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Four Decades Along the Rainbow Road

Sunday, September 09, 2018

“Mr. President, please sit down with Robert Mueller”

An open letter to Donald Trump
Image: The Hill

Dear Mr. President,

Although I’m not one of your supporters, I have so much in common with you I feel there’s a kinship whereby I can offer you good advice.

For example, we both grew up in Queens.  We both have been unable to shed that horrific New York accent. We both lost money in casinos. Neither of us publicly revealed our tax returns. We both suck at golf though you have spent a quarter of your presidency on golf courses.

Yes, you avoided military service like the plague and I served, but we’re both civilians now, right? We both hold Jeff Sessions in low regard. We both have contributed to the Clintons.

We both believe Rick Perry is the smart one in your cabinet. We both feel tall next to Kim Jong-un. We’re both bald.  Neither of us was invited to two high profile funerals and a royal wedding.  You think Ivanka is pretty; I think Jared is pretty.

I can go on but I know you’re busy with all that executive time.

Here’s my advice. If Special Counsel Mueller invites you to sit down for an interview, please go. What do you have to hide? 

Ignore your attorneys’ advice to avoid it. I mean, come on…Rudy Giuliani? You gotta be kidding.

You said many times there’s no collusion, no obstruction. Go with it.  We all know you never lie. All those negative stories about you from so many people can’t be true, right? So, go and show how honest you are under oath.

Yes, Mr. Mueller is a very intelligent, well respected individual and a war hero. But does he have his name on buildings around the world? I think not. Has he accumulated as many ex-wives as you? No way.

You can outsmart him with one hand tied behind your back. You went to the best schools and know the best words. It would be a piece of cake for you.

You don’t want to show that you’re weak and that you have something to hide. Your enlightened base would turn on you. They want strength, not weakness. The last thing you want to see is #TrumpScaredOfMueller trending on Twitter.

Go ahead, Mr. President. Make America great again and agree to an interview with Mr. Mueller.

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