department plus he was as sweet as he could be.

It took some more prodding on my part, coupled with the encouragement from other friends and family who also saw the potential of Demonta’s posing in front of a camera lens, when he decided to give it a shot.

"At one point being in the fitness industry as a manager for Bally's Corporation, I found myself in a field that I really enjoyed along with meeting many people from every race and walk of life," he explained. "However I have always had a desire to become a bigger part of life and share a hidden talent that I was not able to do as a child growing up due to a lack of financial support."

He studied accounting at Baltimore County Community College before realizing that accounting wasn’t really his passion, although weight training, basketball and running were. Acting was a passion, too, and a dream.

The Ellicott City resident realized at the age of 35 that he would seek to capitalize on that not-so-hidden "talent" and try to enter the uber-competitive fields of hosting, modeling and acting. A devoutly religious man, Demonta calls his "talent" a gift from "the man in the heavens." Others would refer to his "talent" as strikingly good looks, but he’s too humble to say that.

Demonta has been on a fast track since he began his new career. Following some photo shoots in Florida, he has attracted sufficient attention to appear in other media. Demonta was an extra in the heralded film, Milk He has also been in a couple of TV shows, such as BET’s "Rap It Up" and VH1’s "Nick and Friends." He dreams of working alongside Will Smith one day.

Demonta has also shown up on a national advertising campaign for AT&T's Blue Room online experience. He had completed various photography shoots for Dolce and Gabbana, Kenneth Cole, Nike and Armani.

Beginning August 1, Demonta will be attending the well-known Tarsha's Acting School, located in Hollywood. He will use this opportunity to pursue one of the passions of his life—acting. "So look out Hollywood, a new actor’s coming to the silver screen," he warns.

One would think that his trek through the highways and byways of the modeling and entertainment worlds would provide Demonta with some exposure to elements of the LGBT community. It did.

"In my field and line of work, the fashion industry alone is run and coordinated by some of the world’s best designers. I have had the opportunity of going to Johnny Versace's mansion on South Beach every year for Model Week and even just for the pool parties from time to time. I have met many talented gay, lesbian and transgendered people that play a major part in the fashion world," Demonta points out.

"I must say I have a lot of respect for their talent and wisdom. In the film industry I have also met some of the most talented actors and actresses whom just happen to be gay, lesbian as well as bisexual who I will not mention. Wouldn't you just love the inside scoop?" he chuckles.

"My acceptance of the gay and lesbian community did not start because of my journey in this career," Demonta explains. "It has been instilled in me from the days of my youth." He adds, "As a straight religious man, I was raised by my loving and supportive family to believe not only in faith or a higher power, but also in ‘live and let live.’"

Demonta feels that the support he receives from the gay community plus his own understanding of how minorities should be treated will help make the world a better place. "We are all good-looking brothers and sisters in God’s eyes and in our own way, and this earth would not be our house without all of us coming together and making this a home."

Demonta’s sums up his career change this way: "Life is a journey true, but when you hit hard times in your journey it does not mean unpack. It means it’s time to change luggage and continue traveling to achieve your dreams and accomplish your goals."

That’s a good philosophy to follow whether your looks can turn heads or not.

Back Home Again

Equality Maryland’s move to Baltimore is welcome, but more is needed than just a change of address.

By Steve Charing

After five years of being headquartered in Silver Spring, Md., Equality Maryland (EQMD) has moved back to Baltimore, and that’s a good thing. Having the organization in our backyard is a win-win for everyone.

Nonetheless, during the time that the organization was based in Montgomery County, it had grown from essentially a one-man-band to employing at least six full-time staffers plus interns and lobbyists with an annual budget exceeding $1.1 million.

While that growth is welcome news for EQMD’s Board of Directors and supporters, the perception that it has been an organization associated with the tony Washington suburbs may have impeded its effectiveness throughout the state.

To be sure, a large portion of EQMD’s donor base resides in affluent Montgomery County as well as parts of Prince George’s, Anne Arundel and Howard counties. Most of these folks are white, male, professional, upper middle class or higher and are largely coupled.

They attend the fundraisers more regularly than the urban dwellers of Baltimore and rural residents from elsewhere in Maryland. This demographic helps to boost EQMD’s coffers but the organization suffers from the D.C. area identity when it comes to the rest of the state.

Lobby Day is a prime example. It is an annual event that consists of a rally in Annapolis as well as scheduled meetings with legislators to help advance the lgbt legislative agenda primarily formulated by EQMD.

Crowds at these rallies have been declining over the years where a few hundred seems to be the norm. And it’s supposed to draw LGBT folks and allies from all over the state. Contrast those numbers to census estimates that indicate that there are as many as 16,000 same-sex couples and over 175,000 LGBT adults in Maryland. A few hundred gathered in the cold in Lawyer’s Mall will not impress lawmakers. A few thousand would. And a strong Baltimore contingent, which had been lacking each year, would fill the place up.

"If we had half the numbers at Pride show up to Lobby Day, we would be patting ourselves on the back," wrote a lesbian from Baltimore on a blog. "There are a lot of folks who don't even know what EQMD is or stands for. How can we hope to mobilize folks if they don't even know about the group who is supposed to be fighting for their rights? In order to move B-more, we have to be in your face. We have to be in the bars. We have to be in the ‘gayborhood’ 24/7."

It is true that thousands of people flock to the streets and park during Baltimore’s Pride festivities, and a good percentage of them are African-American and women. You won’t see most of these folks at EQMD galas, but they are very much a part of our community and cannot be set aside.

EQMD’s relocation to Baltimore is a good beginning. But a special outreach, especially to African-American members of the LGBT community, is not only the right thing to do but it also would be advantageous politically.

EQMD should join forces with such organizations as the GLCCB, The Portal and Black Pride to address critical issues facing the lgbt African-American population of Baltimore. HIV/AIDS, lgbt homelessness and other crises facing black lgbt youth head the list.

It would mean that EQMD, as well as these other organizations, should go to the bars, sponsor the weekly black gay events in Baltimore, linking with black gay party promoters and creating political/strategic partnerships. They would disseminate information and listen to concerns. In other words, they should fully engage, have a strong presence and demonstrate their commitment.

Building support from this community will go a long way towards persuading African-American Democrats in the legislature who are more aligned with conservative black ministers than lgbt folks. Marriage equality and transgender protections have faced roadblocks, and part of the problem clearly lies with these legislators. What makes this so frustrating is that some of these delegates represent heavily LGBT populated districts.

Seizing upon its new presence in Baltimore, EQMD continues to seek ways to make inroads with the African-American and Catholic communities. The Equality Maryland Foundation received a grant from the Arcus Foundation to conduct focus groups in an effort to develop a strategy to increase support for marriage equality among these groups.

I am pleased that EQMD is moving in that direction, and I urge the organization to help establish grass roots political advocacy groups in each of Baltimore’s districts, such as the successful one in District 45 in Northeast Baltimore.

Baltimore is the LGBT population center of the state; therefore, so it makes eminently good sense for EQMD to have a strong presence here. Neighborhoods with sizable lgbt populations abound within the city.

Now that they have moved to Baltimore, it’s time for EQMD to shed its D.C. suburban image and to make itself known in Charm City and engage our entire community more directly.

Don't Ask, Just Repeal

Letter Published in the

July 14, 2009 Edition of the Baltimore Sun

I applaud the Sun's editorial (July 12) urging Maryland's Congressional delegation to make a more concerted effort to repeal the utterly foolish "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy which denies openly gay men and lesbians the right to serve in our Armed Forces.

The nonsense offered by the proponents of the status quo that openly gay soldiers in the ranks would have a negative effect on troop morale and unit cohesion is just that--nonsense. Two dozen nations, including Canada, Great Britain, Israel and Australia, allow openly gay and lesbian service members without suffering from a decline in morale. What does that say about the confidence Congress has in our own troops? Other Western civilized countries can handle this assimilation but the U.S.--the land of liberty, freedom and equality--cannot?

Not only have 13,000 qualified, skilled service members been discharged since this discriminatory law was put in place, but a significant number of Arabic and other linguists were let go, which impeded our fight against terrorism and, therefore, compromised our national security.

In the meantime, the Pentagon has allowed the enlistment of thieves, drug dealers and those of sub-standard intelligence to fill the ranks needed to achieve enlistment quotas. How is that going to keep morale high?

Yes, our state delegation as well as others in Congress need to repeal this law as soon as possible. Our nation is ready for it. And our nation needs it.

Steve Charing

Clarksville, MD

Don't Blame Us

Letter sent to TIME:



Reading Caitlin Flanagan's essay ("Why Marriage Matters", July 13) underscores how frivolous and unconvincing are the arguments put forth by opponents of same-sex marriage. They frighten people into believing that if gays and lesbians were allowed to marry, the institution of marriage as the bedrock of our society would crumble.

But the reality is that this institution is being threatened by a host of factors that heterosexual couples can by and large control. Gays and lesbians would no doubt face similar challenges. But all we ask is for the opportunity to be treated equally and secure the over 1,100 rights and responsibilities accorded heterosexual couples. And, we should not and cannot be blamed for adultery, children born out of wedlock, domestic violence, substance abuse and economic downturns that afflict too many heterosexual marriages today.

Steve Charing
Clarksville, MD

Temperature Control

Keeping the heat on President Obama is right, but let’s be realistic.

By Steve Charing

Towards the end of the Pride festival a young lady asked me, "When will Obama give us our rights?" as if he can wave a magic wand.

The next day in an uncharacteristically testy e-mail blast, Equality Maryland called on its supporters to "Give President Obama a Piece of Your Mind."

Recently a well-publicized partial boycott by LGBT donors of a Democratic National Committee fundraiser was in response to the Department of Justice’s over-the-top legal brief in defending the Defense of Marriage Act as well as inaction on securing other aspects of the LGBT agenda.

And the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network staged a demonstration in front of the White House to bemoan the lack of progress to repeal "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell." Other protest marches in D.C. are planned for the fall.

What is going on here is a series of sporadic outbursts of frustration by many lgbt activists who resent the DOJ brief’s language and the slow pace in which campaign promises are being addressed.

Beleaguered President
LGBT activists are not the only ones turning the heat up on President Obama. He is also being criticized by Hispanics over the lack of comprehensive immigration reform. Environmentalists are on his case for not acting swiftly on global warming. Mr. Obama is hearing it from Republicans who oppose everything he is trying to do to lift the economy out of oblivion after they largely put it there.

He’s feeling pressure from the left, the right, the center, the media—just about everyone. He’s too timid on Iran. He’s driving the deficit up. His healthcare plan will doom the nation. He’s too pro-Israel. He’s too pro-Palestine. And North Korea has its sights set on Waikiki Beach. It seems like it’s time for him to get another dog.

This barrage of criticism and demands resembles a national dunking machine where Obama sits on the platform and the whole country is hurling balls at the metal circular plate.

From our perspective, President Obama clearly could have imposed a moratorium on DADT discharges while Congress sorts it out. And while I doubt he personally approved the language in the DOJ brief, he is still responsible for it, and it counters his pledge to repeal it through legislation. Are these outbursts, however, the right strategy?

The political realities
Of course, we want our agenda pushed through. We have a Democratic president with a huge Democratic majority in Congress—a window of opportunity that will not remain open forever despite the GOP’s foibles. But let’s get real.

President Obama has been in office just over 5 months out of 48 months in his first term. He potentially could reach 96 months if re-elected. In the short time since inauguration he has dealt with problems that would make any other person find an escape clause in the contract. His issues are too numerous to delineate here, but I’m sure there is no question as to the challenges facing our country. Imagine McCain and Palin grappling with these crises.

Mr. Obama didn’t win the election based on a gay agenda. He won on "change" and to put Democratic policies in place and eradicate the previous administration’s mistakes. He won on ending the war in Iraq and implementing some form of universal healthcare. And he won by being the anti-Bush.

He amassed 365 electoral votes. Even if Mr. Obama did not receive a single lgbt vote (and 30% of lgbt folks did not vote for him anyway), he still would have won. That’s right, as a bloc, and I use that term loosely, we didn’t win the election for him.

But that doesn’t mean he will renege on his campaign promises to us. The key components of our legislative agenda must originate in Congress. It is that body that needs to act on an all-inclusive ENDA, to repeal of DADT and to pass the Matthew Sheppard Act while we still have this large majority.

Alas, the repeal of DOMA appears to be years away from passage. It’s not politically realistic that sitting Representatives will want to enter their next electoral campaign with their opponents harping on the fact that the incumbent is opposed to preserving the institution of marriage.

But we need to start educating them and it would be easier to succeed on this front if we can achieve victories in the other important issues first. Once we achieve equality in one area, it is harder justify discrimination in other areas.

As much as the bully pulpit is useful for a popular president to help frame the agenda and kick-start the process, Mr. Obama will not sacrifice any political capital on these matters—yet—until HIS priorities are realized. Congress, however, must act now.

What needs to be done
Barney Frank, one of only three openly gay Representatives, believes that too much blame is being placed on President Obama and not enough significance is being attached to lobbying members of Congress. "It’s not that Obama doesn’t want to do it, but you need the votes," Frank said. "You can’t complain about the president until you’ve called your senator."

It doesn’t matter if President Obama is on our side if Congress won’t play ball. A grassroots effort is needed to persuade members of Congress—district by district.

Maintain the pressure on the president to make sure he understands we’re not going away. Let’s try to persuade him to deliver a speech along the lines of his race speech in Philadelphia and the recent speech in Cairo whereby he reached out to Muslims. Here he could denounce discrimination against lgbt people and to reiterate his desire to be a "fierce advocate for equality."

If we become extreme, any reactive moves on his part would be seen as appeasing a segment of his base. And keep in mind there is a significant number within his base who opposes transgender rights and marriage equality.

At the partially-boycotted DNC fundraiser Vice-President Joe Biden told the lgbt crowd, "I want to thank you for being a critical – critical – voice for keeping the nation focused on the unfinished business of true equality for all of our people; and I know, and this administration knows, that we have so much more to do. I promise you, I promise you, with your help we’ll get there in this administration."

The window is 48 or even 96 months, not 5. Remember that.

Safe or Out?

The hesitancy on the part of gay people to fully come out proves we still have a long way to go.

By Steve Charing

It’s pretty much a foregone conclusion that the more LGBT folks who come out, the more likely our march towards equality will strengthen. When straight neighbors, co-workers, family members and friends know you as a person and then learn that you are LGBT, they are prone to be on the side equality and justice because of YOU. With straight allies, we will make progress. It’s a guarantee. They just need to find that comfort zone.

TV shows like Will & Grace presented images of our community through the antics of the likable characters. Clever and witty as the show was, it did tend to reinforce stereotypes that gay men are screaming queens or they are loveless. But all in all, we benefited since the show provided a needed comfort zone for an audience that in many cases never knew any out gay people.

When celebrities or other public figures come out—voluntarily—it gives our cause an added boost. Ellen DeGeneres’ coming out was the talk of the whole world. Although it wasn’t a complete surprise that she is a lesbian, the public still saw this as a bold and largely welcome step. Her career has since skyrocketed.

Years earlier Elton John admitted he wasn’t "bisexual" after all, but declaring he is gay didn’t hurt his career either. In fact, he emerged into superstar status and was even knighted!

Neil Patrick Harris has a successful TV gig going even after his coming out and deservedly so. He is not only a polished performer but he is right out there on the front lines fighting for equality. If there ever was a true lgbt role model, he is definitely on the list.

Others celebs, such as Rosie O’Donnell, Melissa Etheridge, T.R. Knight, Clay Aiken, Lance Bass and Lindsay Lohan came out with varying effects on their careers. But in every case, it was a positive development for the LGBT community.

Most recently, Adam Lambert, the runner-up in American Idol’s 8th season, came out officially and publicly in Rolling Stone magazine. No shocker there. But why did he wait?

Obviously, it was a calculation that while the AI contest was still in play, he didn’t want to risk losing the potent "tween" vote if he had been more up-front about his sexuality. It turned out he lost that vote as well as others amidst the swirling rumors fueled by his guy-liner, wild costumes and enlightening photos.

Would it have changed the results had he come out during the show’s run? Not likely. While some would have given Lambert props for his courage, those voters who were inclined to vote for Kris Allen would have continued to do so.

Lambert’s coming out is welcome to be sure, but his comment to Rolling Stone, "I'm trying to be a singer, not a civil rights leader," tempered the enthusiasm some.

Other "out’ celebrities have been even more reluctant. They are known to be gay but don’t want to push the envelope. One prominent local celebrity who had come out in the Baltimore Sun declined an interview with OUTloud lest she be defined by her sexual orientation. Despite the fact she would have been embraced as a role model, this iconic figure is ostensibly "playing it safe."

Also puzzling was the rationale given by the staff of Sex in the City’s Cynthia Nixon to an OUTloud request to publish the text of a recent speech at Equality Maryland’s "Night Out For Equality," where she had been the guest of honor. Her speech garnered a standing ovation from the 400 or so in attendance.

On May 17 the actress had publicly announced her engagement to Christine Marinoni at a gay-rights rally in New York. Her address to the cheering crowd is on You Tube. It made all the papers. She’s out!

But when asked to allow our readers to see her exceptional speech in print from the "Night Out for Equality" event, we learned through an intermediary that the Cynthia Nixon camp did not want to release the text to the press because they were worried that the words would be taken out of context.

That’s as mystifying as it gets. If the spoken word is not considered vulnerable to misinterpretation, why would the written word be taken out of context? This safe and cautious approach mitigates the gutsy pronouncements from other celebrities who come out unambiguously.

It’s bad enough that gay and lesbian elected officials tend to remain in the closet. Gay professional athletes fear coming out. Other gay and lesbian celebrities stay closeted as well. And that’s a sad thought especially since we are in the midst of celebrating Pride.

But if you are out, then REALLY come out. All this caution does is demonstrate that there is still fear, still trepidation, still hesitation for declaring unequivocally who you are as a person. That shouldn’t be.

Apparently, we still have a long way to go.

California Quake

The court decision was a setback, but it will make us focus on a better strategy.

By Steve Charing

As recently as 10 years ago, few thought that "gay marriage" would ever be at the forefront of a national dialogue.

At the time, the LGBT community and allies were reeling from the failed effort to allow openly gay and lesbians to serve in the Armed Forces. We were trying to nudge a bill through Congress that would provide anti-discrimination protections in the workplace for gays and lesbians. And we were attempting to enact legislation at the state and local levels to protect the gay and lesbian community from discrimination in employment, housing and public accommodations.

That was our agenda a decade ago.

It all changed on May 17, 2004, when the Supreme Judicial Court of Massachusetts ruled in Goodridge v. Department of Public Health that the state constitution couldn’t limit marriage to heterosexual couples. The issue of same-sex marriage was all-of-a-sudden thrust near the top of the national debate when conservative religious groups and others went ballistic.

Ballot initiatives in 11 states to ban gay marriage popped up like spring dandelions. All passed. Many believe that the controversy generated enough evangelical voters in Ohio to tip the election to George W. Bush in 2004.

Accordingly, gay activists were unprepared for this war compared to the more organized and better funded religious right. Our side depended largely—but not entirely—on having the courts remedy what has been seen as violation of the equal protection clause in many of the states’ constitutions as well as the 14th Amendment of the U.S. Constitution.

Fast-forward to the recent California Supreme Court ruling by a 6-1 vote that disheartened the LGBT community and supporters by upholding the iniquitous Proposition 8 outcome that resulted from the November 2008 ballot measure. Although the approximate 18,000 couples who married prior to the election result were permitted to retain their status, the disappointing, but not necessarily surprising court decision, prompted an angry backlash from marriage equality advocates.

The ruling highlighted the fact that the judicial system, while helpful in many cases, cannot totally be counted on to make same-sex marriage a reality. This energy generated from the decision will be channeled in California to appeal to the voters again and essentially reverse the outcome of Prop 8.

That’s the correct strategy.

Hopefully with better leadership of this effort it will be successful. A new coalition needs to come in and work with clergy of all religions to alleviate concerns and to emphasize that civil marriage is what is being sought—not religious blessings.

These leaders should reach out more aggressively to the African-American community to highlight the similarities between the civil rights movement and what gays and lesbians are seeking.

And why not take advantage of the many PFLAG chapters in California to allow representatives speak to senior citizen groups and educate them on the true meaning of family values? More than any other demographic, seniors accounted for the largest percentage of those who supported Prop. 8.

It’s far more expedient to file a suit in a court and hope that the judge or panel of judges issues a favorable decision. The judicial system is supposed to be our safety net. But what if that fails, then what?

We need to go back to the fundamental process of building grass-root support and having dialogues with key groups that are persuadable. Let’s take that approach, even if it requires a few years, and allow the issue to be decided by the legislatures, if not the voters, per se. Elected officials, more often than not, follow the will of the people.

The work is made easier when more and more gay folks come out. You would be surprised as to how many people support our efforts who would ordinarily not side with us. Steve Schmidt, the chief campaign strategist for none other than John McCain, comes to mind. His sister is a lesbian.

This would be a violation of the aphorism, don’t let the rights of a minority be put up for a popular vote. But that may be the best route to take in the long run. In California, for example, we cannot change the minds of the justices, but we can change the voters’ minds if an effective strategy is crafted and executed. And that could reverse the results; after all, we only lost by 4.5 points back in November.

To underscore this strategy, a bunch of lgbt advocacy groups including the ACLU are urging others to refrain from filing federal lawsuits because as they see it, the Supreme Court does not have the make-up at this time to rule favorably on a same-sex marriage case.

There are others, however, who believe that going to court is our best course of action. Lawyers Theodore Olson and David Boies—adversaries in the Bush v. Gore case following the bungled 2000 Florida vote—are leading the way.

A blogger on LGBT Rainbow Links FOCUS.com supports this approach by writing, "Either you go full steam ahead in war or just sit on the sidelines and lick your wounds. That's the trouble with ‘our society’ when it comes to the ‘LGBT leaders’ and time to put up or shut up, they fall to the wayside like a bunch of weak little mice."

But he adds, "You want gay marriage, you want equal rights, then be prepared to get down in the trenches and get dirty. Take the battle where it should have gone before."

And that battle is taking it to the people, which is the best strategy. File the suits in the courts anyway, but win the people over, too.

Did Adam Lambert Fall to Homophobia?

By Steve Charing

To American Idol fans, the showdown between Adam Lambert and Kris Allen presented a marked contrast in singing styles, appearance, culture, sexual identity and yes, talent. To the LGBT community and its supporters, the heavily favored Lambert offered the first real chance of a gay American Idol winner and to happen so close to the upcoming Pride celebrations.

Clay Aiken had a good chance of winning in Season 2 but curious phone line snafus from his home state of North Carolina that impeded the voting process kept him from the crown. But Aiken came out of the closet years afterwards, so it would be conjecture that had he won, he would be considered a gay American Idol.

Adam Lambert did not pronounce publicly on the show that he is gay. Rumors and photos swirled around the Internet that reinforced the speculation that had resulted from his eyeliner make-up, painted black fingernails, blue-black hair and his earrings. Add that to his ability to reach those impossible high notes and the jury came in with a verdict.

All he said on the subject was, "I know who I am. I’m an honest guy, and I’m just going to keep singing." Usually straight guys in response to such a question would be a bit more direct.

Thus, for all practical purposes, the country saw him as the gay contestant. But did that account for his upset loss that embittered so many of his fans?

In his Newsweek Pop Vox blog, Ramin Setoodeh offered several reasons for the outcome, including the gay factor. He mentioned that the judges were so much in Adam’s camp that there was a backlash among certain voters. He pointed out that "tweens" were enamoured with Kris Allen, and they are the ones with the energy and text messaging tools to vote and vote and vote.

Then there was the Christian factor. Although Adam never professed his religious beliefs, Kris and third-place finisher Danny Gokey—both who are married—were very up front about their faith and their work with the Christian church. Many Idol viewers are from rural America and small towns and cities where the Christian population is heaviest. They see the program as family-friendly, and that may explain why most of the previous winners came from the south.

Regardless of sexual orientation, Adam’s appearance and style probably did not wear well with these folks. So the theory goes that when Gokey was eliminated, his voters jumped on the Kris bandwagon. And that was fueled by Christian blogs who labeled Adam as the devil and pushed hard for Kris.

Then there was the voting and its questionable rules. The prevailing rumor is that Arkansas—Kris’ home state with a population of less that 3 million people—managed to cast 38 million out of the total 100 million votes using computerized auto redial features and heavy texting.

If this is true, I’m happy that Arkansas has such technical skills, but it clearly skews the choice for an American Idol. It is noteworthy that the producers did not reveal the final voting breakdown. Why not full disclosure unless they see it as a controversy they prefer to avoid.

Although many have used the alleged "screeching" in Adam’s performances as the reason for voting for the rather bland but likeable Kris Allen, I don’t buy it. Virtually every voice coach and singing expert I’ve read said that Adam’s ability to reach such high notes pitch perfect is amazing, and definitely not a screech. "Tracks of My Tears," "Mad World," "If I Can't Have You" were performed brilliantly and without the so-called screeching.

No doubt all of these contributed to the outcome. Adam’s perceived sexuality, however, was becoming the more talked about subject. The finals pitted the soulful, straight, conservative, married Christian youth leader versus the flamboyant, gay, Broadway-rocker type. Leading up to the finale, the question among journalists and bloggers was, Is America ready for a gay idol?

Despite many denials from Christians and other fans of the show that sexual orientation was not an issue in their preference, we still see an awful lot of the following. This is an (unedited) example by one who was listed as White Pride 71 on MSN’s American Idol Message Board:

This is American Idol! Kris should have won. He has the great american values. He is someone parents will be happy to have their kids look up to. And most important he can really sing, not just yell and scream. If adam (alice) wanted to win he (she) should have kept his boyfriend at home and in the closet! But no he wanted to shove his queer devil lifestyle into our faces. Now he has learned that America does not want that fairy boy as a idol!

Did homophobia bring Adam down? It was a combination of reasons, but clearly homophobia was among them.

Party Poopers

More Dems must get on board if we are to achieve progress.

By Steve Charing

It’s not that often in recent history that the Democratic Party would have so much dominance at both the Federal and state levels. And they achieved that status mainly by default.

The Republicans of late have been in a free-fall with no signs of reversal in the near future. The incompetence and hard-line dogma of the Bush-Cheney years have exacerbated the dwindling popularity of the GOP especially since the time they chose to invade Iraq without any provocation.

Then the economy faltered big time and the GOP response was the knee-jerk demand for tax cuts—their panacea for all of our economic ills. Throw into the mix the religious conservatives’ requirement imposed on Republican elected officials that they maintain rigid opposition to choice and same-sex marriage despite the public’s evolving mood on these.

Only a quarter of Americans now identify as Republicans, and that number is about to get worse as more African-Americans, Latinos and younger people become eligible to vote and replace the older, more conservative voters down the road. The GOP will continue to be essentially a white, Southern, evangelical party.

Will this shift from a strong two-party system help us to achieve LGBT rights? On the surface one would think it could. Democrats have always been more sensitive to our issues and the last bastion of moderate Republicans tends to be supportive. But we have problems within the Democratic Party, and that’s problems with a “P” and that stands for “Pastor.”

To be sure, there are conservative Democrats such as Maryland Senate President Thomas V. Mike Miller who oppose civil unions, much less same-sex marriage, and skittish Democrats like Governor Martin O’Malley. But the key to achieve partner recognition and legal protections for transgendered individuals resides at the pulpits of African-American ministers who are overwhelmingly Democrats.

A number of Democratic African-American lawmakers are either ministers themselves or have strong ties to black preachers. Virtually every poll indicates that African-Americans oppose same-sex marriage at a significantly higher rate than the rest of the population. They tend to be religious and socially conservative, and their ministers denounce homosexuality from the pulpits using the very same Bible that at one time was used to justify slavery and racial segregation.

This is not helpful. Senator Anthony C. Muse (D-Prince George’s) and a pastor in his own right, has been seen by lgbt activists as an impediment to pushing the Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act out of the Judicial Proceedings Committee in addition to his apparent opposition to transgender protections.

Delegate Emmett C. Burns (D-10, Baltimore County) [pictured], also a pastor, has been a vocal, unapologetic opponent of lgbt rights. He doesn’t want to see gays “sashay” to the alter. Accordingly, he earned a fat 0 out of 100 from Equality Maryland’s legislative LGBT-rights scoring system.

Delegate Frank Conaway, Jr., a Democrat, whose district 30 includes such LGBT-populous areas as Hampden, Remington, Mount Vernon and Charles Village incredibly said that allowing civil marriage for gays and lesbians will open the floodgates to the state having to recognize polygamy. After some letters and phone calls from angry LGBT constituents and allies, he apologized.

Nonetheless, during the 2009 General Assembly, Del. Conaway slowed up passage of the inheritance tax bill benefiting same-sex couples by introducing an amendment—later defeated—that would have defined domestic partner as “an individual of the opposite sex with whom another individual has a child in common.”

Even in Washington, D.C., former mayor Marion Barry, who was one of the early gay rights supporters, did an about face by voting against a bill in the City Council that would recognize the marriages of same-sex couples. “All hell is going to break loose,” Barry predicted. “We may have a civil war. The black community is just adamant against this.”

Despite Barry’s pronouncement, this is not to suggest that Democrats opposing our rights are all African-Americans or that all blacks are against us. Sen. Brian Frosh (D-Montgomery), for example, was the chair of the Judicial Proceedings Committee this session that bottled up the Transgender Anti-Discrimination Bill by not allowing an up and down vote in committee where it died.

On the other hand, African-American Senator Nathaniel J. McFadden (D-District 45 in Northeast Baltimore) was once an opponent of gay rights when he was a member of Baltimore’s City Council. Lately, he had stated that the issue of same-sex marriage should not be tied directly to the religious aspects of marriage. Raised as a Southern Baptist, Sen. McFadden explained his position "evolved" and had heard the same arguments before in places where blacks could not marry whites. "Discrimination in any form is unacceptable," he said.

Clearly we must reach out to our opponents to achieve success. And many of them are Democrats. Governor O’Malley and others must display the courage to help lead the fight. African-American preachers need to stop spewing anti-gay venom from the pulpits, recognizing that discrimination at any level is wrong. And Republicans should re-think their intransigent positions on LGBT issues before their party falls off the cliff.

For more discussion about this issue, listen to this NPR program.

Stonewall 40th Anniversary Pride Song

Anti-Gay Bullying is Killing Our Kids

By Steve Charing

South Carroll High School in Sykesville, MD held a "Unity Day" on March 26 to celebrate diversity. Included in the program in front of the entire student body was a presentation on lgbt issues by members of PFLAG that focused on the consequences of hate speech, hateful words and bullying.

To amplify the point, the presentations were followed by students’ writing insulting words on pieces of paper, like ‘faggot," "that’s so gay," "homo," etc. and proceeded to shred these epithets in the hope that the symbolic gestures would lead to permanent eradication of the vile language and the pervasive bullying that continues to exist in schools.

As well received as this demonstration was, apparently not all were happy about the event. A Mt. Airy woman in a letter to Gazette.com called the shredding of paper an "empty gesture" and stating that "words kill" is a "platitude." She wrote, "Words do not kill. Behavior kills."

Oh really?

Recently two suicides related to anti-gay bullying were tragedies that could have been avoided. An 11 year-old boy, Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, hung himself on April 6 in Springfield, MA. His suicide comes about a year after eighth-grader Lawrence King was shot and killed by a fellow student in a California classroom, allegedly because he was gay.

A little over a week later a second suicide—also by hanging—took place in Georgia by fifth-grader, Jaheem Herrera. "He was bullied relentlessly.

They called him gay and a snitch," his stepfather told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution.
"[Jaheem's best friend] said, 'He told me that he’s tired of everybody always messing with him in school. He is tired of telling the teachers and the staff, and they never do anything about the problems. So, the only way out is by killing himself.' "

Although neither student identified as gay, both students endured anti-lgbt bullying until they couldn’t take it anymore. And in both cases, the schools did not act on complaints.
Ironically, the suicides occurred in a month in which schools around the country participate in "Day of Silence" events to draw attention to bullying in the schools.

This effort has been promulgated by GLSEN—the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network. A leader in anti-bullying education, GLSEN presents statistics that show how acute bullying is in schools—especially against LGBT students.

In a 2007 National School Climate Survey, 86.2% of LGBT students reported being verbally harassed, 44.1% reported being physically harassed and 22.1% reported being physically assaulted at school in the past year because of their sexual orientation. 73.6% heard derogatory remarks such as "faggot" or "dyke" frequently or often at school.

More than half (60.8%) of students reported that they felt unsafe in school because of their sexual orientation, and more than a third (38.4%) felt unsafe because of their gender expression. 31.7% of LGBT students missed a class and 32.7% missed a day of school in the past month because of feeling unsafe, compared to only 5.5% and 4.5%, respectively, of a national sample of secondary school students.

These numbers cannot be ignored.

"Anti-LGBT bullying affects all students, gay and straight alike," says GLSEN Executive Director Eliza Byard, Ph.D. "Bullies learn from an early age that anti-lgbt language is one of the most effective ways to torment their peers. And far too often, schools fail to address the problem."

GLSEN proposes a four-pronged approach to address anti-lgbt bullying and harassment. They recommend that schools adopt a comprehensive anti-bullying policy that includes in the categories sexual orientation and gender identity and expression.

They encourage required training so that school staff can be well equipped to respond to anti-gay name-calling, bullying and harassment in an effective and timely manner.

GLSEN supports student efforts, such as establishing Gay-Straight Alliances in the schools to help prevent anti-gay bullying.

And lastly, GLSEN recommends that age-appropriate, inclusive curricula be instituted to help students understand and respect difference within the school community and society as a whole.

"These two tragedies highlight the need for schools to do more to make sure their hallways and classrooms are safe for all students," says Byard. "Education, community and federal leaders need to come together and find solutions to the endemic problem of bullying in America’s schools. We owe it to our children to do everything we can to make sure they are safe in school."

Otherwise, young lives are being cut way too short.

Parenting a Trans Child (Special Guest Post)

By a Parent of a 15 year-old Trans Child

You have no idea
When you bring that beautiful little bundle home, you have no idea what surprises it will bring. Listen and watch and allow. Gender identity and fluidity start to show up very early. Separate sexual orientation and gender identity in your head. They are different. We saw our child’s actions as behavioral choices that needed to be addressed for his safety. We did not get that his behavior was a matter of gender identification and self-expression. And this early misunderstanding caused a great deal of pain.

It’s unfortunate that gender identity can surface right along with the terrible 2s. Because we saw much of his behavior as willful, we actively discouraged his variant self-expression, and with the full support and help of a psychologist who obviously did not understand gender identity.

By the time he was six, my happy baby had become so angry and hurt, he threatened suicide. Back to the mental health profession we went. This time he was diagnosed with anxiety. A correct diagnosis, but another missed opportunity to identify and support his gender variance.
The key is this: You cannot make your child more comfortable with one gender or another.

That’s already been done. It’s built into the brain. Designed by God. The only power you have as parents is also the most important, and that is the power to make your child feel comfortable and celebrated or embarrassed and shameful.

Get ready for preschool, bullies and well-intentioned adults
Be upfront with providers. Tell the day care manager the truth and that you expect full support. Educate those who will care for your child. Bring resources; contact PFLAG to give a presentation. If you get resistance, find a new provider. You have more power here than you will ever have in public schools. Use it and enjoy it.

Bullies, if they haven’t already, will come out in preschool and will be an active and hurtful part of your and your child’s life, probably forever. Just as the parents of minority children teach their kids how to navigate in a world full of bigotry, you will too. From overt hate crimes to subtle, pernicious two-faced false support, you, your family and most especially your child will see it all. Do what you can to protect your child. More importantly, do what you can to prepare your child to deal with it.

If you haven’t already, you will now find adults who will attempt to "teach" your child the proper, acceptable behavior for his or her gender. This will range from frightening to punishing or even threatening. The most egregious of these well-intentioned adults are the sports coaches. They are the only adults still allowed to bully our children. Don’t tolerate it. One of the most important gifts I gave my son was lambasting a coach who was trying to "toughen him up" with verbal and emotional abuse.

Marital health and managing the great divide
If there exists a set of parents who agree on how to raise the most mainstream and conforming child, I have yet to meet them. The stress of raising a child with gender variance can and does rip families apart. One study claims 40% of trans kids are kicked out or run away. Don’t try to do this alone: PFLAG, therapy, support groups, good friends, a stiff drink once in a while. Use them all. Guard against sacrificing either your child or your marriage. You don’t have to understand or agree with your spouse. You do have to keep the child out of the middle, and you do have to treat everyone with respect and demand they do the same. A safe and nurturing childhood is a precious thing, and it must be protected. A healthy marriage is also a precious thing, something to last long after the children are grown and gone.

Schools, teachers and guidance counselors
I thank God that we have the dedicated educators and guidance counselors that work in our schools as part of the village that is raising my child. They are some of the most caring and hard-working professionals. But you have to be prepared: the system is bigger and more powerful than the individuals in it.

We found an undercurrent of bigotry painted over socially correctness. I don’t mean to be critical. I don’t think any individual has meant to be hurtful. I think we live in a binary society, and I think teachers, coaches and students don’t understand. I doubt that gender variance is part of their training. They mean well; they love kids. But until you get educated on this issue, you’ll likely do more harm than good.

Finding providers educated on gender
Telling your story. Again and again. That’s what it takes. By the time puberty came along and gender arose again in our house, we were in the hands of a wonderful therapist who recommended we see someone with experience. We had decided to put my son on puberty blockers, so I was looking for two trans-friendly providers: a psychologist and an endocrinologist.

The search was far more painful and difficult than it should have been. I started with our pediatrician, who had never encountered this before, so he wanted to learn more. That led him to the head of pediatric endocrinology at the state university medical system, who told him that my kid needed be in the care of a psychologist and a team to help him. But he could not recommend one. Nor did he offer to research to find someone.

Meanwhile, our family therapist had recommended two providers in the next city. Both were fully booked. They gave me more names of people who gave me more names. And I told my story, again and again. Finally we found a psychologist in our city, but he didn’t get teens and transition issues. Next provider was an hour away, but he had experience with trans kids. He is working out, and is helping our kid find his way through this. Then came the search for an endocrinologist. The first one, also an hour away, did not take insurance and wanted $400 for the initial consultation, with no guarantee to treat my kid. Finally I found one in our city. He charges me a $10 copay, and treats me and my son with respect.

Safety and decision-making
Get real and get there fast. The statistics are against you. Your child is at higher risk for depression, suicide, alcohol and drug abuse, violence and premature death. Your job is to make sure your kid knows how to be safe. Make sure your kid knows about hate crimes. Make sure he or she never goes out without friends near by. Alone is vulnerable. During the teen years, be so careful of parties. Be so careful of drinking. Booze makes for bad decision-making. Parties and high-testosterone sporting events need to be attended with caution. I am not saying lock your child in a closet. I am saying be careful and teach your child how to be.

Finally, hold yourself gently
Raising a child who is trans or gender variant is difficult. It’s scary. It’s more than you bargained for. It’ll likely be more than you comprehend. So please hold yourself gently. Forgive yourself for not knowing; for not understanding. Hold your spouse gently. But mostly hold your child gently, so very gently. Because the world will not, even if it’s just the world of preschool and play dates. And finally, if you are involved with a family on this journey, if you’re a teacher or an administrator or a provider, please be gentle; please be kind; please get educated. You simply have no idea how much it will mean to them.

The Legislature's Trans-gression

The General Assembly shamefully failed to act on transgender protections.

By Steve Charing

The just concluded 2009 Maryland General Assembly grappled with a slew of thorny issues. Lawmakers faced contentious debates on such matters as the death penalty, saving the Preakness, public utilities, the state’s precarious fiscal situation and many more. They even managed to squeeze in the passage of speed cameras "near" school zones and construction sites during the 90-day legislative session.

But a bill to outlaw discrimination in employment and housing on the basis of gender identity and expression never saw the light of day. As was the case last year, it died in committee.

Despite placing a high priority on this important piece of legislation by Equality Maryland—the state’s principal LGBT advocacy organization—and the multi-faceted strategy it employed to make this bill advance and succeed, it appeared that it was doomed from the outset.

Equality Maryland laid much of the blame for the failure of the measure on Senator Brian Frosh (D-Montgomery County), the liberal chairman of the Senate Judicial Proceedings Committee for not allowing the bill to come up for a vote when he had the power to do so.

Does Sen. Frosh truly believe that transgendered individuals should be discriminated against? I doubt it. Moreover, a transgender anti-discrimination bill had passed in his own Montgomery County.

But the way Senate politics are played, legislators who have aspirations for rising to leadership positions generally have to tow the line. And when the current Senate president, Thomas V. "Mike" Miller (pictured)—the longest serving leader of a state legislature in the nation and hence one of the true powerful forces—does not want a bill to come to the floor for a vote, a would-be successor not only must tow the line, he most certainly cannot cross it.

Political observers theorized that Brian Frosh may have eschewed an up-and-down vote in committee for that very reason.

People are still uncomfortable about transgendered individuals. Accordingly, many politicians are as well. Trans-issues are not as easy to explain to folks in the way that being gay or lesbian can be explained, although there remains an incredible amount of education needed on that front.

The arguments surrounding transgender protections render the issue contentious, and according to Dan Furmansky, former Equality Maryland executive director who was a legislative consultant during the session, "Key Democratic leaders view it as a political issue too hot to handle rather than an opportunity to address pervasive bias against a group of individuals who truly need anti-discrimination protections."

To be sure, Republican committee members tried to attach dubious amendments to the bill and Sen. Frosh claimed he was waiting for the House of Delegates to act first. Furthermore, "public accommodations" was stripped from the original bill to make it more palatable to waffling legislators. But this was pure gamesmanship, and the never-ending pursuit of political cover in the absence of courage won out at the final bell.

In my interview with Dan Furmansky, he noted that "Sen. President Miller is generally known as Democratic Party-power focused, not issue focused… He is concerned about what is politically palatable for the Democratic Party…I think [pro-LGBT] advancements are possible during his tenure if he believes it is ‘time.’"

But when will that be, if at all?

The time was clearly not now, as Mike Miller did not want to bring this issue for a vote primarily because of the controversial nature of it. And Brian Frosh complied.

The upshot of this political cowardice is that a transgendered person can be fired from his or her job simply because of who the person is even though it has nothing to do with work performance. A transgendered person can be kicked out of his or her apartment for simply being trans. Alas, discrimination is still alive and well in the free state of Maryland.

Many transgendered people struggle in trying to reconcile their mind with their birth body. They are more at risk for homelessness, poverty, bullying, suicide, victims of violence and other forms of discrimination than the remainder of the LGBTcommunity.

Yet I believe the elected officials overestimated the backlash if such a measure passed. Governor Martin O’Malley would have likely signed the bill into law as he sent letters of support to both committees involved and signed a similar law as Mayor of Baltimore.

In 2009, I’m banking on the fact that less and less people are inclined to allow discrimination to take hold in this very blue state. More grassroots efforts are required, though, to educate a public not familiar with trans-issues and ultimately the politicians will follow.

And to avoid yet another trans-gression, more sympathetic candidates should be sought to run against our opponents.

OUT on the Springboard

Towson University diver is making a splash for LGBT rights.

By Steve Charing

Bradley Bolin is flexible when it comes to wardrobe. When he joined forces with other students demonstrating against the homophobic Topeka, Kansas-based Westboro Baptist Church who picketed Towson (Maryland) High School, he was armed with several ensembles.

Rambling down the hill from the campus of Towson University to mix with the counter-protesters on York Road, Bradley toted a gym bag containing several outfits so he can switch off according to the fickle weather on a blustery early spring afternoon, while at the same time presenting several “looks.”

He initially wore a robin’s egg blue T-shirt with the line, “gay? fine by me.” As the sun tried to peek from behind the clouds, Bradley switched to a snug, dark blue tank top with the word “PITCHER” and a caricature of a left-handed baseball pitcher underneath. (His friend Zack wore the reciprocal “CATCHER” version.) As the chilly breezes took over, Bradley gave in to the elements and slipped on a gray jacket over the tank top.

But Bradley’s flexibility isn’t restricted to fashion. He makes good use of his lithe build and athletic skills as a diver on the Towson University Tigers swimming and diving team, and quite an accomplished one at that.

Bradley Bolin, who will be celebrating his 21st birthday in May, began his diving exploits five years ago in California at the end of his sophomore year in high school. He graduated as sixth in his high school region. In his freshman year at Towson University he was Rookie of the Year for his team, Rookie Diver of the Year in his conference, and Rookie Athlete of the Year for the entire school.

He also was named the Colonial Athletic Association Diver of the Week award this past November with wins in the 1- and 3-meter springboard events. It marked the first such honor for the Towson men’s team of the season.

Unlike many collegiate athletes who happen to be gay, and unlike his hero, Olympic diving champion Greg Louganis who was in the closet during the time he was competing, Bradley is out and proud. And not only is he openly gay, he is vigorously trying to pursue equal rights for all members of the LGBT community.

“I began being an ‘activist’ when I helped start the Gay-Straight Alliance in my first high school in Fairbanks, Alaska, my freshman year,” he points out. “Although in my mind I wasn't being an ‘activist’ I was just trying to create a safe space for LGBT students and perhaps make my school feel like a safer, more accepting place.”

When he moved to Southern California following his sophomore year, he attended another high school that did not have a GSA. So he launched one there as well.

“I think I was more politically ‘active’ when I moved to California because that is when I started doing more off-campus outreach. I helped coordinate the LA AIDS Walk during my junior and senior years. But all four years I participated in the Day of Silence by turning my body into a piece of walking art and refused to speak on behalf of all of those who have been silenced.”

He wasn’t silenced during the anti-Westboro Church demonstration. His experiences with trying to establish a GSA at his high schools set the stage for his presence and support for the students at Towson High School. “Now that I’m in college I want to show my support for the youth and try to do something that’s right,” he says with passion.

The junior, political science-economics double major is out to his diving teammates and to the whole school for that matter. This has historically been a dicey decision for LGBT collegiate athletes and one where few have shown such courage. Undaunted, Bradley Bolin, who is the secretary of Towson University’s Queer Student Union, has taken the plunge, so to speak, and had no such qualms about being himself.

“I couldn't ask for a more supportive team,” he says, acknowledging that nobody on the team, male and female, cares that he’s gay. “They see me as ‘Bradley the diver,’ not ‘Bradley the gay.’” He has one other teammate who is openly gay.

However, Bradley explains that there have been a few instances where people have made ignorant comments, but usually people quickly rally to his defense if he doesn’t get to the insulting party first!

“Granted I am not only out but I am one of the more visible people on the team simply based on my personality and I kind of stick out like a sore thumb,” Bradley admits.

He rejects the stereotype about swimming and diving teams’ being gay. “Most of the team just think it is funny/stupid that people assume that the whole team has queer tendencies just because of me.”

Bradley states that being on the diving team is like being part of a family, and he credits his coaching staff for fostering such an accepting environment. In fact, his coach, Maureen Mead, recruited him to come to Maryland.

Coach Mead says she is lucky Bradley chose Towson out of all the schools he could have picked. “He is an unbelievably, talented diver and team member,” she explains. “Even when he was a younger member of the team he acted as a mentor to his teammates.”

Bradley points out, “Our coaching staff does a great job by enforcing the idea of team unity, and I think that is a huge factor in how great our team supports each other. Plus, people on our team are judged by their merits and actions, not their sexuality.”

Nonetheless, Bradley still encounters the occasional “that’s so gay” and “fag” during conversations. But he points out that generally people catch themselves and apologize “profusely.”

“This irritates me a little because I wonder whether or not they are just apologizing because I am around or because they are genuinely sorry.” He is sincerely concerned about the effects of such remarks have on others.

“I am secure with myself enough to know that I am a good person, but the people who aren't out are the ones I worry for,” Bradley asserts. “I worry that when those people hear such negative words coming from people, especially their friends, they are going to continue to think that something is wrong with them. I don't fight against hate for myself, I fight against hate for those who cannot fight for themselves.”

It is that team-first attitude, whether it be in or out of the pool, that has characterized Bradley Bolin’s young but fulfilling life. As such, he rates high marks just like his frequent rip entries into the water below.

Lousy Leadership Marginalizes GOP

Letter Published in the

April 9 Issue of the Baltimore Sun

Paul West is suggesting that the luster may be coming off the Democratic Party and that the GOP could be making a comeback so soon after the 2008 election ("Washington watches for the Democratic tide to start ebbing," April 4).

In doing so, West ignores the fact that polls continue to show that party affiliation strongly favors the Democrats and the same could be said about the effectiveness of fundraising efforts.

Moreover, and perhaps more importantly, the trend for young voters continues to move towards the Democratic Party, which solidifies their election chances for years to come.

And one cannot brush off the lack of leadership within the Republican Party as West appears to have done. After eight years of Bush-Cheney at the helm, the GOP is frantically searching for a leader that can appeal to voters beyond the Southern and evangelical base. So far, no one with those credentials has emerged.

Steve Charing

Clarksville, MD

Youth Are Showing Us the Way

By Steve Charing

The burst of energy displayed by the young people who participated in the protest of the homophobic, Kansas-based Westboro Baptist Church on March 30 was breathtaking. They demonstrated against the Fred Phelps-led hatemongers who had marked Towson High School for its Diversity Club and Gay-Straight Alliance. Phelps, himself, was absent, but a handful of his family members brandishing absurd, hate-filled slogans on their familiar placards did the deed.

Aside from students from the targeted school, kids from other high schools in the area as well as local colleges voiced their opposition to hate. And they did it loud and clear. Even straight "jocks" from Towson High School—a group that in years past wouldn’t ordinarily be expected to join forces with the pro-LGBT demonstrators—supported the cause openly.

While other groups participated, such as PFLAG, church organizations and an assortment of adults bent on social justice, the youth stole the show. They enthusiastically cheered at each passing car that honked its horn in support. They shouted down the Westboro clan on the other side of York Road. They publicly voiced their opposition against hate and expressed their affirmation towards love and equality. They support gay rights in all forms and did so with fervor.

All told, around 300 people overwhelmed the 6 Westboro crazies both in numbers and passion.

Back in November, there was a nationwide protest of the passage of Proposition 8 in California. Locally, a thousand people gathered outside Baltimore’s City Hall on a rain-threatened Saturday to plea for marriage equality and express their outrage aimed at the California results (photo).

There were many adults there to be sure, and a significant number of them were straight allies. But there were also plenty of college students who descended upon the War Memorial Plaza in clusters from all directions like an invading army. Waving colorful hand-made posters displaying pointed messages, these youthful protestors surprised even veterans of demonstrations of yore with their verve and commitment.

The center of gravity for LGBT politics and activism is steadily shifting to the youth. This is not just manifested by the increasing number of young LGBT people who are coming out at a faster rate than in previous generations. It has been bolstered by an astounding number of youth who simply shrug off the existence of LGBT people as no big deal.

Although much of these changing attitudes by straight youth can be attributed to their expanding exposure to lgbt peers, the more welcoming culture with which these people are in tune, reinforces their beliefs. For example, the role MTV has played for the past two decades in enlightening the youth of this country concerning LGBT issues cannot be understated.

The network’s programs routinely depict LGBT youth as ordinary people with the same family, social, economic and psychological issues facing all teenagers. This season’s run of Real World was so well done, that in the show’s later episodes, it was difficult to notice that the "house" included a gay man, a bisexual woman and a transgendered woman living with five straight peers.

The gay element eventually played a subordinate role when other weighty matters took over, like how one of the cast members was facing an uncertain future as he was recalled for another tour of duty in Iraq.

As the episodes rolled along each week, the ultimate conflicts weren’t between gay and straight and straight and transgender or even gay and transgender; they existed among each other regardless of who they were. Gay, bisexual, transgender? Oh yeah, so what.

This is the attitude that is prevailing among young people today. A straight kid may argue with a gay kid, but odds are, it has nothing to do with sexuality. Conflicts centered on sexual orientation do exist, of course, but to a lesser degree.

Of course, there still are incidents of bullying and epithets like "that’s so gay" in schools. But the trend is definitely moving in a favorable direction.

Politicians would be smart to take notice of these shifting attitudes. The youth have been swelling the voter ranks and affecting elections. The Obama phenomenon brought more young people into the political process than any time since the 1960’s.

Elected officials who experience trepidation about supporting equality based on gender identity or are skittish about conferring rights to same-sex couples are doing so at their peril. The old-time attitudes are dying off. The new generation of kids—gay and straight—will show us the way and those backward-thinking politicians the door.

Hundreds Protest Anti-gay Church

By Steve Charing

TOWSON, MD—An hour before the planned protest by representatives of the Westboro Baptist Church on March 30, there was relative quiet. An occasional airplane flew overhead, and the sound of the chilly wind gusts whipping through the leafless branches of the trees that surround Towson High School briefly interrupted the serenity.

The thousand or so students at the 60 year-old, brick and stone, 3-story structure were still in their classes anticipating the final bell. But it was not a normal school day on this particular Monday.

Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka, Kansas, which is notorious for its anti-gay, anti-American vitriol and led by its patriarch flame-thrower, Fred Phelps, chose Towson High School to unleash its toxic venom.

The extremist group targeted this school because, like so many other schools around the country, it has a gay-straight alliance or GSA. It also boasts a diversity club, and a website that emphasizes tolerance and diversity as part of the school’s mission statement.

When officials at Towson High learned of the impending Westboro protest, the school sought to minimize the students’ exposure to the predicted taunts and insults shouted at them by the extremists. School officials prepared the students and parents with a letter. Club meetings and sports practices were rearranged so that as many students as possible would not exit the building at the time of the Westboro demonstration.

Moreover, Baltimore County police were in full force and did not permit any demonstration within a few blocks of the school. The Westboro clan was forced to protest at the intersection of York Road and Hillside Avenue, so exiting students did not have to hear any rants that said they are doomed to hell and other such epithets.

In the meanwhile, counter-protests were being planned by a variety of groups. Among those were the Central Baltimore County Democratic Club, the new Baltimore County chapter of PFLAG, Bel Air Unitarian and The Presbytery of Baltimore.

In addition, area schools, such as Towson High School, Dulaney, Carver, and Friends School, as well as Towson University and Goucher College mobilized anti-hate demonstrators to protest the Westboro demonstration.

The six weary-looking Westboro bunch did their thing for over a half-hour. They paraded along the prescribed area carrying their usual assortment of scathing messages on sticks while under the watchful eyes of the police and Silent Witness—a group carrying rainbow umbrellas—who also acted as a peaceful buffer.

The pro-LGBT crowd on the other side of York Road was building with each passing minute. Many carried hand-made signs decrying hate and advocating unity and love. Students from nearby Towson University, an assortment of religious groups and curious onlookers joined the ranks and signaled their support for the anti-Westboro demonstrators. They lined the side of the road, for at least a two-block length.

This is what the Westboro group wanted: a reaction so strong that the media would cover it and give attention to their unpopular cause.

Marilyn, a member of PFLAG-Baltimore County who has a gay family member, hopes that the overwhelming opposition to the Westboro clan would help get rid of them. "Goodness, I hope that we are able to drive groups like this away from our whole country," she said. "We have to be here to respond to their hate. It’s evil, and we don’t want people to hear their message."

With each passing car that honked its horn in support of the counter-demonstrators on busy York Road, and there were scores of them, the mainly young crowd cheered loudly.

Bradley Bolin, the secretary of the Towson University Queer Student Union and a junior, was emboldened by the turnout. He mentioned that when he was in high school and he tried to start a GSA, he didn’t receive the level of support he would have liked from the community and local colleges. "Now that I’m in college I want to show my support for the youth and try to do something that’s right."

Bradley acknowledged that anti-protests give Westboro Baptist Church what they want. "I’m not concerned with what they want. I’m more concerned about the youth and what THEY want," he explained. "I want to stand up for the people who can’t fight by themselves."

As the Westboro group was nearing the end of their allotted time, amidst the honking horns and competing chants, a surge of Towson High School students eventually showed up following dismissal. These new forces swelled the crowd to near 300 according to some estimates.

"They [Westboro Baptist Church] have the right to protest," said Charlie, a senior at the school and is straight. "But nobody in the school supports their beliefs."

Joey, a straight junior at the school supports gay people and opposes those who spread hatred. Mike, also a junior and a member of the school’s wrestling team, says he has gay friends, and several of his fellow teammates joined in the counter-demonstration.

Another Towson High student Beth said "I don’t care what sex you like, everybody is equal and God loves everybody."

Hannah, who is also straight, says "Love is beautiful, and I don’t think anyone should protest against it. I knew there would be so many protesters on our side, but not their side."

And that certainly was the case on this otherwise chilly, quiet Monday.

A Thousand Times, No!

It is clear why the Republican Party has diminished to the extent it has. Even when they had bad ideas (which is most of the time) they at least had ideas!

Now, shell-shocked by two consecutive disasterous election cycles, they are floundering, leaderless and lost; their main playbook consists of the unpatriotic hope for President Obama to fail (Limbaugh, Jindal and the like) and just saying "no" to everything, regardless of merit. The "Party of No" indeed.

No to the stimulus. No to the bailouts. No to Obama's budget. No to common sense.

Alternatives? Hmm. No!

Yesterday, the GOP was to roll out an alternative budget. April Fools Day showed up a week early. Sorry, no numbers, just a "blueprint." The "deer in the headlights" look of Rep. John Boehner when asked by a correspondent from the conservative National Review where the details were was telling. The confused, irritated and vapid reponse by Boehner symbolized exactly the state of the GOP.

A promised alternative budget with no numbers, projections, trends, charts is incredible. Just typical GOP ideological bunk about smaller government: tax cuts, deficits, etc. Except for the tax cuts for the wealthy, these principles were no-shows over the past eight years.

As long as they continue to become a laughing stock, with these PR snafus, Joe the Plumber positing on economic policy, and with Michael Steele at the helm of the RNC, the GOP will remain the Party of No-- to voters.

Window of Opportunity

As the GOP reels, the time to secure LGBT rights is sooner rather than later.

By Steve Charing

Much has been debated recently among LGBT activists regarding the timing of pro-LGBT initiatives that can be undertaken by the Democratic-controlled Congress and an ostensibly gay-friendly president.

Should President Barack Obama expend political capital now, while he’s popular, to pursue key LGBT legislation? Or, should he defer these bold, challenging moves until he accumulates a larger cache of IOUs?

Such measures would entail a repeal of "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" and the Defense of Marriage Act. It would also involve a push for an all-inclusive federal employment non-discrimination legislation (ENDA) and adding sexual orientation and gender identity to a comprehensive hate crimes bill.

Right now, the president remains popular with polls generally indicating that 60 to 70 percent of the American people approve of his job performance. They also, by large numbers, have a great deal of confidence in Mr. Obama despite his rocky first two months in office highlighted by a sinking economy and his desire to spend its way out of the muck.

Couple that with the unabated plunging of the Republican Party. The GOP is essentially leaderless and bankrupt of any ideas. They are losing the PR war by being effectively (and accurately) portrayed as the "Party of No." There have been dust-ups between recently elected Republican National Committee chair Michael Steele and the blustery but influential radio blowhard, Rush Limbaugh, as well as other key players within the party.

People around the U.S. and the world, for that matter, cringe at the nightmarish notion that if fortunes were reversed, John McCain would be floundering in an attempt to figure the way out of the economic morass. Sarah Palin, as vice-president, would be supervising an economic stimulus to nowhere with a chronic chorus of "Thanks, but no thanks." And the Secretary of the Treasury would be none other than the potential Nobel Prize winner in Economics (in his mind, at least) Joe the Plumber. Yikes!

It’s no wonder the good folks of America will continue provide President Obama with a very long leash to see this mess through. He has already accumulated a ton of good will, as evidenced by the gaudy poll results. And the alternative is downright frightening.

However, if history has taught us anything, nothing lasts forever. Mr. Obama could stumble as the economy tumbles more. He could be accused of allowing "bonus-gate" to erode an already low trajectory for consumer confidence. There could be an international crisis—somewhere, anywhere. Patience could easily wear thin. Joe Biden, God love him, could stand before a bank of microphones. Anything can happen that could derail this presidency.

That is why I conclude that the President and Congress should act swiftly on these LGBT initiatives. Indeed, a bill has been introduced in Congress by Rep. Ellen Tauscher (D-CA) to repeal "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell." Moreover, a lawsuit by Major Margaret Witt is challenging the Air Force's attempt to discharge her under the policy. Observers see this as the rubber meeting the road for the President; he must weigh in on the issue now, as events will have forced his hand.

Barack Obama has promised support for the other key lgbt issues during his campaign, and we should be confident he will come through for us. He started off on the right foot by agreeing to formally endorse a United Nations declaration calling for an end to discrimination and other human rights abuses based on sexual orientation and gender identity. The action reversed President Bush’s refusal to sign off on the statement—the only Western country not to do so.

The President’s sway in Congress will, of course, be determined not just by poll numbers, but also by his ability to build consensus within the Democratic Party and reach across the aisle.
President Obama has already demonstrated that he can walk and chew gum at the same time.

While the economy is and should remain on the front burner, the President has delved into other issues that he sees as major components of his agenda, such as energy, health care and education.

That effort should continue with the LGBT matters that have been languishing in Congress for years, and in some cases, decades. Fear of being perceived as pro-gay has handcuffed many in Congress for too long.

This is a new day in America, however. We have a popular, compassionate and intelligent President who doesn’t flinch at accepting responsibility unlike his horrific predecessor.

Surveys continue to show increasing support for LGBT rights, especially in employment and in the military, so Congress ought to "man up" for a change and take on these important LGBT initiatives.

And Mr. Obama should use his current positive standing with the American people to promote and support LGBT non-discrimination now because who knows how long the window of opportunity will remain open?

Report Says Gays, Lesbians Poorer than Straights

By Steve Charing

Dispelling the myth that gays and lesbians are more affluent than the general population, a report issued on March 20 by the UCLA School of Law’s Williams Institute asserts that the opposite is true.

The study undertaken by the LGBT-focused think-tank found that after "adjusting for a range of family characteristics that help explain poverty," same-sex couples are "significantly" more likely to be poor than opposite-sex married couples.

"We find clear evidence that poverty is at least as common in the lesbian, gay and bisexual population as among heterosexual people and their families." This refutes "a popular stereotype (that) paints lesbians and gay men as an affluent elite," according to the study’s report.

The Williams Institute compiled their findings by reviewing data from the 2000 U.S. Census and two smaller surveys that included questions on sexual orientation. It is the first comprehensive study to analyze poverty among gay and lesbian couples.

This report, titled "Poverty in the Lesbian, Gay and Bisexual Community," does not cover transgender individuals because they could not be identified from the data reviewed. Nonetheless, at least eleven previous studies concluded that transgender people, who face significant job discrimination, are more likely to have very low income.

The study’s findings pre-date the current recession and conclude that: 1) lesbian couples have much higher poverty rates than either different-sex couples or gay male couples; 2) children in gay and lesbian couple households have poverty rates twice those of children in heterosexual married couple households; and 3) within the LGB population, several groups are much more likely to be poor than others. African-American people in same-sex couples and same-sex couples who live in rural areas are much more likely to be poor than white or urban same-sex couples.

Moreover, the study finds that while a small percentage of all families receive government cash supports intended for poor and low-income families, gay and lesbian individuals and couples are more likely to receive these supports than are heterosexuals since they tend to lack spousal benefits.

Children of same-sex couples do not fare well either. "While one in ten children of married couples are poor, one in five children living with a same-sex couple are living below the poverty level," says the report.

Among the reasons for the higher poverty levels among LGBT couples cited by the Williams Institute are: 1) LGBT vulnerability to employment discrimination, with no legal recourse in most states; 2) most same-sex couples are shut out of some institutions that enhance the economic position of families, such as marriage; 3) lesbian, gay, and bisexual people are more likely than heterosexuals to lack health insurance coverage, making them vulnerable to the economic consequences of a health crisis; 4) LGBT families are less likely to receive family support, which could translate into greater economic vulnerability; and 5) family conflict about coming out and violence in group homes results in high rates of homelessness for young LGBT people.

To help alleviate poverty among the LGBT population, the report recommends passage of ENDA—the Federal Employment Non-discrimination Act, granting of the right to marry or at least to a "meaningful legal status" like civil unions, and to shore up "holes" in the safety net.

"The misleading myth of affluence steers policymakers, community organizations, service providers, and the media away from fully understanding poverty among LGBT people or even imagining that poor LGBT people exist," the report states.

To read the full report, visit www.law.ucla.edu/williamsinstitute/home.html.

Guerilla Gay Bar Baltimore Rocks On

By Steve Charing

It was certainly peaceful as far as invasions go. Around 8:00 p.m. on March 6 there was a handful of gay men clustered together sipping drinks inside Luckie’s Tavern—which is located in Power Plant Live! on Market Place in Baltimore— checking out the entrance to see who else walks through.

As the minutes and hours passed and the beats to rock and 80’s pop tunes permeated in the background, that handful of people evolved into a small crowd, and eventually swelled to over 400 mostly gay men and some women who "invaded" the space normally frequented by straight twenty- and thirtysomethings on a rockin’ Friday night.

What was taking place was the fifth monthly installment of the rapidly growing Guerilla Gay Bar Baltimore phenomenon. Founders of this movement, Byron McFarlane, 25, of Ellicott City and Mark Yost, 28, of Mt. Vernon, (pictured) believed that Baltimore needed an alternative to the conventional bar scene.

"Washington, D.C. has a very large, active, gay community and for gay men and women who are really into the nightlife there are tons of options, including their own Guerrilla Queer Bar," noted McFarlane. That was among several similar groups that sprung up around the country.

"Mark and I always wanted to go to the D.C. gathering, but at one point we just said to each other, ‘Why don't we start one here?’ So the outlet is for everyone who doesn't want to drive an hour to Washington or go to the same old bars in Mt. Vernon," says McFarlane.

Despite the GGBB’s new logo, which depicts a militaristic-looking clenched fist on a bottle cap, both Yost and McFarlane insist that the "guerilla" aspect of GGBB is not an "in-your-face" activity nor are they trying to be confrontational. In fact, the bars that are selected are notified of the invasion and prepare for the volume of additional patrons. The logo is displayed on a sticker that is handed out to all the "invaders" for easy identification as part of the group.

"Our primary goal is to have a good time, but along with that is interacting with crowds many of us don't see very often," says McFarlane.

He adds, "Going to an identifiable gay bar versus a straight bar is different for some people because they aren't really interested in an exclusively gay environment. Others, because they don't have many or any gay friends and prefer to hang out with their straight friends at a straight bar."

Yost sees this as an opportunity to improve the social life in Baltimore but also to expand our exposure to other aspects of the city. "We are trying to help bring a new outlet for socializing to the gay community and also help the gay community experience more of Baltimore together," he says. "There is a benefit of doing it in a large group. Simply put, we may visit these bars, but it’s much easier to be yourself, in a larger group."

And what a large group it is!

The first GGBB event took place in November at Claddagh Pub in Canton and drew about 100. In December they attracted 175 at Mother’s in Federal Hill. Max’s in Fells Point drew 250 as the movement was starting to really catch on. And January’s event saw a stunning throng of over 400 pack Mt. Washington Tavern. A similar number showed up at Luckie’s Tavern.

The basic idea is that people sign up through Facebook and are notified a few days in advance of an announced date of the upcoming invasion of the straight bar.

For Scot Shaffer, his visit to Luckie’s Tavern marked his third GGBB appearance. A bartender at the Hippo, Scot likes the mix of the crowd. "There are different groups of gay people from all over the area, and I love the music," he says.

Another patron, Michael, 25, from Mt. Washington wanted a non-gay bar setting where it’s more relaxing for him. "I don’t have to worry so much about people hitting on me." He brought his straight friend Rachel who also enjoys the atmosphere and just wants to have a great time.
"What is great about this group is that there are lots of gay men and women who don't feel comfortable at gay bars, whether because they are not out or because it just isn't their thing," Byron McFarlane explains.

What about the straight patrons?

Stacie was sitting at a table at Luckie’s with several other straight friends and seemed oblivious to the gay invasion. When told, Stacie chuckled and said, "No wonder there are so many guys here." Her friend Ross of Mt. Washington said it was a cool idea and it certainly did not bother him one bit. Tom, 27, another straight man concurred. "Hey, we’re all here to have some drinks and enjoy ourselves."

"The bartenders, owners, and patrons have been at least accepting, and at best excited to have us," observed McFarlane.

The lack of backlash is noteworthy as GGBB continues to thrive. Mixing peacefully with straight people shows that maybe we’re not to be feared and could help us politically down the road. Says Mark Yost, "The more out we are, the harder it is to demonize our community and make us ‘others.’ I truly believe the greatest strides we will make as a community towards equal rights and acceptance will be from being ourselves, out in the straight world."

The next invasion is set for April 3. For more information about the group, visit http://www.ggb-baltimore.com/

Coping with the Recession

LGBT groups and other non-profits are finding ways to survive the economic downturn

By Steve Charing

These are grim times for everybody. Even if you haven’t been laid off or may not be handed the pink slip in the future, you most likely lost a third to a half of your "wealth" since October if you had money tied up in equities and bonds. Confidence is waning; credit is scarce; money is tight.

In this down economy people will spend on what they truly need or want, and everything else will be deferred until their economic circumstances improve. The same goes for businesses, who must cut costs, as there are fewer customers and of those, they are spending less to purchase their products or services. Cutting costs often entails cutting payroll, and with more people laid off, there are fewer customers and less money to be spent. It’s a vicious cycle.

Consequently, charitable and other non-profit organizations, including lgbt organizations, are likely to feel the pinch in the near future. Those individuals who are in financial straits now or fear such a condition are less likely to donate money to these organizations, and businesses will also hold on to their checkbooks.

As in the case of businesses, non-profit organizations depend on a revenue stream for survival. When revenue targets substantially fall short, they may be compelled to cut staff, cut back in advertising, cut programs and spend less on areas that support their mission.

Fortunately, some local organizations are bracing for the economic slide and have been addressing these challenges. They are actively trying to develop strategies to mitigate the economic pain caused by the recession.

"Like everyone we are concerned about the economic downturn and watching for its effects on Chase Brexton and our patients," says David Shippee, Chief Executive Officer of Chase Brexton Health Services, which maintains several offices and clinics in and around Baltimore. "But the bottom line at CBHS is stable and still in the black, in part, because of our long-standing efforts to assure that our sources of revenue are as diverse as possible."

He points out, however, that there has been a noticeable drop-off in individual and corporate giving. "Most recently as we prepare for our annual CBHS gala we are struggling to get corporate support for the event to come close to the levels we experienced in prior years," notes Shippee.

He states that the economic stimulus package includes some funding for healthcare, but also Obama’s initial budget contains increases for HIV/AIDS care through the Ryan White program and also increased funds going to community health centers to care for the uninsured.

"Although these sources only account for 15% of CBHS's revenue, it is hopeful to know that some relief may be likely in this area. It is too soon to determine how much additional support may be coming our way under these two programs."

Shippee explains that increased public or private dollars to help care for the uninsured becomes even more important in a recession. As more people lose jobs, they also lose their health insurance. Many of them turn to community health centers for care. "In the last year, we have seen a 54% increase in the number of uninsured patients being helped by CBHS. Other health centers in Maryland are also seeing an increase in uninsured patient visits, but their average increase is 20%."

The statewide LGBT civil rights advocacy organization Equality Maryland has not yet felt any adverse impact from the national recession. But they are mindful of it and concerned about potential decreased funding.

Equality Maryland regularly holds two major fundraisers during the course of the year, with the next one being the "Night Out for Equality" on June 7. Their planning committee is looking into ways to attract more supporters.

"We're hosting more low cost ticket events, like Equality Rocks!" says new director of development Kevin Walling. "This past January was a fantastic success both financially and in terms of reaching out to new members. House parties, smaller receptions and member-sponsored events are already in the works for the spring and summer."

Walling said he is open to any suggestions and welcomes more people to get involved. You may call him at 301-587-7500 or e-mail kevin@equalitymaryland.org.

Some of these efforts are paying off. A benefit for Equality Maryland as part of "An Evening with Lily Tomlin" at the Lyric Opera House on April 3 has been sold out. It will include an Equality Maryland-only reception with the headliner being part of the festivities.

Unfortunately, not all LGBT organizations are faring as well, especially some national ones. According to reports in the Washington Blade, several have been forced to take measures to deal with the slowing down of donations. For example, Lambda Legal and GLAAD are among those who needed to cut staff and other costs.

And the Human Rights Campaign, the nation’s largest lgbt advocacy group, was reported to be considering trimming salaries and holding back a cost-of-living increase this year for some employees to help deal with the economic downturn. Phone calls by OUTloud to HRC to obtain a comment were not returned.

The power of fundraising should not be underestimated even in turbulent economic times. Last month the producers of "Wicked" and 4Good Productions held a star-studded "Defying Inequality Concert" at New York’s George Gershwin Theater that attracted over 400 performers and celebrities. The event raised a whopping $400,000, of which $250,000 were donated by the producers and writers of "Wicked."

The stars included Carson Kressley, Harvey Fierstein, Cyndi Lauper, Sally Struthers, Rue McClanahan, "Wicked" composer Stephen Schwartz, Jane Fonda and Keith Olbermann. Cast members from Broadway's "Spring Awakening," "Billy Elliott," "The Lion King," "Mamma Mia," "Gypsy," among others, also performed.

The organizations that benefited from the fundraiser were the Empire State Pride Agenda, Family Equality Council, the Vermont Freedom to Marry Task Force, Equality California and Garden State Equality.

The results from this gala and Equality Maryland’s Lily Tomlin event demonstrate that even with a down economy, the stars still shine and people will pay to see them.

O'Malley's March

The Governor expends political capital demonstrating on behalf of convicted murders. Would he ever march for LGBT equality?

By Steve Charing

When I viewed the peculiar news footage that depicted Governor Martin O’Malley marching down West Street in Annapolis with others in his quest to end the death penalty, I was taken aback. My reaction was, O’Malley is protesting the death penalty in such a public way, but we can’t even get him to commit on same-sex marriage rights for Maryland’s gay and lesbian couples or on transgender protections.

The governor has seen his approval numbers fade since his election victory in 2006. He has had to face serious budget and economic issues where no matter which course of action he decided on, he was roundly criticized. This takes a toll on popularity and hence political capital, and the governor has little left to spend at this point.

But during the current General Assembly, Governor O’Malley made a decision that whatever political capital he has remaining, he was going to use it on repealing the death penalty. He cites his Catholic faith as the basis for his passionate effort to close down the death chamber in Maryland once and for all.

This is not a bad cause to be sure. I had once supported the death penalty believing it as a way to prevent repeat offenders. But I saw the inequities in its application and the potential deadly inaccuracies. And my views on the issue were cemented after reading John Grisham's The Chamber.

Despite Governor O’Malley’s public advocacy for repealing the death penalty, the Senate’s Judicial Proceedings Committee killed the measure. That normally puts the kibosh on the initiative right then and there for the current session. However, Senate President Thomas V. Mike Miller eschewed the procedural protocol and decided to send the bill to the Senate floor for a full vote in deference to Mr. O’Malley’s office.

Of course, Mike Miller, who supports capital punishment, counted the votes in advance and is fully aware that complete repeal won’t pass the Senate. But this grand gesture, disingenuous as it appears, proves that if the governor takes a strong stand on a measure, it might, with help from the mega-powerful Senate president, bypass the usual customs and allow it to come up for a vote by the full Senate.

Contrast the governor’s high profile efforts to repeal the death penalty with his reticence on the major LGBT issues, especially same-sex marriage. Gay activists who overwhelmingly supported Mr. O’Malley’s election bid with votes and cash have been stymied by the governor’s avoidance of the hot-button issue.

Governor O’Malley got off on the wrong foot when immediately following the state’s Appeals Court ruling in September 2007 that upheld the current marriage laws defining marriage as between one man and one woman, he stated on television that "no one should redefine the sacraments."

Many activists, including some of the plaintiffs in the original lawsuit, were rankled by those remarks noting that he clearly knew what was being sought was civil recognition, not religious blessings. Others were miffed at his apparent backtracking of his position since 2004 when he allegedly supported same-sex marriage.

During the 2008 General Assembly, the governor was virtually invisible when the Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act was introduced. The framework of the bill made it clear, mainly to address concerns of the governor and legislators, that civil marriage equality was the goal and that no religious institution would be forced to officiate any marriage ceremony with which they do not agree.

Even with 49 sponsors in tow and the religious concerns ostensibly addressed, the bill died in the Senate Judicial Proceedings Committee. The governor could have made a difference had he chosen to support the measure in earnest.

Governor O’Malley stated during the session that he would sign a civil union bill if one came across his desk. But Equality Maryland, the state’s largest LGBT civil rights organization, decided such a route would be unacceptable and pushed for full marriage equality instead.

Moreover, the governor has yet to publicly offer his support for the Transgender Anti-Discrimination bill, which would add gender identity to existing state law prohibiting discrimination in employment, housing, public accommodations and credit. As mayor of Baltimore, O’Malley signed a similar law in December 2002.

A march down Annapolis streets by Martin O’Malley to support marriage equality and transgender protections is a dream that is unlikely to materialize. Even a surprise visit to the Lobby Day rally last month where he could have addressed the crowd in front of the media on these important civil right issues was do-able and would have been extraordinary.

Former Governor Parris N. Glendening used the political capital he received from his 10-point re-election margin and pushed for legal protections for gays and lesbians. In 2001, he signed into law the historic bill that would prevent discrimination based on sexual orientation.

We were fortunate that Glendening used his political capital for our cause before it rapidly eroded. There doesn’t appear to be enough gas in the political tank for Martin O’Malley to lead both the death penalty fight and advance lgbt rights, not to mention addressing the economic havoc, which is devastating the state. He has already expended his dwindling political capital on behalf of saving the lives of convicted murderers.

To his credit, the governor recently stated his support for a domestic partnership bill for state employees. With other measures needing his backing, will that be enough to get the LGBT community to march with him to the polls?

Photo Credit: Baltimore Sun photo by Glenn Fawcett / February 25, 2009)

Bill to End ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ Introduced

Obama campaigned on its repeal. Will he actively engage?

by Steve Charing

March 2 marked another historic date in the ongoing struggle for lgbt equality. Rep. Ellen Tauscher (D-CA) introduced legislation to repeal "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" to ensure that all qualified Americans can serve openly in the military regardless of sexual orientation.

"This law has failed our country and our military for 15 years," Rep. Tauscher (pictured) said in her announcement. "It harms military readiness and discriminates against patriotic young men and women who want to serve their country. It's time for Congress to right this wrong."

The Military Readiness Enhancement Act will replace the ban with a nondiscrimination policy that will make our military not just more fair, but also more effective, backers say.

Since the advent of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" 15 years ago, over 13,000 service members have been discharged. Many valuable Arabic linguists as well as other gay and lesbian service members holding "mission critical" jobs have been discharged as a result of the policy, which most Americans view as a failure. It's estimated that every year 3,000 men and women who want to enlist or re-enlist decide not to because of this law.

President Obama has stated his willingness to repeal the current policy. But will he make the same mistake as President Bill Clinton?

Following through on a campaign promise, in 1993 President Clinton tried to end the military ban on gays and lesbians through an executive order. But he was met with stiff opposition from the Joint Chiefs of Staff including chairman General Colin Powell, commanders in the field, and by members of Congress, led by Senator Sam Nunn a Georgia Democrat who chaired the Senate Armed Services Committee.

President Clinton did not enjoy a strong relationship with the military from the outset. He was perceived by many as a draft dodger during the Vietnam War and had done little to reach out to the military. That lack of credibility as commander-in-chief mobilized the anti-gay forces within the military.

The debate that ensued put Democrats on the defensive and divided the military between veterans and current service members. Social conservatives used the issue to bludgeon President Clinton and questioned his patriotism. As a result, it usurped President Clinton’s thin layer of political capital and forced him to eventually settle for the compromise legislation that has been in place since 1993.

Since that time, public attitudes as well as of those who served have shifted towards allowing gays and lesbians to serve openly in the military. An ABC News-Washington Post poll conducted in July found increasing civilian acceptance of gays serving in the military. Seventy-five percent of Americans in the poll said gay people who are open about their sexual orientation should be allowed to serve in the military, up from 62 percent in early 2001 and 44 percent in 1993.

This past November in Annapolis, over 100 retired generals and admirals have called for the repeal of the policy. To bolster their position, studies have been conducted that show that openly gay service members do not negatively impact morale or unit cohesion.

"As is the case with Great Britain, Israel, and other nations that allow gays and lesbians to serve openly, our service members are professionals who are able to work together effectively despite differences in race, gender, religion, and sexuality," the officers wrote.

President Obama is in the midst of trying to help fix the economy, healthcare, energy dependence, education, fighting two wars, as well as other key priorities. Although he wants "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" to be repealed, he was more likely to make the push later in his term so that he can use his political capital to deal effectively with the current economic crisis. Moreover, he wants to build a consensus with the military brass, in particular, so that the repeal would be easier for Congress to swallow.

But the introduction of this bill could force the president into the spotlight on this issue—sooner than he had hoped—and will give Rush Limbaugh’s Republican Party another opportunity to mobilize the base.

Aubrey Sarvis, Executive Director of the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, is urging the lgbt community and allies to write their congressmen to have them co-sponsor the bill. The bill will go before a subcommittee of the House Armed Services Committee for a hearing.

How President Obama uses his leadership skills and spends his political capital may provide an insight on his commitment to gay rights in general. He didn’t want to fight this battle now, but it looks like he must.

The Slippery OUTfield

A gay baseball player coming out would have to face tough challenges.

By Steve Charing

When the steroids scandal first hit major league baseball several years ago, I theorized it provided a convenient distraction for a gay player to finally come out. I had believed that cheating in a game that depends so much on tradition and integrity would overshadow any pesky disclosure that one of the players is gay. Or so I thought at the time.

I feel differently today.

No question, the steroids scandal is serious enough. Superstars Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens who are suspected of using steroids will most likely see their dreams of being admitted to baseball’s hallowed shrine—the Hall of Fame—dissipate.

But as long as a player in question didn’t lie to Congress or a law enforcement official, an apology here and an apology there would generally get the player off the hook, especially if he’s popular. Alex Rodriguez’s recent mea culpa tried to accomplish that even if he, too, could be spurned by the Hall of Fame voters.

Baltimore Orioles’ second baseman Brian Roberts is another good example. A couple of years ago he had been named in the Mitchell Report, which identified major league players who had allegedly taken steroids. Roberts apologized and insisted he made this mistake only once in 2003.

Brian Roberts is a favorite of fans as well as the team owner, Peter Angelos, for a variety of reasons. He is one of the premiere leadoff hitters in the game and a defensive stalwart. He works hard for charitable causes in the Baltimore community and is also easy on the eyes. Fans love him. Teammates love him. The owner loves him. He snagged a $40 million contract extension despite the steroids admission.

An active baseball player who publicly comes out that he’s gay would face greater challenges. My earlier opinion was that after a brief media circus surrounding the gay revelation, the hoopla would eventually fade away. For instance, if he was a good player, the fans and teammates might see past that and concentrate on team goals, as depicted in the Tony Award-winning play Take Me Out [see photo].

Although the general environment for gay acceptance is improving and the fact that each year several cities hold "gay days or gay nights" at major league ballparks, we’re not there yet. A gay ballplayer’s coming out may spark celebrations within the LGBT community and among progressive-minded folks, but that’s it.

More likely a firestorm from conservative religious organizations with their predictable sanctimony and threats of boycotts would ensue. "What examples are we setting for the children?" "Depravity has seeped into our American pastime."

This faux outrage could easily apply to the players embroiled in the steroid scandal, but nary a protest had been fired off by Focus on the Family, the Family Research Council or like-minded groups in that regard. You never hear them threaten boycotts when disclosures of adultery and criminal behavior surface among the major sports even though the Bible condemns those acts as well. To them, homosexuality is the bottom rung.

Besides the noisy clatter put forth by these groups, the gay ballplayer’s biggest hurdle is calming down a potentially hostile clubhouse. While it is likely that one teammate will stand before the bank of microphones and proclaim his loyalty to the gay player and extol the virtues of team unity and mission, the majority of the team will probably not be as embracing.

The issue is exacerbated by the fact there are many devout Christians in major league baseball (some have been steroids users) who see homosexuality as a sin. Added to that is the players’ fear of gays being in the same locker room.

Then there is the increasing number of Latino and Asian ballplayers in the major leagues. This is not to say that they are all homophobic or that American-born players are not. Yet the traditional macho-oriented cultures of these groups tend to revile homosexuality.

These challenges alone might keep a gay baseball player in the closet. But then there is the question of product endorsements and other financial considerations. Olympics hero Michael Phelps retained most of his endorsement deals but Kellogg’s dropped his contract as soon as the photo of Phelps’ smoking a bong flew around the world.

How would corporate America deal with a gay athlete? While many of the Fortune 500 companies have anti-discrimination policies for gays and lesbians as well as domestic partner benefits on the books, I imagine they will succumb to the threatened boycotts of the well-organized and well-financed conservative flame throwers and not offer endorsement deals.

The best hope for a gay ballplayer in coming out will rest with the fans. A gay player, especially one who is good at his craft and is popular, has a decent chance to be favorably received over time. Fans tend to be ahead of the players when it comes to social issues.

I suspect, however, the noise from the zealots and the fear of a dysfunctional locker room will keep the athlete secure in his closet for a while longer. We’ll just have to wait for a gay version of Jackie Robinson who can courageously negotiate the slippery terrain of the OUTfield.

Where's the Passion?

Small Lobby Day turnout signals possible declining interest

By Steve Charing

On a balmy February 2, a crowd estimated by the Washington Blade to be 250 assembled at Lawyers Mall in Annapolis for a rally during Equality Maryland’s annual Lobby Day event. This compares unfavorably to the previous years when, according to Equality Maryland’s figures, approximately 500 attended in 2008 and nearly 1,000 did so in 2007.

What’s going on?

There are a number of factors that may have contributed to the paltry attendance. For one thing, Equality Maryland’s legislative agenda is not as ambitious as in previous sessions.

Realizing that same-sex marriage cannot pass during this session, there will not be a full-throated push for the legislation.

Instead, the goal is to work with legislators to increase sponsorship of the Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act this year, according to statements made by new Equality Maryland Executive Director Kate Runyon. In addition, the organization will be pursuing once again passage of the Gender Identity and Expression Anti-Discrimination Act as well as other initiatives.

Another factor could be a general decline of interest. Following the Maryland Court of Appeals ruling, which upheld the state’s law that restricted marriage to be between one man and one woman, there was plenty of anger to go around and fire up the LGBT community as well as allies.

But lack of leadership from Governor Martin O’Malley on this issue and opposition by the powerful Senate President Thomas V. Mike Miller may have dampened the spirits of many gay and lesbian couples. These couples may be of the mindset that it’s a lost cause for now.

Another factor for the disappointing crowd is the prevailing lack of interest in these issues and politics in general on the part of large segments of the LGBT community. There are approximately 15,000 same-sex couples throughout the state. Add to that the tens of thousands of unattached folks, family members and other straight allies. All told, this is a significant number of people to be reckoned with. And with the media present, it would have made a great picture of the mall jammed full of LGBT activists.

But they didn’t show up. As is the case in previous Lobby Day rallies, Baltimore City, which comprises the largest number of LGBT people in Maryland, was woefully underrepresented. The areas of Charles Village, Bolton Hill and Mount Vernon—strong gay population centers—never seem to turn out in large numbers. In fact, the majority of Lobby Day attendees hail from Montgomery, Prince George’s and Howard Counties.

One would think that the devastating passage of Proposition 8 in California would spur on more people to rally and meet with their respective delegates and senators. Apparently that did not happen in Annapolis this year—at least not with the numbers that would impress those persuadable legislators.

Weather cannot be used as an excuse this time around; the temperature was in the 50’s—fully 30 degrees warmer than at last year’s bone-chilling Lobby Day.

Immediately following the Prop 8 debacle, nearly a thousand people, mostly from the Baltimore area, managed to gather outside City Hall on five days notice in November to express their displeasure at Prop 8 as part of a national Join the Impact movement. There was a lot of passion at that event.

True, it was a Saturday as opposed to Lobby Day being on a Monday—a work day for most—but still. It only took five days by the organizers using Internet social networking sites to pull off such a huge crowd. Did Equality Maryland tap into the Join the Impact network?

Equality Maryland is not solely to blame for the lack of turnout at Lobby Day. The director is new but capable. The organization dutifully publicized the event in area LGBT papers, but it’s not their fault if people aren’t reading them.

There seems to be a persistent lack of involvement and leadership from certain Baltimore-based LGBT organizations to get the people out. Imagine if even a small percentage of Pride-goers turned up at Annapolis. Imagine the impression that would make on legislators that this community is vast and they care. The lawmakers may pay more attention.

Clearly, Equality Maryland will have to recognize that there are varying degrees of interest within the community and that stronger efforts are needed to spark more enthusiasm. Attempts to obtain a comment from Equality Maryland’s Kate Runyon were unsuccessful.

Those who did attend enjoyed the speech made by Bishop Gene Robinson. But there was criticism levied at the speakers’ not being visible because there was no riser or stage. And the sound system was not up to par.

Logistical issues have plagued Lobby Day rallies in the past and may have tamped down attendance. These are technical glitches that can easily be fixed in the future.

Following the rally, the attendees split up to visit and meet with their respective legislators. Some of these delegates and senators were welcoming, supportive and courteous. Others were plainly rude or ignorant, or they simply declined to meet with their constituents.

When people tell their personal stories to lawmakers and relate how the lack of protections affect LGBT families, it can be productive in educating these officials.

And a large crowd on the mall will signal a strong determination to succeed. Let’s hope we can get that passion back.

‘Boys Will Be Boys’ on Sizzling Atlantis Cruise

By Steve Charing

After experiencing two straight cruises, my partner and I decided to try a "gay cruise" and signed up with the folks at Atlantis. Chartering the Royal Caribbean’s "Freedom of the Seas"—currently the largest cruise ship of all—Atlantis managed to jam some 3,600 passengers to sail for a week at the end of January that departed from Miami and covered the ports-of-call of Labadee (Haiti), San Juan and St. Maarten.

With a handful of exceptions, the passengers were all gay men, representing a vast array of ages, body types, and personalities, and they hailed from all over the U.S. and 24 foreign countries. Most were couples, but in many cases you would not know it.

The alleged incidents of sexual liaisons on the ship’s top deck in the wee hours of the morning and the "popularity" of the steam room adjacent to the gym made for colorful gossip and chatter. As a way of reinforcement, these activities were acknowledged and made light of by the two hilarious cruise directors and entertainers. In fact, most of the comedians on board included this phenomenon as part of their material.

Those who are still trying to secure marriage equality may feel discouraged by the fact that "boys will be boys" and wonder if gay men seriously want to make a lifelong commitment through marriage.

Putting that aside, the differences between a gay cruise and a straight cruise are as stark as say, being gay or straight. For example, on a straight cruise, a hot body on a man might be one in which his belly doesn’t protrude through his beater. On this cruise, there were several hundred who seemed to fall off the pages of fitness magazines and materialized into passengers. A large number of these donned Speedos sporting their own version of a stimulus package.

I haven’t seen so many six packs since my last visit to a liquor store. And not all of them were in their twenties. There were plenty of hard, ripped bodies shown off by men in their 40’s 50’s and yes, even 60’s, so take note.

To that point, on a straight cruise one can routinely enter the ship’s expansive gym and use the workout equipment without any delays. On this gay cruise, you’d almost have to make reservations just to enter it with so many gym bods on board. Indeed, it was fairly crowded even at 7 in the morning!

On a straight cruise there will be daily or nighttime dances and parties on the pool deck. And they can be fun. But please…do NOT attempt to compare them with these events on a gay cruise. OMG!

The "Dog Tag" party was smoking hot. You want gays in the military? Well here they were in their olive-colored garb with lots of flesh displayed. There was also a disco party with imaginative and colorful costumes to reflect the era. An undersea party took place in the indoor ice rink (that’s right, an ice rink) where it was so crowded and shirtless you were eventually doused by the sweat of all the men around.

And the crème de la crème of all parties: the notorious "White Party"—billed as the largest such event in the world. By the look of the exceptional and creative white costumes (well, a lot were just clad in tighty whities or less), one would think every big-name fashion designer was on board. To say the costumes were amazing is like saying the ocean is wet. And the soiree lasted until 11 the next morning (from what I was told!).

In all of these parties, the guest DJ’s were spectacular and kept the ship throbbing throughout the nights. Drinks flowed. Glistening bodies on display and gyrating to the relentless beats heard through the superb sound system.

Another distinction between a straight cruise and this one was the fact that upon embarking the ship at the outset, there was a drug-sniffing dog checking out each passenger. Some 20 were unfortunately caught and were arrested. Not only did they have to spend a night in a Miami jail facing possession charges; they lost their investment in the cruise. Ouch!

From what I heard the Atlantis organization filed a complaint with Royal Caribbean for "profiling" gay men. We’ll have to see where that goes.

On a straight cruise, you won’t normally see a thousand or more shrieking men jumping to their feet applauding the performances of a multiple Tony award winner as they did when Patti LuPone ("Evita," "Gypsy") gave a surprise concert. There was also a concert by openly gay Andy Bell, the front man for the 80’s group Erasure.

Gay and lesbian comics were all over the cruise. Ugly Betty’s Alec Mapa was outstanding. So was Comedy Central’s John David. Lesbian comic Poppy Champlin was polished and funny as all hell. The venerable Miss Richfield 1981 was her usual crazy self.

The ridiculously gorgeous TV personality Scott Nevins superbly entertained with comedy, impressions and song. He even had the chutzpah to trash Streisand as part of his act—on a gay cruise no less!

Two cute newcomers—the VGL Boys (Jeff Self and Cole Escola) tried their acts out. They had been billed as 21 year-olds, so predictably the youth-obsessed passengers packed the cabaret room to see them, even though the duo had no heretofore-known track record.

And then there was the ageless Charro who amazed everyone with her talent and endurance.

There were wonderful magic acts and piano and other musical performers. But my favorite of these was Matt Yee, a muumuu-clad, frenetic, exceptionally talented piano player/singer/comic whose audience resembled a cult. The Honolulu resident was the cult leader. Yee led them in frequent toasts, ordered the audience to denounce talkers in the group with expletives, and repeated the mantra over and over: "Asian men are huge!"

Straight cruises also provide outstanding entertainment, but with gay cruises there is a clear knowledge of the audience, and they target their acts accordingly. They definitely speak to the choir. And of course, both types of cruises offer abundant and tasteful food.

But the gay cruise has the bodies, the attitude, the parties and the campiness that will not be found on your bread and butter straight cruises.

All three of my cruises have been arranged by Cruise Planners.

Snubs Aside, Obama Will Do Right by Us

By Steve Charing

On the road to the election and inauguration of Barack Obama, there had been great hope accumulating throughout the LGBT community that for the first time, a U.S. President will be on our side.

That road had hit a speed bump when Barack Obama selected anti-gay Pastor Rick Warren to deliver the inaugural’s Invocation. Team Obama underestimated the strong reaction by gay activists that was carried in the mainstream media.

But the president-elect did not back down. This episode sullied the inauguration celebration and gave pause to what I believe is a monumental shift in the struggle for LGBT rights.

There were other missteps as well. Candidate Obama had allowed gospel singer Donnie McLurkin—an anti-gay, ex-gay—to join him during the South Carolina primary campaign. Mr. Obama then apologized.

Candidate Obama maintained his opposition to same-sex marriage during the Saddleback Church interviews conducted by none other than Rick Warren.

Candidate Obama did not forcefully speak out against Proposition 8 that snatched marriage rights already granted to thousands of same-sex couples in California.

No openly gay or lesbian had been appointed to a cabinet-level position.

The inaugural committee somehow botched up the schedule, which kept openly gay Bishop Gene Robinson’s speech from being heard by millions of HBO viewers.

Yet despite all these snubs, President Obama should be a champion for LGBT folks unlike any other president in history. Hopefully, we can, from here on out, praise the new president instead of criticizing him.

The euphoria that enveloped the nation and the world leading up to and including the days immediately following the historic inauguration will last longer than most. Given these turbulent times, that’s saying something. While some LGBT activists bemoaned the fact we were never mentioned during the 20-minute inaugural address, that’s quite alright. It wasn’t the place or the time.

President Obama emphasized accountability in government during the speech. The days immediately following the inauguration, he immediately demonstrated that.

His swift actions on closing trials at Guantanamo, issuing ethics orders, meeting as promised with his top military brass to end the war in Iraq and other measures signified to me that he will keep his campaign pledges.

And President Obama followed through with his campaign promises to the lgbt community by posting, in fairly good detail, his positions on most of the issues that are important to the lgbt community to the official White House website, whitehouse.gov.

He called the section "Supporting the LGBT Community," and he quoted himself as a preamble: "While we have come a long way since the Stonewall riots in 1969, we still have a lot of work to do. Too often, the issue of LGBT rights is exploited by those seeking to divide us. But at its core, this issue is about who we are as Americans. It's about whether this nation is going to live up to its founding promise of equality by treating all its citizens with dignity and respect." -- Barack Obama, June 1, 2007

Beautiful words indeed.

The issues covered include: Expand Hate Crimes Statutes, Fight Workplace Discrimination, Support Full Civil Unions and Federal Rights for LGBT Couples, Oppose a Constitutional Ban on Same-Sex Marriage, Repeal Don't Ask-Don't Tell, Expand Adoption Rights, Promote AIDS Prevention, Empower Women to Prevent HIV/AIDS.

This is freakin’ huge!

No president has even come close to outlining his positions on lgbt rights, let alone favorable ones. True, President Obama hasn’t yet come around to support same-sex marriage; at least he opposes a federal constitutional amendment to define marriage to be between one man and one woman.

What is notable on the website, however, is his commitment to end DOMA—the nefarious Defense of Marriage Act signed into law by former President Bill Clinton in 1996. He had publicly indicated to lgbt activists during the primaries that he will not only repeal certain components of the law but will seek to repeal the entire measure.

President Obama’s position to confer over 1,100 federal benefits to same-sex couples either through civil unions or some form of partnership recognition will not be realized unless DOMA is eliminated. The law establishes a federal ban on same-sex marriage, which nullifies federal benefits and rights and permits states not to recognize same-sex marriages occurring in other states.

But as we collectively lick our chops at the prospects of these other issues going our way, we must be patient a bit longer. The economic crisis is a major challenge that must be dealt with, not to mention restoring a framework for peace throughout key hot spots in the world.

The president cannot and should not use his political capital on anything except getting his stimulus package through Congress. That’s the primary order of business.

In the past, the ill-advised expenditure of political good will was damaging. President Clinton misfired when he attempted in 1993 to end gays in the military unilaterally—a campaign pledge in its own right. A significant portion of the military, including the top brass, as well as many in Congress, distrusted Clinton on military matters. This was mainly as a result of his evading service during the Vietnam era and a generally tepid amount of warmth towards him as he took office.

President Clinton miscalculated the opposition to the initiative, and we have been stuck with the absurd policy of "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" since then.

President Obama has stated he will work to build a consensus on that and other LGBT-related initiatives. Give him time to do that. He needs to get our country back on track first.

But I am certain he will make good on his word. Don’t let the initial snubs diminish our hope for a brighter rainbow in the future.

Dwelling Below the Radar

The Plight of Baltimore’s Homeless LGBT Youth

By Steve Charing

They seemed to get along as well as any Baltimore family that has a 16 year-old. But when the religious mother and stepfather of Antoine Williams (not his actual name) discovered he was gay, they immediately put him out of the house.

Following the incident, the parents of one of Antoine’s friends allowed him to stay with them for the next six months. When that expired, Antoine lived on the streets until he ended up moving in with five other gay youth and an older 24 year-old gay male. They lived together in a single room—all six of them—migrating from a motel on North Avenue to another on Resisterstown Road.

To feed themselves and pay the motel charges, all of them became prostitutes on the streets of Baltimore. As a result, Antoine contracted several sexually transmitted diseases (STD) as well as HIV.

Two years later, Antoine’s parents allowed him to return to their house. They still didn’t get along. He then moved in with a much older male in Baltimore to whom he was dependent. It was a relationship that in order for Antoine to be housed and fed, the older man demanded sexual favors from him. Antoine was exploited.

A couple of years later, Antoine found his own place, and at 24 today, he seems to be doing relatively okay.

Notwithstanding Antoine’s HIV status and other physical and psychological issues, this is one of the better outcomes when a lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgendered youth must confront the streets of Baltimore. That usually happens following a tumultuous family crisis generated by a parent forcing their child out of the house upon learning that he or she is LGBT or that they are so unaccepting of the child’s sexual orientation, the teen must run away to change the environment.

We perceive homeless people to be older and living on the streets, in doorways, alleys, abandoned houses and cars, under bridges and overpasses, sleeping on benches and grates and occasionally making their way into emergency shelters.

Indeed, according to the most recent census taken of the homeless population in January 2007 by Baltimore Homeless Services, a component of the Baltimore Health Department, four out of five homeless are over age 35. The factors causing adult homelessness are more likely to be economic-related or the result of mental, physical and substance abuse problems.

Living in the Shadows
Homeless teens who are unaccompanied (not part of a homeless family but are out on their own), including LGBT youth, also spend a significant time on the streets. But they are more apt to seek shelter with friends, extended family members, lovers, or occasional strangers like the ones Antoine met. This is referred to as "couch surfing"—finding any place to crash, however temporary, unstable, transitional and risky that may be.

"Homeless youth in Baltimore, ages 18 to 24, comprise the fastest-growing segment of the homeless population," says Nan Astone, a professor and faculty member at the center of Adolescent Health at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health.

A significant number of the homeless youth aren’t captured by the census because so many are in these transitional environments (categorized as unstably housed). Since the census survey is conducted at a point in time when homeless congregate at shelters, soup kitchens and social service centers, on a given day there may not be homeless youth present at these locations to be counted.

Moreover, homeless young people, including LGBT youth, tend not to reach out for assistance at these centers either because they eschew such mainstream intervention, distrust adults, fear they may be placed in foster care, or they are not aware of the services available. They are simply hiding in many cases.

Accordingly, these youth are dwelling under the radar, and their population is woefully underestimated. That is critical when determining the magnitude of the problem.

The Baltimore Homeless Youth Initiative (BHYI) with technical assistance from researchers from Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, conducted a parallel youth count in 2007 and found 272 unaccompanied minors and unstably housed young people under the age of 26 in Baltimore City. A majority of youth counted, 157 (58%), were between 16 and 19 years old. Of those counted, 145 (53%) were female, 108 (40%) were male, and 19 (7%) were transgendered.

The Baltimore public school system estimates there are as many as 2,289 homeless young people in Baltimore.

In the BHYI survey, there is no breakdown in the statistics regarding sexual orientation other than the transgender category, and again, these are extremely conservative numbers given the lack of visibility of homeless young people.

(A BHYI-Bloomberg School census of homeless youth for 2009 was recently undertaken, but the findings will not be available for several months.)

Forced to the streets
A National Gay and Lesbian Task Force report estimates that one third of American homeless youth are LGBT. Nicholas Ray, the author of the report says, "Ultimately …the crisis begins with family conflict and institutionalized homophobia."

Many LGBT children who are thrown out of their houses (referred to as "throwaways") have been victims of parental physical abuse or family conflict. They lack basic resources, education, skills, or a plan for the future. Some try to attend school but struggle; others drop out altogether. It’s not easy to succeed in school when their next meal is uncertain.

The throwaways are vulnerable to criminal behavior, sometimes through gang involvement, as well as becoming victims of robbery, rape and assault. They are also exposed to many risks that lead to poor health—STD’s, including HIV, survival sex (sex in exchange for money, drugs or shelter), pregnancy, depression and are more prone to consider suicide than other homeless youth.

These family crises that result in being forced out can be largely traced to the religious views towards homosexuality by parents. Clearly if the parents of LGBT teens are more tolerant, the throwaway problem would be mitigated. The support organization PFLAG—Parents, Families of Friends of Lesbians and Gays—has had an on and off presence in Baltimore for years. Unfortunately, there has been a lack of interest by city parents to sustain the chapter, and the families of LGBT city youth are not being served.

"Too many parents of LGBT kids are confused and uninformed," said Colette Roberts, chairperson of the Howard County chapter of PFLAG. "I get many phone calls from parents in Baltimore who are unable to travel to our meetings, and the best I can do is mail them literature. While helpful, they need much more in the way of education and support than a mailing can provide."

Limited choices for LGBT Homeless
If and when these LGBT youth seek out a public shelter, straight kids are more likely to be treated better, according to Ross Pologe, a venerable advocate of Baltimore youth issues. Young LGBT people, especially males, are often subject to harassment and violence at these shelters. "We have so much baggage about sexual orientation in our society," Pologe laments.

Ross Pologe, who for 33 years has been associated with the Fellowship of Lights, a facility that had provided shelter for runaways, ages 12 to 18, works with BHYI. "LGBT youth who are kicked out of their homes are not likely to seek help. They need stable housing." He urges alternatives to foster care as a key to help solving this problem.

To be sure, foster care has not worked well in Baltimore, especially for LGBT teens. The conditions are often intolerable. Foster parents who are religious have tossed LGBT kids out. When they are in foster care the kids are frequently harassed or shunned, pushing them to run away to escape. On a given day, 100 youth are missing from the foster care system.

The numerous homeless teens who wind up in the juvenile justice system face even greater challenges in getting placed in acceptable foster care.

Support is scarce
Community youth activist Kenneth Morrison, who at 19, helped organize a support group called Kevon’s Room in 2004 for Baltimore City’s LGBQT youth ages 13 to 21. As stated on the group’s MySpace page, its mission was to make Baltimore City a safer place for LGBT youth.

"Baltimore's youth have enough issues from poverty and crime to the lack of adequate education. Being ostracized by your family and community should not be one of them," according to the statement on the page.

Kevon’s Room had about 220 members and worked with both gay community centers and churches. But the group disbanded in 2007 when homeless LGBT teens comprised over a third of all the kids. "There just are no resources for homeless gays. No safe place for gays," Morrison said plaintively. "There was nothing we can do."

"If there is a neglected, forgotten community in Baltimore, it is the dozens of homeless LGBT youth," said Aaron Merki, who along with other attorneys and law students, are in the process of establishing the Freestate Legal Clinic in Baltimore to address legal issues facing LGBT youth. "Often they are sick, malnourished, abandoned by friends and family, and forced to prostitute themselves in order to shower and eat."

As bad it is for gay and lesbians to find adequate shelter, the problem is more acute for the transgendered youth. According to the BHYI census, 15 of the 19 (76%) transgendered youth surveyed were unstably housed.

Attorney Lisa Kershner, who is another founder of Freestate, is appalled by the plight of transgendered youth. "[They] face discrimination, hate crimes, and for the many who are homeless, are even being shut of shelters and left to fend for themselves on the street where they are at even greater risk for abuse and violence," Kershner said.

Homeless LGBT youth require stable living conditions to overcome the long-term challenges they face. While Baltimore Homeless Services does a good job in trying to cope with adult homelessness, it does not have specific services geared towards homeless youth. Likewise, the Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Baltimore lacks a specific program that is dedicated to LGBT homeless youth.

Light at the end of the tunnel?
Without question inadequate funding had been a great impediment to area providers as is a true sense of the quantitative scope of the problem. However, the aforementioned Baltimore Homeless Youth Initiative, which had conducted the parallel homeless census, is a collaboration of Government and community agencies trying to find better housing for youth for ages ranging from 14 to 24.

BHYI and other providers are attempting to create a building in the city’s Southern Park Heights neighborhood to house approximately 40 homeless youth. This housing opportunity, called Restoration Gardens, is expected to be available for occupancy this summer.

In Montgomery County there are plans afoot to establish a residential home dedicated to LGBT homeless youth. Hearts and Homes, a service organization for youth in need, is working with Equality Maryland, PFLAG, other organizations in the private sector as well as local government to make this possible. At the beginning, the residence is expected to have 6 to 8 beds.

Although the home will be situated in Montgomery County, youth from across the state can be referred to the home, says Carrie Evans, Director of Policy and Planning for Equality Maryland.

Several services will be offered. "We will provide 24-hour supervision with counselors, mentors, treatment, access to jobs and education," said Rex Smith who founded Hearts and Homes in 1964. "Besides housing them, we need to be teaching kids about their self-worth."

Lining up money for up-front costs is essential. "Our first order of business is raising the operating funds for the home, so we have formed a fundraising committee to devise a plan," said Evans. "Once we get some dedicated money we expect things to move forward quickly." A target date has been set for July 1.

"Homeless youth are not just younger forms of homeless adults," said Nan Astone.. "They are different in many, if not most, ways."

And LGBT homeless youth are different still and face greater challenges especially since they dwell below the radar.

ISO the Gay Barack Obama

We need a national leader who can unify community, win equality.

As Barack Obama ascended the Capitol steps to be sworn in as the nation’s 44th president, he will have a menu of problems not seen by any other president in history. Two foreign wars, an economy on the brink of collapse, environmental crises, the Mideast sitting on a powder keg, sniping from members of his own party, scandals all over the place—the list goes on and on.

But Mr. Obama, more than any other president in memory, has the potential to meet these challenges and threats with a good chance of success. Why? For starters he has the intelligence and vision required to steer the ship. He also has a mindset that emphasizes collaboration over confrontation, which is the first step in uniting a divided country. But most importantly he is a leader.

To effect change there must be leadership. Of course, Mr. Obama can draw on his near-mandate in the November election to press his case. But he also has the ability to go beyond simply pointing to the election numbers.

He inspires millions of people. His storybook and historic rise to the presidency was accomplished through his no-nonsense stewardship of his campaign and his extraordinary ability to communicate. If change does come, you can credit Mr. Obama for inspiring the masses using his innate ability to lift people up and mobilizing them to join in a movement.

Imagine if we had such a leader in the LGBT community.

No individual has yet to emerge who possesses the kind of charismatic qualities that can persuade, inspire and unite a diverse, fragmented and divided lgbt community. For example, we have seen Joe Solomnese, the head of the Human Rights Campaign—the nation’s largest LGBT political advocacy organization—attempt to lead the LGBT community during legislative battles in Congress, the Proposition 8 debacle, and the controversial selection of Pastor Rick Warren by Mr. Obama to deliver the Inauguration’s invocation.

Being the face of this large organization provides Mr. Solomnese with a platform to be such a leader. The problem is that the HRC (and by extension Mr. Solomnese) is viewed by many lgbt activists as nothing more than a fundraising machine with pricey, glittery, star-studded dinners with few legislative triumphs to boast. That subverts his leadership potential.

Mr. Solomnese and HRC do excellent work, and it is unfair to ignore their efforts to secure rights for gays and lesbians. Congress and the American people have been slow to come around to our cause, so success has been elusive. I don’t believe any individual and any lgbt organization would have been able to produce key legislative victories given the political and social climate over the past three decades.

There have been missteps to be sure. Mr. Solomnese’s unwise, highly publicized letter to Mr. Obama asking him to withdraw the selection of Rick Warren is a good example. He should have clearly known that the President-elect would not reverse his decision based on the demands of a leader of a gay rights organization. That lack of political sagacity set Mr. Solomnese up for immediate failure and raises the question, who then can ever be our leader?

That question remains unanswered after California’s passage of Prop 8. The immediate knee-jerk reaction by LGBT activists was to blame the voters, mainly African-Americans, for the failure to stop the referendum’s passage.

The blame game went on for weeks before there were reports that the individuals and organizations leading the fight against Prop 8 were incompetent or missing in action. Once again, it proves that if all you do is raise money and don’t know how to properly spend it, you are destined to fail—both in the results and in the perception of the folks you are trying to help.

The grossly inadequate outreach to people of color and seniors during the marketing phase stands out. Moreover, one of the "leaders" spent a month-long vacation during the prime time of the campaign. Other horror stories continue to surface about the execution of the "No to Prop 8" effort. Clearly, the leadership failures contributed significantly to the outcome.

Ineptitude and incompetence have impaired our ability to progress. The fallout from the Prop 8 mess exposed deep fissures within the gay population. Daunting as it might be, is there such a person with majestic communication skills who can successfully inspire, unify and lead our community? We would need a leader who can:

Help heal the ugly sore of racism that exists among gays and lesbians—on all sides.

Bridge the gender divide.

Lead young and old alike.

Recognize that fundraising is imperative but the community also includes people who cannot afford lavish events.

Gain the confidence of Congress, state legislatures and other elected officials, including our President, and work with them to achieve equality.

Engage in productive dialogue with clergy of all religions and denominations.

Embrace our transgendered friends and work hard to secure them the protections they deserve.

Those are the job requirements at a minimum. Now we need applicants. Is our Barack Obama out there?

Equality Maryland Outlines 2009 Legislative Agenda

"We’re in a good place legislatively"

By Steve Charing

Although the 2009 Maryland General Assembly will be intensely focused on a widening budget deficit amidst a weakening economy, Equality Maryland plans to advance a legislative agenda to achieve social and economic justice for the LGBT community. Several carryover initiatives from last year will form the core of Maryland’s largest civil rights organization’s efforts during the next few months.

The Gender Identity and Expression Anti-Discrimination Act will be at the forefront of the lobbying group’s priorities. The bill, which failed to emerge from the Senate Judicial Proceedings Committee last year by one vote, is designed to add gender identity to state laws that already prohibit discrimination in employment, housing, public accommodations and credit based on factors, such as sexual orientation.

Kate Runyon, the new Executive Director of Equality Maryland, noted during a presentation at the January 13 general meeting of PFLAG-Columbia/Howard County that protections for transgendered people had won the support of Governor Martin O’Malley when he was Mayor of Baltimore. "So why not support it at the state level as well," Runyon asked. His leadership would be crucial in getting the measure out of committee and onto the floor for a debate and vote.

To underscore the priority Equality Maryland is placing on the transgender bill, the organization is scheduling a separate transgender rights Lobby Day session to take place in Annapolis on February 16.

The regularly scheduled Lobby Day will be held on February 2 with Equality Maryland focusing on people of faith. To amplify that theme, Bishop Gene Robinson, the openly gay bishop of the Episcopal diocese of New Hampshire, will be the primary speaker at the rally. "He will be speaking about the importance of LGBT people of faith, being families of faith, and standing up for equality and justice," said Runyon.

Besides Bishop Robinson, Kate Runyon, who had worked on a wide range of LGBT issues in Michigan before she replaced Dan Furmansky as the executive director of Equality Maryland, will speak at the rally, which begins at 4:30 p.m. at Lawyers Mall. Lisa Polyak and Gita Deane, the two lead plaintiffs in the unsuccessful lawsuit to end the ban on same-sex marriage in Maryland, will also address the crowd, as will several elected officials.

Equality Maryland is scaling back expectations regarding passage of the Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act during the upcoming session. According to Runyon, the goal is to work with people to increase sponsorship this year.

When asked if Equality Maryland may try to secure civil unions in the short-term given that there is broader consensus among the legislators for that and Governor O’Malley has signaled that he would sign the measure into law, Runyon said the organization would rather wait for a marriage bill to succeed.

Noting that civil unions fail to offer the same protections as full marriage, Runyon explained, "The political climate in Maryland is favorable for passage in a few years. With patience and by lining up the right people we will achieve full equal marriage."

Another bill that will be pushed by Equality Maryland deals with removing the costly inheritance tax on same-sex partners. The measure would add same-sex partners to those already exempted from paying inheritance taxes. Unless remedied, the tax liability upon the death of a partner could be very costly. "This is an area that we need more equality very quickly as well," said Runyon in front of 50 people attending the PFLAG meeting.

A new bill will be introduced that addresses the legal rights of co-parents. This "first-of-a kind" measure would allow a partner without a legal or biological relationship to a child to petition a court for custody and visitation rights for the child they have parented if the partners broke up.

Displaying a Midwestern folksy style aided by humorous anecdotes , Kate Runyon explained the best techniques to be used when lobbying legislators and how to win them over. She emphasized the need to be collegial and respectful as opposed to showing anger and being aggressive. "We should be gentle but firm and with a presence."

She also suggested that children of partners be brought to the lobbying sessions with the legislators because they can make a powerful impression. "Why can’t my Mommy marry my Mommy?"

More information about Lobby Day and the legislative session is at http://www.equalitymaryland.org/

Stonewall Democrats Setting up Shop in Baltimore

By Steve Charing

A cold, rainy January 7 night didn’t deter nearly 30 people from attending the first organizational meeting of the Baltimore chapter of the Stonewall Democrats. Co-founders Luke Clippinger and Daniel Ewald are in the process of establishing the chapter to join the 90 that already exist throughout the country.

Those attending the meeting downtown were racially diverse with a wide variety of backgrounds and ages. There were folks from Baltimore City as well as from Baltimore, Harford and Howard counties.

"Given the bad weather, we were very pleasantly surprised to see that many people show up for this meeting," said Luke Clippinger one of the co-founders of the Baltimore group. Clippinger vowed to bring in people from Anne Arundel and Carroll counties by fostering a grassroots movement throughout the Baltimore metropolitan area.

Stonewall Democrats is America's only grassroots Democratic LGBT organization. Its main objectives include educating the LGBT community about the differences between the political parties, mobilizing the lgbt community to get out to vote on Election Day for fair-minded Democrats, and standing up to Republicans when they attack lgbt rights and families. It had been founded by openly gay Rep. Barney Frank (MA) over 20 years ago.

The fledgling group in Baltimore, however, will concentrate their efforts on local issues and candidates. "There already is a Stonewall chapter in the D.C. suburbs that will eventually cover Southern Maryland," said Daniel Ewald, another co-founder. "Having a chapter in Baltimore will provide convenience to local residents and attract more members from this area."

One of the principal goals of the Baltimore chapter is to help elect lgbt and allied candidates to offices. Luke Clippinger, who was one of three Marylanders who helped draft the platform at the 2008 Democratic National Convention in Denver, explained, "We will provide actual training for people on what it takes to run for office, how to be good candidates, and how to raise money."

Moreover, the chapter plans to educate elected officials on LGBT issues, design a grassroots effort to attract the LGBT community, and persuade more people to become involved in politics. The grassroots strategy includes media outreach, web presence (already on Facebook) and developing events.

While the national Stonewall Democrats focuses on federal issues and working with members of Congress, the Baltimore chapter will direct its attention to state and local matters. "We will try to primarily affect the City Council and various county councils in the area regarding issues that are important to the LGBT community," said Daniel Ewald, who is also an officer in the Baltimore County Young Democrats.

The Baltimore chapter plans to work with the Maryland Democratic Central Committee on advancing lgbt causes and devising electoral strategies. Clippinger noted that Equality Maryland must be bipartisan in advocating LGBT initiatives because of the nature of the organization, but the chapter will work with the organization on policy and other matters.

The next meeting is scheduled for February 4 when the group will focus on a temporary board, review of the by-laws generated by the committee, and planning of an initial event. Once the by-laws and other administrative requirements are approved by the national organization, the Baltimore chapter will be officially a part of the Stonewall Democrats.

For more information about the Baltimore Stonewall Democrats, e-mail lukeclip@gmail.com.

The OUTIES: Best (or Worst) of 2008

Happy New Year, readers!

In keeping with the year-end tradition of columnists’ picking the best, worse and whatever, I am introducing OUTspoken’s list of the Best (or Worst) of 2008, or the OUTIES. It’ s an unapologetic, biased, subjective, slanted list of the best (or worst in some cases) of politics, culture, the city, the state and the scene. Some selections call for a brief explanation; others clearly do not.

In no particular order, welcome to the 2008 OUTIES:

Best Date of the Year—November 4, 2008.

Best Campaign Slogan—"Yes We Can"

Most Inaccurate Campaign Slogan—"Putting Country First"

Best Political Decision—Barack Obama’s eschewing public financing to raise private contributions instead

Worst Political Decision— You betcha! John McCain’s picking Sarah Palin as his running mate. (See Most Inaccurate Campaign Slogan above)

Most Disappointing Outreach Effort—Obama’s selecting Pastor Rick Warren to deliver the inauguration’s invocation

Gutsiest Political Decision—Obama’s choosing Hillary Clinton to be Secretary of State

Most Nauseating Character in the Campaign—"Joe the Plumber"

Most Nauseating Word in the Campaign—"Maverick"

Most Influential Entertainer During the Campaign—Tina Fey

Most Ironic Disclosure—Turns out that daughter of social conservative Sarah Palin isn’t so big on abstinence only

Best Court Decision—California’s Supreme Court ruling that same-sex marriage should be legal

Worst Election Result—California passing Proposition 8, which negated the court decision above

Best Hollywood Straight LGBT Ally—Brad Pitt, for his substantial contributions to defeat Prop 8.

Best Hollywood LGBT Person—(Tie) Neil Patrick Harris and Ellen Degeneres

Worst Hollywood LGBT Person—Elton John, for his problem with the word "marriage" during the Prop 8 debate

Most Supportive Straight TV Commentator—Keith Olbermann

Best Lesbian TV Commentator—Rachel Maddow

Best Local Elected Official on Marriage Equality—Maryland Attorney General Doug Gansler, for his public support at a legislative committee hearing

Most Disappointing Local Elected Official on Marriage Equality—Gov. Martin O’Malley

Most LGBT-Supportive Baltimore City Elected Official—Council President Stephanie Rawlings-Blake

Most Vile Democrat in Maryland—Sen. President Thomas V. "Mike" Miller for standing in the way of transgender protections and marriage equality

Most Vile Republican in Maryland—Too many to mention

Best LGBT Organization—PFLAG-Columbia/Howard County, for not only offering year-round support to the parents of LGBT children, welcoming all LGBT folks and allies to the organization and providing a safe space for LGBT youth and their friends, but also producing on a shoe-string budget the splendid multi-media "Someone You Love is Gay" ad campaign that has been praised by PR pros. In addition, the chapter formed the largest contingent at Equality Maryland’s Lobby Day and its advocacy work has been a prototype for other PFLAG chapters.

Best Political Event—Join the Impact on November 15, which through the use of the Internet and a zero budget, on just 5 days notice managed to muster about a thousand (half of them straight) to a protest Prop 8 rally outside City Hall.

Best Non-political Event—Baltimore Pride, for its colorful, well-run parade, block party and festival

Best Gay Bar—PW’s Sports Bar in N. Laurel, for its friendly staff and crowd and its wide range of events and community involvement

Best Karaoke Gay Bar—Hippo with Steve Smith as the emcee and The Drinkery as runner-up

Best Happy Hour—The Quest

Best LGBT Bartender—David from the Hippo’s Karaoke room

Best Hair Studio and Day Spa—Neal’s on Park and Read

Best Piano Bar—Jay’s on Read

Best Change in Bars and Restaurants—Ban on smoking. Our lungs get to survive another year.

Best Baltimore Drag Act—Dimitria

Comeback of the Year—Britney Spears

Best Departing Hero—Dan Furmansky of Equality Maryland

Saddest Departing Hero—H.E.R.O.

Best Newcomers—Joe King and Makemie Taylor, for organizing the Join the Impact rally. It was a model for grassroots organizing.

Gay Bar Owner of the Year—John Cook, owner of PW’s who generously allows worthy LGBT organizations as well as community groups to hold fundraisers at PW’s

Best Conscience for People of Color—Rev. Meredith Moise. She speaks her mind and does it so well.

Best Jack-of-all Trades—Skip Koritzer

Best ‘T’ in LGBT—Drew Saine who does a fabulous job with the OUTloud website and Mara Drummond, a beautiful person through and through and who is active on LGBT issues. I love them both.

Best Baltimore LGBT Friendly Theater—Spotlighters

Best LGBT Movie—"Milk." Will the homophobes in Hollywood keep it from winning Oscars?

Best in Mining for Gold—Michael Phelps (not too shabby in a Speedo either)

Best Baltimore Sports Team—The Ravens who also wear our fave color purple, and Todd Heap is still a great Tight End

Best Orioles Off-Season Move—Finally getting "Baltimore" written across the road jerseys for 2009.

Worst Team in 2008 (and All-Time)—Bush-Cheney

Obama's New Pastor Problem

Just when we thought the Rev. Jeremiah Wright was behind us, President-elect Barack Obama has a new pastor problem. In selecting Rev. Rick Warren to deliver the invocation at the Inaugural on Jan. 20, Obama stuck a finger into the eye of every LGBT person in America.

You would think by now that he would be a tad more sensitive to this group of Americans who worked their asses off for him, helped raise and donated millions of dollars to his campaign and where 70 percent voted for him despite his opposition to same-sex marriage.

We overwhelmingly trusted this man to deliver the change we need and have long sought. But there were earlier warnings that, after some protests from gay activists, were generally forgotten as the dramatic campaign moved forward. Obama's controversial choice of gospel singer Donnie McLurkin--an anti-gay, ex-gay--to join him during the South Carolina primary campaign was not a good sign. But Obama at least acknowledged the mistake.

Now he chooses Rick Warren of the Saddleback mega-Church to have a prominat role in a high profile historic event. The gay community is not the only sector of the progressive wing who is upset. Besides his anti-gay marriage stance, Rev. Warren is anti-choice and anti-stem cell research.

Rick Warren, although he has been a friend of Obama, should not have been chosen. The decision is angering gays and lesbians all over the country. Warren was very vocal in support of Prop. 8. [See video clip below.] We understand Obama's desire to govern the entire nation, but really, did the GOP ever bring in lefty preachers to officiate major events?




Joe Solmonese of the Human Rights Campaign has written a letter to Obama asking him to reconsider. Here's an excerpt:

"...We feel a deep level of disrespect when one of architects and promoters of an anti-gay agenda is given the prominence and the pulpit of your historic nomination. Only when Rev. Warren and others support basic legislative protections for LGBT Americans can we believe their claim that they are not four-square against our rights and dignity. In that light, we urge you to reconsider this announcement."

That about sums it up. Another pastor problem for Obama. Another headache for him and for all of us. I do feel he owes us now.

Targeting the Persuadable Middle

By Steve Charing

The bitter reaction to the Proposition 8 fiasco last month has sparked a debate among gay activists as to the correct course of action we should pursue in our quest for equality. Some favor confrontation with opponents; others seek a more measured approach.

But which would be the most effective? The general lgbt strategy ought to be constructed with an eye towards gathering as much support as possible as opposed to simply fighting our enemies.

As I see it, our country is divided into three groups when it comes to LGBT rights. You have on one side of the spectrum most, but not all, of us. This segment also covers straight allies and supporters and otherwise progressive-minded citizens. They are in our camp. All we need to do is "activate" them more, especially those all-too-many gays and lesbians who are politically apathetic.

On the other end, there are religious people who see homosexuality as a sin. Added to this group are those who have no overwhelming interest in religion but despise, fear or are ignorant of gay people anyway. They are the homophobes; it is unlikely that we can change their minds. Some may come around especially if they discover a lgbt member of their family. But otherwise, their bigotry is entrenched and intractable.

Nonetheless, many gay activists have concluded that fighting for our rights—whether it represents same-sex marriage, non-discrimination in employment or the ability to serve openly in the Armed Forces—should be waged in the churches, synagogues and mosques throughout the country. Churches, and in particular the Mormon Church, have recently been the targets of protests, demonstrations and commentary on the blogosphere following the passage of Prop 8.

To be sure, the religious arguments against homosexuality are open to interpretation and are, at the very least, outdated. As such, the cited chapters and verses in the Bible have been cherry-picked to promote discrimination for eons. Other condemnations in Scripture are ignored while the infamous one in Leviticus pertaining to homosexuality is offered up ad nauseum.

Going to war with religious institutions and their flocks, however, is a losing proposition. This is decidedly true if one is arguing directly with the zealots who push Scripture as the basis for anti-gay thinking. We are not likely to be successful in puncturing their homosexuality-is-a-sin mantra.

Do we abandon the religious segment entirely? Not at all. We should maintain a channel of communication with clergy of all denominations. There is a small chance that some will at least understand the human rights element involved in discrimination and its effect on families and perhaps some may soften their hard line opposition to a degree. So it is worth it to engage religious leaders and establish a respectful dialogue.

But the preponderance of our energy and effort should be directed to the third group—the larger group—which I refer to as the persuadable middle. These folks are not committed to any one position on lgbt rights.

The subject may not interest them. They may be uncertain as to whether granting rights to gays and lesbians would have any consequences. They may have concerns with homosexuality but resent government interference in private lives. Or they may be turned off by religious dogma. This group is generally softer on the issue and, therefore, persuadable. We must educate them as well as our elected officials on our issues.

Fred Phelps and his Westboro, Kansas clan of "God Hates Fags" extremists (see photo) ironically help our cause. Not only does this group hate gays, but they also hate America. They have thanked God for the tragedy of September 11, dragged the American flag along the ground, and defiled military funerals.

This image of insane extremism turns off the moderate middle, thereby providing an opportunity to make the case for equality.

While arguing point-by-point Biblical references to homosexuality with religious citizens usually leads to a dead-end, it is legitimate to debunk some of the biblical inconsistencies when discussing our plight with the middle segment of society. And there is plenty of fodder to choose from, especially in terms of what is a sin. (See this excellent piece by Cenk Uygur on the Huffington Post.)

Moreover, we can make our case in terms of fairness and the impact of discrimination on the tens of thousands of LGBT families. That would help penetrate any resistance on the part of persuadable middle.

Evidence proves that this moderate approach is a winner. Recent polling indicates that we are gaining in all areas pertaining to LGBT rights. It explains why more and more corporations and localities are implementing non-discrimination and/or domestic partnership policies. These shifts are coming from winning over the middle, not from converting the religious right or the homophobes.

The positive trend is attributable to the middle’s feeling more comfortable with gays. Increased tolerance among the youth is a big factor. And as more people come out of the closet, it enhances the probability that someone will actually know a gay person on a personal level and would tend to be supportive.

Accordingly, we should continue to use our energy and resources to target the persuadable middle where the potential payoff is greatest. Let the bigots defeat themselves.

Huckabee Loses Again

Would be Pastor-in-Chief Mike Huckabee got undressed by The Daily Show's Jon Stewart on the issue of same-sex marriage. Huckabee failed to apply logic, common sense, fairness and history in making his case that gays should not be allowed to marry. Rather, he gloated as to how the majority asserted their will on the minority in statewide ballot initiatives.

Stewart was unflinchingly strong in his arguments; the best one being: "Religion is far more of a choice than homosexuality. And the protections that we have, for religion -- we protect religion -- and talk about a lifestyle choice! That is absolutely a choice. Gay people don't choose to be gay."

When asked by Stewart at what age Huckabee chose not to be gay, he had no answer. Hmm.
Stewart also could have also questioned procreation as the justification for heterosexual marriage. Should the marriage licenses of couples be revoked if they choose not to or cannot have children?

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Mike Huckabee Pt. 2

Barack Obama Interview
John McCain Interview

Sarah Palin Video
Funny Election Video

Keeping Our Cool

Radical reactions to defeats will not bring about the changes we need.

By Steve Charing

Believe it or not, I agreed with Bill O’Reilly’s recent assessment that the actions taken by a group of radical gay activists in a Lansing, Michigan church would hurt our cause. Of course, O’Reilly’s looking out for us warrants suspicion, but his point is well taken.

We have just experienced one of the most gut-wrenching defeats in our struggle for equality when the nefarious Proposition 8 that banned same-sex marriages in California was approved by voters by a relatively narrow margin on the same night we decisively elected Barack Obama president.

The consequences of Prop. 8 were stunning and tragic. A coalition of religious organizations and social conservatives managed to scare enough voters to restrict marriage to a man and a woman.

Tempting as it may have been to vent frustration and anger, the results do not give license to irate LGBT folks and supporters to act out their impulses by defacing religious buildings or other targets, as was widely reported. And it is no excuse for a radical queer group, Bash Back!, to disrespectfully disrupt services at Mount Hope Church in Michigan.

According to reports, about 30 gay activists in pink and black garb from the Lansing chapter began shouting during a service on November 9, throwing fliers at the congregation and making out with one another. They allegedly yelled, "It’s OK to be gay" and "Jesus was a homo" among other slogans.

From the Bash Back! website:


It received some media coverage, especially from a delighted FOX News, to heighten Bash Back!’s visibility—a stated goal on its website.

And with other Bash Back! chapters in such places as Chicago, Memphis, Milwaukee, Denver, Olympia, Philadelphia, Upstate New York and Washington, DC, we can expect similar outbursts around the country. This doesn’t help win friends and influence people, as the saying goes.

Barring any surprise legal victory in the California Supreme Court, our defeat on Prop 8 will clearly delay the ultimate goal of full marriage equality for those who aren’t fortunate to live in Massachusetts and Connecticut. It’s back to the drawing board where our efforts must be directed towards educating the public as well as clergy of all denominations that gay people marrying will not infringe upon their religious beliefs nor will it destroy the institution of marriage.

We must continue to tell our stories to elected officials so that they can see the human side of discrimination. We must explain how continuing to be treated as second-class citizens hurts families.

We must also point out that in Massachusetts, where same-sex marriage has been legal for over four years, the institution of marriage has not been undermined as the State’s divorce rate remains among the lowest in the nation.

This approach does work if the politician has an open mind.

One of the positive outcomes of the Prop 8 travesty was the nationwide mobilization of a movement called Join the Impact. In just a few short days of grass roots organizing and effective use of the Internet’s social networking sites, the campaign on November 15 mustered sign-waving crowds in the hundreds of thousands across the country from D.C. to Seattle to peacefully and resolutely demonstrate in support of our goal of marriage equality.

In Baltimore, for example, a thousand attended a rally outside City Hall last month to hear speakers tell their stories to a diverse crowd of gays and straights, old and young, blacks and whites.

"Our mission is to encourage our community to engage our opposition in a conversation about full equality and to do this with respect, dignity, and an attitude of outreach and education," says the JoinTheImpact mission statement on Facebook.

JoinTheImpact in Baltimore is quickly amassing hundred of supporters on Facebook, which validates its principles of educating the public and elected officials.

The tactics used by Bash Back!, on the other hand, will only serve to alienate moderate citizens and embolden right wing conservatives to continue their attacks on us as out of the mainstream and to generate fear of gays.

Our ultimate victory, whenever that will be, will be won at the ballot box and in the legislatures. Elected officials will vote according to the wishes of their constituents. We need to make our case and convince them respectfully. Allowing Bill O’Reilly and others to whip up anger against us because of radicalism will stop us cold.

PW’s: Howard County’s Friendly Gay Bar

By Steve Charing

There are several characteristics that would describe a successful neighborhood gay bar: diverse crowds, high energy, entertainment, friendly bartenders and staff, tasty affordable food, ample off-street parking, and giving back to the community. It’s clear that PW’s Sports Bar and Grill—situated in a strip mall at Route 1 and Whiskey Bottom Road in North Laurel—fits all of these. Yup, put a check next to each one.

It also happens to be the only gay bar in Howard County. By dint of its centralized location, PW’s is the social center between the bar scenes of Baltimore and Washington, D.C. The ownership takes that role seriously and is involved in a variety of activities that have advanced the visibility of the lgbt community as well as the viability of important lgbt organizations.

"The community has been good to PW’s, and we have tried our best to be good to the community," says John Cook, who is the owner of PW’s.

The bar is divided into two sections. The drinks are made and served in the saloon area. It has several TV’s going usually with a sporting event going on. The other larger rectangular multi-purpose room is a combination dining area, poolroom, cabaret and bingo parlor.

It was in this room that the bar recently held a successful fundraiser for Equality Maryland, the state’s principal lgbt advocacy organization. The place was filled to capacity as "Drag Bingo" was played. Each participant purchased a set of cards for $20, which coincidentally is the prize should you win a game of Postage Stamp, Big O or even Straight Bingo. The numbers were called by "Trixie," the colorful drag star of the evening.

Gay men and women from Baltimore, DC, Glen Burnie, all over Howard County, Bowie and all points in between descended upon PW’s to take part in the evening’s festivities. "I like bingo—it's the only gambling I do—and this was for a good cause," says Ron Hube of Baltimore. "[Trixie] did a great job. And it was fun to watch her get more and more drunk as the evening went on."

While everyone had fun playing the various bingo games and enjoying the campy hostess, the biggest winner was Equality Maryland, which netted $1,100.

PW’s is proud to host fundraisers for other LGBT organizations as well as worthy organizations in the Laurel and Baltimore areas. "We like the idea that members of the community look out for each other like an extended family," says Cook.

In the past 18 months PW’s held fundraisers for Equality Maryland, Breast Cancer Research, The Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS foundation, LARS (Laurel Advocacy Resource Services, which assists families during time of need), and is planning a fundraiser in the spring for the Howard County chapter of PFLAG –Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.

"Our chapter is the only LGBT organization in Howard County, and PW’s is the county’s only gay bar," says Colette Roberts, the chapter's chairperson. "It makes good sense that we partner together for the benefit of both entities."

PW’s had also sponsored runners in the AIDS Marathon, and donated money to the "No on Prop 8" campaign in California.

The bar has scheduled another fundraiser that will be a combination of raising money for Equality Maryland and taking donations for the ‘Toys for Tots’ program. "We would love to see everybody here on December 20 starting at 8 p.m.," says Cook.

PW’s is active in the LGBT Chesapeake and Potomac softball league by sponsoring two teams. They also field a bowling team in The Capital Area Rainbowlers Association in Laurel. And they sponsor a women’s volleyball team and have donated to a local basketball team –all burnishing the bar’s sports cred and generosity.

If that isn’t enough, PW’s hosts the regular parking lot show by the Straight Eights—a popular antique car club for members of the lgbt community. They meet on the third Sunday each month.

Drag shows are a regular feature at PW’s as they occur on the 2nd Friday of the month. "This is an attraction that brings in lots of straight people from the area," says Scott Gould, who is partnered with John Cook. They feature Miss Gay DC, Miss Gay East Coast, Miss Gay Keystone, as well as others.

Other attractions include Free Pool Play on Wednesdays and Karaoke on Thursdays and Saturdays. And if you are a football enthusiast, Sundays and Monday nights are for you. Each night there is a special drink special going on.

PW’s boasts a diverse, tasty and reasonably priced food menu that includes breakfast, lunch and dinner. It offers healthy choices as well as old time favorites. PW's opens at 6 a.m. How many gay bars can make that claim?

If you are interested in finding out what the latest fundraiser or event is at the bar or which current food or alcohol specials are running, visit their website .

The Prop 8 Blame Game in Black and White

By Steve Charing

When compared to previous ballot initiatives in the U.S. that amended state constitutions by limiting marriages to a man and a woman, Proposition 8 was a squeaker. With a relatively thin margin of 4 % California turned back the clock on their Supreme Court’s edict and banned same-sex marriage.

Yes, it was close compared to the blowouts in the other states where gay marriage was put to a vote, and California’s passage is arguably the most disheartening to gay activists and their allies. Since the California Supreme Court ruled in May that gays and lesbians cannot be denied the right to marry based on the state’s Constitution, some 18,000 couples tied the knot. The legal status of their marriages are unclear at this point.

The recent vote sparked angry but largely peaceful demonstrations particularly in Southern California. Gays, lesbians and allies marched in the streets and protested the role of the Mormon (hardly the vanguards of traditional marriage) and Catholic churches for their oversized monetary contributions to fund anti-gay marriage advertising, often using scare tactics to win votes. Some protesters turned their anger on various Mormon Church buildings.

As the demonstrators marched, the blame game began in earnest. Gay activists not only targeted the aforementioned religious organizations and their followers, but also African-Americans for voting "Yes" on Prop 8 by the margin they did.

Blacks blamed the "No on Prop 8" leadership for failing to adequately market their message to people of color.

Southern California gays accused San Francisco gays for not turning out to the polls in higher numbers.

Even Elton John was blamed for arguing the term "marriage" in the context of same-sex couples was a turn-off to voters.

Yes, there has been more finger pointing than a Three Stooges film festival.

There is sufficient blame to go around. With the election of Barack Obama as the backdrop, African-Americans in California voted for Prop 8, i.e. for the ban on same-sex marriage, by the widest margin of any group: 70%-30% (Hispanics supported the measure by 53%-47% and Asians and Caucasians opposed it by 51%-49%). That plus the higher turnout of blacks voting for the African-American candidate was seen by some as the reason for the measure’s passage.

But according to Nate Silver, the proprietor of the exceptional political numbers-crunching website fivethirtyeight.com, the black vote did not swing the results of Prop 8 one way or the other. "At the end of the day, Prop 8’s passage was more a generational matter than a racial one," wrote Silver. "If nobody over the age of 65 had voted, Prop 8 would have failed by a point or two." Blacks accounted for only 13% of the total vote.

One can argue that the 2-point plurality by white voters against Prop 8 was too narrow to overcome conservative ethnic groups, and that allowed it to pass. It is interesting that in the aftermath of the election a group called "Join the Impact" was formed in a matter of days. It organized the recent nationwide protest of the Prop 8 debacle. This protest covered some 300 cities around the country and garnered some one million demonstrators.

Imagine if such a visible nationwide show of unity was formed prior to the election. Call it "United for Equality." Think of the impression that would have been made on the general population as well as California voters by hundreds of thousands of gays, lesbians and supporters of all stripes peacefully waving placards.

The speeches by activists, politicians, couples and clergy would have helped make the case and could have influenced those who were on the fence. Even if such an event was held just in California before the election, how things may have turned out differently.

This is all Monday morning quarterbacking to be sure. What we don’t need is to blame the failure to achieve marriage equality in California on race.

But we should address the race issues that have been embedded in the gay community for too long. African-Americans have rightly pointed to examples of racism on the part of white gays and lesbians.

White gays are correct to assail the homophobia emanating from the pulpits of conservative black churches. Consequently, the weakest link within the Democratic Party when it comes to equality for gays and lesbians are that many African-American elected officials are not on board with our cause based on their religious beliefs, which stifles progress.

This is an incredibly complex and delicate problem, and it’s not just religion-based. While many socially liberal African-Americans may be otherwise supportive of our goals, they often resent the comparison of our quest for equality to the civil rights movement. And black gays and lesbians must endure the dual cultural experiences of both homophobia and racism.

What is needed is a dialogue to find common ground and try to end the divide. That won’t be easy, but it’s worth a shot. Blacks and whites need to reach out and come together.

The spirit of Obama’s election should help. Hope is great but action is better. And it’s better than simply pointing fingers.

Gay Activists Flock to City Hall to Protest Prop 8

By Steve Charing

As the clouds were building on a mild Saturday afternoon of November 15, so were the crowds. People arrived from all directions as they assembled at War Memorial Plaza outside Baltimore’s City Hall. Young, old, gay, straight, black, white, couples with children, urban, suburban, you name it, all came with a common message: Equal Rights for All.

Many of the protesters at the plaza hoisted colorful hand-made signs. Among them read: "Is my civil rights getting in the way of your Bigotry," "Divorce Kills Marriage—Not Us," and "Did We Vote on Your Marriage?"

Roughly a third of the crowd was straight and half were college age underscoring the hope that momentum will swing favorably towards equality as the younger generation moves into adulthood.

These folks gathered to be part of a speedily planned event called "Join the Impact" to protest the passage of Proposition 8 in California—the ballot initiative that banned same-sex marriage. Similar rallies were held that day outside public buildings in 300 cities across the United States (including three in Maryland) which attracted around a million people as part of a national day of protest.

"Prop 8 creates a state law to single out one group of Californians to be treated differently," said Joseph King, who was one of the principal organizers of the Baltimore rally. "This is not what America is about. It’s wrong." In addition, King received invaluable assistance from Makemie Taylor, Steve Haddad and other activists.

Sean McGovern, who is planning a wedding next year with his partner Stefan Freed, was the emcee of the rally and continually stoked the sometimes-raucous crowd, reminding them that the passage of Prop 8 told us we are second class citizens and we should fight back.

In only five days time and despite an ominous weather forecast that proved to be accurate an hour and a half into the rally, the organizers were able to draw nearly a thousand protesters. King and Taylor used a variety of social networking sites on the Internet, e-mailed local activists, and urged a number of volunteers to trudge through the streets of Baltimore, Towson and other locales armed with fliers and posters to get the word out. Press coverage was ample, with crowd shots and interviews appearing on local TV news stations.

The event received support in the form of statements by Maryland Attorney General Doug Gansler and State Delegate Victor Ramirez. Some speakers—mostly members of couples—excited the crowd by spontaneously approaching the microphone to share their personal perspectives.

Other speakers included Meredith Curtis of the ACLU; Vanessa Bowling who is president of Rainbow Soul, a Gay Straight Alliance at Morgan State University; College Park City Council member Patrick Wojahn who just returned from San Diego as part of the "No on 8" campaign; PFLAG mom Joyce Kipp; and the principal plaintiffs in the Maryland lawsuit seeking marriage equality, Lisa Polyak and Gita Deane.

While Polyak and Deane were in the midst of their speech, the clouds emptied on the rally-goers with potent fury and forcing them to disperse. Undaunted, groups of protesters later assembled on nearby street corners waving their signs as passing motorists honked in support.

"Now if we can just keep the rallies and the work going," said Sean McGovern following the rally. "No one can say that Baltimore didn't do its part!"

Discharged Soldier Discusses ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ with PFLAG Chapter

By Steve Charing

Outfitted in a sharply pressed dark suit and flashing a megawatt smile that illuminated his square jaw, former Sergeant Darren Manzella spoke before nearly 70 people at the Veterans Day meeting of Columbia/Howard County Chapter of PFLAG—Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.

Darren Manzella, 31, helped mark the event by sharing his personal story and discussing the impact of the travesty known as “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” (DADT)—the military’s policy that prohibits openly gay men and lesbians from serving in the Armed Forces.

Manzella is a Policy Advocate and Major Gifts Officer for the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, of which he had been a client for two years. His moving soft-spoken presentation was at times somber, but it was also sprinkled with a few humorous asides and anecdotes.

“I enlisted the U.S. Army in 2002 following the attacks of 9/11 when there was a nationwide wave of patriotism,” he told the audience. Manzella, a medic, eventually deployed to Iraq in 2004 where he provided medical coverage, emergency treatment and evacuation during more than one hundred 12-hour duties on the streets of Baghdad.

While under fire, he gave medical care to his fellow soldiers, Iraqi National Guardsmen and Iraqi civilians. His care during an attack in Iraq earned him the Combat Medical Badge, and he is also the recipient of several other awards recognizing his courage and duty to service in the war zone.
It was while Manzella was serving in the Army that he realized he was gay. Sgt. Manzella had come out first to his roommate, then his other friends, and finally to his parents. Eventually his fellow soldiers and superiors knew, and their reaction ranged largely from indifference to fully supportive.

But there were exceptions. Following threats of outing and a DADT investigation by his command, Sgt. Manzella wrote in a letter that, “I don't think most people can understand how hard it is to have to hide their true self; to have to pretend to be someone that they are not; to be scared that you'll be ostracized for being different; to be told that you're wrong if you live a certain life . . . that concerns no one else but yourself. . . . I am proud of myself and of the accomplishments I have achieved in my life.”

To his surprise, the investigation into his personal life was closed, and the Army deployed Sgt. Manzella later that year for a second tour of duty in the Middle East - again in Baghdad and then Kuwait.

After receiving word that Leslie Stahl of CBS News 60 Minutes wanted to interview him in Kuwait with regards to DADT, Sgt. Manzella was conflicted. He knew that telling his story on such a public stage would likely end the career he loved.

On the other hand, this was an opportunity to help other gay and lesbian service members by publicizing the discriminatory nature of the policy in an effort to gain public support for its repeal. He decided to go through with it; the interviewed aired in December 2007.

In March of 2008 his commander at Fort Hood, Texas informed Manzella, that he was being recommended for discharge under DADT. A copy of the 60 Minutes transcript was attached to the discharge recommendation. On June 10, 2008, Iraq War Veteran and Army Sergeant Darren Manzella was separated from the military with an Honorable Discharge.

The repugnant DADT policy is responsible for the discharges of 12,000 able service members since its inception in 1993. At a time when the military is actively recruiting those with sub-standard intelligence as well as felony records to meet enlistment quotas and beef up troop levels, fully competent patriotic gays and lesbians continue to be shown the door, which impacts our efforts in the war on terrorism. Nearly 800 specialists with critical skills, for example, have been fired from the military under DADT, including several linguists who speak Arabic.

And the costs of the policy are staggering. U.S. taxpayers have paid $250 million to investigate and root out patriotic servicemen and women under DADT and as much as $1.2 billion in lost recruiting and training costs.

But the issue will always be about discrimination. “DADT impacts all families who have gay children,” said PFLAG-Columbia/Howard County chapter chair Colette Roberts. “It's horrible being told your son or daughter who is trying to serve in the military is being treated like a second class citizen, hiding who they truly are.”

Darren Manzella, who now resides in Washington, D.C. working with SLDN to continue the fight for the repeal of DADT, is optimistic that an Obama Administration will take a serious look at the policy and try to gain consensus among the military’s brass. “Polls are showing greater acceptance of gays and lesbians openly serving in the military,” he pointed out. “It is the older generation in the military who is resistant to the change.”

Indeed, more than two-thirds of civilians support allowing gays to serve openly in the military. And despite the fear-mongering about unit morale, nearly 3 in 4 troops say they are personally comfortable serving side-by-side with gays and lesbians.

Those in the packed meeting room, which included some from the chapter’s Rainbow Youth Alliance, were captivated by the compelling personal journey traveled by Darren Manzella.

“Darren's story about a small town boy who joined the military to see the world only to become a man was truly inspirational,” said Sean McGovern, a member of the PFLAG chapter’s Advocacy Committee. “It struck me funny that the one institution that discriminated against him helped him realize who he truly was and that his fellow soldiers had become honorable men of tolerance with him.”

Nothing would vindicate Darren Manzella’s sacrifice more than the repeal of the ban and the liberation of his fellow gay brothers and sisters.

To contribute to the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, click here

Bittersweet

Obama’s majestic triumph tempered by heartbreaking Election Day setbacks to gays and lesbians

By Steve Charing
Senior Political Analyst

November 4, 2008 marked a transformational day in American history. With the election of the first African-American as president of the United States, the world, all of a sudden, became closer and a bit more unified. People were rejoicing in five continents. Although supporters of John McCain and Sarah Palin understandably may not have felt euphoric when the networks declared Barack Obama president at 11:00 p.m. EDT, I sure did.

But my elation was doused not that long afterwards, as three gay marriage bans and one anti-gay adoption initiative all apparently succeeded, reminding me that the country still has not taken that next big step.

For Obama, this was a contest that will keep political scientists and book publishers busy for decades. Barack Obama, a relative neophyte with a foreign-sounding name, rose from virtual obscurity and defeated a powerful Clinton machine to emerge as the Democratic Party’s nominee. Then he took on John McCain with his vaunted military and congressional experience, the embedded racism in the country, as well as the Republican Party’s fear and smear operation to win in an Electoral College landslide. In the process, Obama turned several red states blue with surgical precision.

There was as much good luck involved as there was skill. A perfect storm of events and personalities produced raindrops filled with smiles. He mainly benefited from the disastrous presidency of George W. Bush with whom he linked to his opponent, John McCain, with relentless regularity.

McCain incomprehensibly selected Sarah Palin—the butt of numerous jokes from her obvious lack of national and international knowledge—to be his running mate. The McCain campaign failed to effectively utilize the candidate’s strengths and instead defaulted to what the Republicans seem to do best: attack. And there were no significant international crises that affected the U.S., which would have highlighted McCain’s perceived strength on national security.

Then came the financial meltdown in September that accentuated the incompetence of the Bush presidency and McCain’s bumbling response to it. Added to that, notable endorsements from Colin Powell and a series of other Republican conservatives, the full-throated support from his chief Democratic rival, Hillary Clinton and her husband, and the die was cast.

But oh that skill! Obama’s campaign, led by David Plouffe and David Axelrod, crafted a blueprint on how 21st century presidential campaigns should operate. Always disciplined, always on message, always consistent, Obama successfully presented himself as the "change" candidate at a time the country was thirsty for change.

The campaign eschewed public financing and using the Internet primarily, managed to raise almost three quarters of a billion dollars to launch what was nearly a 50-state campaign. This forced McCain, who accepted public financing, to spend his more limited resources defending his own turf. That was crucial in states, such as Florida, Virginia, Ohio, Colorado and North Carolina.

In the end, the better campaign prevailed. And that is good news for the LGBT community.

Because now there is a much better chance for achieving non-discrimination legislation in the workplace, a Federal hate crimes bill and the repeal of the military’s "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" policy.

Expect to see openly gay and lesbian members in Obama’s administration; he kept reminding voters down the stretch that the country should not be split according to "gay" and "straight" among the other dividing lines in society. No other major presidential candidate ever used such rhetoric, and he repeated it to traditionally conservative gatherings in Middle America.

But those defeats on the ballot initiatives stung like nothing else has ever before. Just as national polls were indicating a gradual positive trend towards acceptance of same-sex marriage, November 4 proved to be a startling wake-up call that so much work remains. Ballot measures in Arizona and Florida resoundingly banned "gay marriage" in those states adding to the stockpile that has swollen since 2004. Arkansas voters sadly banned adoptions by gay couples. The ones suffering most from that decision are children.

But the biggest heartbreaker appears to be the results of Proposition 8 in California. While the votes have not been fully tallied at press time, the measure that would roll back a court decision legalizing same-sex marriage in the state, apparently is heading for passage.

Proponents of Prop 8 benefited from a major influx of funding from the Mormons, the Catholic Church and other religious entities to scare voters about the idea of two men or two women marrying. Tony Perkins, president of the virulently anti-gay Family Research Council, symbolized the religious support of the measure.

Characterizing Prop 8 as more important than the presidential election, Perkins said, "We have survived bad presidents. But many, many are convinced we will not survive this redefinition of marriage."

If Prop 8 survives the counting of absentee ballots, it will mark a staggering defeat to gays and lesbians since it was the first time rights that have been won were actually taken away. While it remains unclear if the existing same-sex marriages in California will be permitted to stand, the effects of such a setback will reverberate throughout the country.

And it mars the glistening victory of hope over fear in the election of Barack Obama.

Joe the Plumber Needs to be Flushed Already

During this campaign, I never thought I'd find anyone as obnoxious as John McCain. Then came $150,000 you-betcha Barbie with her Joe Sixpack and other overdone comic strip characters. But they were BOTH topped by this goofball Joe the Plumber, er Samuel Wurzelbacher. Ick!

This is the guy McCain calls his "role model"--an unlicensed plumber who lies through his teeth and owes back taxes--who McCain would take to Washington should he prevail. That's telling. He might as well be McCain's running mate or at least replace Phil Gramm as his economic advisor using distortions from a conversation this guy had with Barack Obama. He fits in with Palin nicely. What a team!

This average Joe already has a PR agent, seeking a book deal, country music record deal and a political career. But I see him as an a-hole. He introduced McCain as a REAL American, implying Obama wasn't.

Enough of this loser. He needs to be flushed down the toilet so a licensed plumber can extricate him--or not.

Biden Time

As Joe Biden loves to say about John McCain, "God love him, but...." I say the say the same thing about Joe the VP Candidate. I love him to pieces. I jumped for joy when Barack Obama picked him to be his running mate. But as is well documented, Joe's mouth can be a loose cannon, which could violate the main axiom of a VP choice: do no harm.

When all is said and done after November 4, Joe will not have harmed the ticket at all. Certainly nowhere near the apocalyptic effect Sarah Palin has had on the McCain candidacy. Except for the extreme right wing elements in the Republican Party, Palin has alienated the more thoughtful moderate sector of the GOP, as well as independent women, and we figure to see at least 10 percent of the party faithful jumping to the Obama side, mainly because of Palin.

But Joe Biden had to be reigned in, and thankfully he was. He didn't learn the lesson offered by Obama that even at a private setting like a fundraiser, your words are not safe. Obama discovered it first in San Francisco when out came the "bitter" remarks. It almost did him in.

Biden made the same error in Seattle by predicting the new president will be confronted by a contrived international crisis to "test his mettle." While that may be a likely prospect, those leaked comments nearly and unnecessarily derailed the Obama locomotive that had been gaining so much momentum down the track. Since then, Biden has been relegated to a scripted message and instructed to avoid press conferences in mainly smaller media markets.

Without question, Biden was a superb choice--Obama's first real presidential decision. Biden offers the foreign policy bona fides that many charge that Obama lacks. His vast experience in the Senate will also help sheperd Obama's agenda should he be elected. And as it turned out, he is far more superior and ready to step in as president than Sarah Palin.

More to the point, it also contrasted the judgement of Obama with McCain's. So yes, God love him.

Freedom of Speech?

Fivethirtyeight.com reported today that two pro-Obama men were surrounded by a mob of McCain supporters after they chanted "Obama" while wearing Obama tee-shirts and carrying an Obama sign at a McCain rally in Miami, FL. Police had to rescue the men from the crowd for their protection.

"People were screaming, 'Terrorist!' 'Communist!' 'Socialist!'"one of the two men told the reporter from fivethirtyeight.com. "I had a guy tell me he was gonna kill me."

Nice. If these pro-McCain folks would revere the Constitution's First Amendment as much as they do the Second Amendment, perhaps the USA will be a better place. That's not likely while dissent continues to be squashed by intimidation.

McCain's Last Missed Opportunity

On Meet the Press, John McCain could have taken the high road on race relations, but failed.

There are no more big play opportunities left for John McCain. The debates and the conventions are over. He will default to the the normal GOP tactic of "fear and smear" during the final days of the campaign.

His last remaining hope was a performance on Oct. 26's Meet the Press, which commands a sizeable viewership. This could have been the one opportunity to change the trajectory of the campaign. It was there for him to grab, to seize the opportunity. But as always, McCain, the non-maverick, stuck to talking points rather than breaking the mold.

When moderator Tom Brokaw showed the clip of Rush Limbaugh's explanation of Gen. Colin Powell's endorsement of Barack Obama where he shouted, "it's all about race," McCain's response was disappointing if not predictable.

When asked if Powell's endorsement was about race, McCain weakly said no but quickly pivoted to the five Secretaries of State (he had trouble reeling them off) and the number of admirals and generals of whom he was proud to have their support.

Here's what John McCain SHOULD have said, which I believe would have grabbed the headlines and MAYBE peel off some of the independent voters who have been flocking to Obama:

"I am, of course, disappointed with Gen. Powell's endorsement. But as Gen. Powell said on your show, race was not a significant factor, and I take this friend and honorable public servant at his word. I know I will be offending some of Rush Limbaugh's listeners, but I fully condemn Rush's explanation that it was all about race.

"We are at a critical time in our country's history. We are deeply mired in a major financial crisis that is affecting most Americans. We have enemies abroad who would want to harm us. We have energy and climate change challenges that need to be addressed. We do not need divisive and inflammatory comments from people on the air waves. We should not separate our country according to race or by any other category. If anything, we need to rally all citizens of the United States to forge a common effort to face these crises together."

Alas, McCain didn't want to upset his base by attempting to nullify race in this election. It remains his wild card. But in sidestepping this golden opportunity, McCain missed the chance to demonstrate a characteristic that has been sorely lacking in his campaign--statesmanship.

The Candidates Onstage

Letter published in the Nov. 2, 2008 issue of TIME magazine

Joe Klein would like Obama to tell the truth to the American people regarding the sacrifices they will need to make during this economic free fall [Oct. 20]. But it is clear that such truth-telling is not what the American people want to hear, nor does such directness help the candidate during an election campaign. In August, in the midst of the oil-price surge, Obama tried to suggest to Americans that maintaining inflated tires could conserve fuel. The suggestion, backed by experts, was mocked by the McCain campaign. Clearly Obama learned the lesson of Walter Mondale's attempt to tell the truth in 1984 about the need to raise taxes.

Steve Charing,

CLARKSVILLE, MD.

GOP's Brad Blakeman is an Idiot

The Republican strategist Brad Blakeman provided another glimpse of the "heart" of the McCain campaign and by extension his party with this gem criticizing Obama's trip to visit his ailing grandmother. It's as low as it can get. I'm surprised he beat the racist Rush Limbaugh to the punch.

Coming Out Week: Just the First Step

From my friend David Burgy, a junior at Swarthmore College. Read his excellent essay here.

Election Day Nov. 4: The Urgency of Now

By Steve Charing

During every presidential election cycle we’re told that the current one is the most important election in our lifetime. And the fact is, it’s usually true—especially the past few elections. But without the hyperbole, I really believe that November 4 will be not only pivotal for our country, but also to the LGBT community.

The Obama-McCain contest is surely critical. For our nation, an Obama victory will mark a dramatic shift from the atrocious economic, social, environmental, and foreign policies of the past eight years. And with an overwhelming majority in both houses of Congress, Obama’s progressive and common sense agenda will find an easier path to success.

The contrast between Obama and McCain on issues that are important to the lgbt community couldn’t be more stark. While Barack Obama does not favor same-sex marriage, it must be noted that no other major candidate for president ever has to this point. But both Obama and his vice-presidential running mate, Joe Biden, oppose California’s Proposition 8 (more on that later).
Obama does openly support some form of civil union or domestic partnership arrangement whereby hospital visitation and economic benefits could be extended to same-sex couples. For his part, John McCain flatly opposes domestic partnerships, same-sex marriage and adoption by same-sex couples.

Both candidates do not favor a Federal Marriage Amendment though McCain’s stance is rooted in the proper use of the Constitution rather than any inclination towards fairness. Nonetheless, VP candidate Sarah Palin supports a constitutional amendment that would enshrine discrimination into the law of the land.

The two disagree on ENDA, the Federal Employment Discrimination Act, which has been languishing in Congress for decades that would prevent discrimination based on sexual orientation in the workplace. Obama supports it; McCain does not. The same scenario would apply to hate crimes legislation: Obama favors it; McCain opposes it.

The military’s "Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell" policy is also an area where both candidates dissent. Obama favors repealing the vile law based on fairness and the fact it does not work. McCain would rely on the commanders on the ground for advice on that matter, and you know where it would go at that point—nowhere.

John McCain likes to call himself a "maverick" for the frequent times he crossed up his own party to sign onto bipartisan legislation. The current version of John McCain, however, is so firmly tied to the far right wing of the GOP that if he is elected, any chances for lgbt progress will evaporate. And Sarah Palin is even more socially conservative.

Besides the presidential race we must look carefully at what’s going on in California. Following that state’s Supreme Court’s ruling that paved the way for same-sex marriage, anti-gay opponents succeeded in placing the definition of marriage on the ballot in November that would define marriage as between one man and one woman. That referendum is called Proposition 8.

Even though this battle is taking place on the other side of the country, it should very much matter to us. "Maryland is still one of a handful of states that can achieve marriage equality in the United States in the near future," says Equality Maryland’s Executive Director Dan Furmansky. "But the outcome of the vote on Prop. 8 in California will directly impact our timeline here. If legislators see that the tide has truly turned on this issue, they will be more willing to put themselves on the line for what we all know is truly equality for same-sex couples."

Indeed this is crucial. Being outraised by nearly two to one, equality activists who oppose Prop. 8 are seeing their support in the polls slip as the proponents have used TV ads to scare the voters.

And that should matter to us. Furmansky points out, "An electoral loss in California would no doubt negatively impact our efforts to achieve marriage equality in Maryland, to what extent, we can't fully be sure. But it would make us more reliant on legislative wins in states like New York and New Jersey to convince legislators that the time has come for our state as well."

A loss would also embolden opponents of same-sex marriage in Maryland to push harder to have the matter put to a popular vote. That’s a slippery slope with uncertain consequences. If voters in a state like California can roll back the clock, that is not a good sign for Maryland.

To help level the playing field, money, as always, is the best way to defeat Prop. 8. Please visit here to learn how you can help and now!

With a favorable election outcome, both nationally and in California, LGBT Marylanders may finally see the light at the end of a tunnel. If not, the tunnel gets longer and darker.

Candidates must do more to stifle supporters' vitriol

Letter published in the

Oct. 15, 2008 Howard County Times

Once again we are reading that p